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    New to MWO and curbing use

    Hello. I am a 43 year old mom of teen boys. I started binge drinking in high school, around 14. I do enjoy drinking and it is a big part of my husband's and my social life, but over the past couple of years, it has evolved into a bottle of wine or more a night (on my own). It feels like it is mostly just a habit...I start craving around 5pm and drink until bed time. I wake up with a hangover about 3-4 times a week and I hate it! I also hate the shame I feel for not being able to control myself. The relaxation and "letting go" feeling when I drink just seem to be too good for me to pass up every evening.

    I've read lots of great books on moderate drinking and I think AA would never be for me--I am definitely a fan of the non-12-step programs. I feel like I just got ripped off, though, because I paid $700 for some supplements/exercises that I just got, am supposed to take 6 times a day and they are drops that taste horrible! I know I can't follow that program (looking to get at least a partial refund), so here I am, once again looking for a way to cut back.

    I just ordered the Kudzu Rescue from the MWO site and am hoping that helps, but am concerned about rushing into another program with more $$$ only to find I can't maintain it.

    Well, that's my story. I'm glad you're here and looking forward to learning from everyone.

    #2
    New to MWO and curbing use

    :welcome:

    If it's just a habit, then it shouldn't be too hard to stop or cut back. If you find it difficult to stop or cut back, then you may be looking at something more than a habit.

    Have you downloaded the My Way Out book to give that a read? (maybe so since you mention the kudzu) If not, that might be a good start. The e-book is only $13 or something like that, IIRC.

    I think nutrition and exercise can play a vital role in recovery. They sure did for me anyway. Those things alone were not a magic bullet for me. It was actually very difficult to stop drinking. But it was the best thing I ever did for myself.

    Best wishes to you on your journey!

    DG
    Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
    Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


    One day at a time.

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      #3
      New to MWO and curbing use

      Hi dkmtw and a big welcome!
      I'm glad you're here and look forward to getting to know you. My "habit" turned me into a 12+ beer per night drinker. Slowly but surely it increased, until I was up to 14 beers, on a weeknight. The hangovers at work became a daily ritual. It's sad what we convince ourselves is "normal", the dizziness, nausea, tingling in limbs, etc, etc.
      You've taken a great first step by coming here. I too, have a teenager, and as I posted in another thread, my "bottom" was the day she tearfully handed me a letter because she couldn't say out loud what my drinking was doing to her :upset:
      Please stick around and read...there is a limitless amount of wisdom and experience here.
      Take each day as it comes.
      K9
      :heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:

      Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.

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        #4
        New to MWO and curbing use

        I'm with you

        Hi dkmtw (sorry about the initials, not many brain cells left).

        We have lots in common. I often drink my bottle of wine alone on week nights (hubby travels). Have to time it so its too late for me to go out and get more - yet not so late that I'm still buzzed for work in the morning. On weekends (when I dont have work the next day) I drink until . . . I don't know, until I cant pour? I'm never cognizant at that point and am clueless as to what I possibly could be thinking. Next day is regrets, disappointment, depression and the look of disappointment on my beloved's face.

        I'm surprised that I'm not addicted. I actually can go all week (I even did a weekend a few times) without a drink.

        I am hoping the bag of tricks I ordered helps give me some control. I'm still reading the book.

        I was alcohol free yesterday (and so far today!). I plan to make My Plan - and start with 30 days of abstinence. I'm interviewing for a new job and am too stressed right now to let go of my comfort zone - but I'm really making the effort to not drink in the week and be nearly a normal heavy drinker on weekends. I would like to be someone who has an occasional drink without getting sloshed and thinking about opening another bottle before the first is finished. I don't yet know if I can be that person - but I want to be.

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          #5
          New to MWO and curbing use

          I also am of the belief that if it is just a habit - you will be able to stop without much difficulty. It may take some will power and conscience effort - but you will succeed. If you are 'past' the point of "habit" and have become addicted - you will need more than will power. I would highly recommend stopping for 30 days to know the difference. If it's a habit - you may decide that you just feel so much better without it that you continue on! If it's an addiction - you will have the first 30 days of Abstaining behind you and can focus on your new AF life!

          Best to you!
          Put your hands over your heart - and tell yourself that you are going to guard this essence of who you are with everything. Alcohol opens us up to darkness and depression instantly. You choose love today. Guard it by keeping the poison out of your body. It IS poison.



          NF - May 2, 2013 (cig free Jan. 25, 2013)
          AF - July 31, 2013
          :lordhelpme:

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