First Time Here...

[FreeFly]

Hi, I've got to do something. Just can't go on like this. 45 year old "intelligent" (guess that's debatable seeing as I drink wine every night) spiritual lady. Feel like a lost cause and in need of some support. Have had quite a few attempts recently to stop and I feel SO much better when I do. Honestly feel like I've cracked it but then something causes me to fall down the rabbit hole again and it's so bloody hard to get out again. So, why do I keep doing it. Sad to say I have been drinking this evening but want so very much to stop. Inspired by the "30 day" thing. I want to start tomorrow - too late today! So am looking for some support from understanding folk who know what a demon the bottle of wine truly is. Thanks and sorry to moan on!

[Unwasted]

First Time Here...

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...est-30074.html

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html

Can't Believe - The above two links are great places to get started. I wanted to welcome you and just say that you've found a great place for support. The tool box has a lot of invaluable information! The Newbie's nest is great support when you're just getting going on racking up some AF days.

I totally relate to the wanting to stop and then caving. I did that for a year, and so have many here. So, you're not alone! Just keep reading and posting, getting feedback, and then deciding how you want to proceed. Good luck on 30 days.

I highly recommend reading Kick the Drink by Jason Vale -- it has helped me and many others here!

Best to you!

[Lavande]

First Time Here...

Hi CantBelieve,

Welcome to MWO, this is a good place
I am a former wine drinker (abuser) myself & am grateful to have quit all that 2 1/2 years ago. You can do it too!

I started out by downloading the MWO book from the Health store here. It has a lot of info about the program, supplements, Hypno CDs, etc.

You need to make yourself a good plan too! Here's a link to the https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html which is full of great ideas to help you make your plan.

A strong desire & commitment to stop drinking & a good plan will help you reach your goals!
Please drop in the Newbies Nest thread for more support - lots of folks there just getting started as well.

Wishing you the best!

Lav

[FreeFly]

First Time Here...

Thank You!

Thank you Unwasted - how nice that must feel.

I must have read one of your posts earlier because since my first post I've read reviews and ordered Jason Vale's book. Again, thanks in advance. The reviews were great so I'm hoping I'll have a similar reaction. Have to confess though, part of me thinks that I'll be the one it doesn't work for. I know that's the demon but it's a little bugger isn't it! Should be here in a few days and I will read and devour. I've never gone to AA because I hate labels and dogma. Would never work for me. Hoping this book will shine a little light. Bless you for replying to me :-)

[FreeFly]

First Time Here...

Thank You Too!

Hi Lavande,

I'm rather taken aback already about support coming my way. It's a funny thing, the bottle of wine a night thing (although recently it has become a bottle and a half). Easy to hide, and not, considered by some I guess, to be a problem. But what a big fat problem it is. Day in, day out. I lead a "normal", "healthy" life, or at least that's what I think I present to the world. The double life. But now it's definitely taking its toll - in looks, in motivation, in work, in relationships, in every way. Just can't keep doing it. I'm tipping the scales. It's no longer easy to live that double life and I'm sick of it. Again, sorry to moan on but that's what it does, right? I'm glad I've found this place. My intention is to start afresh tomorrow - already said, too late tonight. So, thank you!

[Unwasted]

First Time Here...

Can't Believe - you might surprise yourself.....just keep an open mind. Another thing I think has promise is self-hypnosis (Super Crew talks about it on his thread). Fascinating stuff - worth reading how it helped him!

Keep reading and posting - let us know how it goes. I think the book works but obviously you'll have to want to quit. Regardless, though, it's great information and strong ammunition against the mental addiction of alcohol. :l

Here's a link to Super Crew's thread:

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f8...ion-52724.html

[FreeFly]

First Time Here...

You have no idea Unwasted how much I want to quit. I really can't believe how long I've been doing this nonsense! I've "managed" to maintain a "normal" life but I'm so aware of how different everything could have been. What a waste! So, new steps. I'll check out Super Crew, thank you. I need to calm my mind so meditation/self hypnosis will help. I will keep you posted. I SO appreciate the support. It's been a lonely path - not in the "normal" life - but in what is really going on inside. I want to beat these demons. Funny thing is, I have a sense that it's a lot easier than I think - if that makes sense. Even though I keep falling down that rabbit hole - when it's good, it really is just that.

[daisy45]

First Time Here...

Hi CantBelieve, don't worry about tonight - every single person here had to have their last drink at some stage. Tomorrow is a new day. I know and you do that you can feel so determined, then as soon as you start to feel better, the thoughts come creeping back. You need to arm yourself and be prepared. I can't really add to what Lav and Unwasted have said - really good advice. If you have time tonight, take a look. I don't know what your schedule is but spending as much time on MWO in the first day especially is a great start. There is a wealth of information here. Other peoples stories, struggles, messages of inspiration, all help to bolster that resolve.
It took me a long time to take some of the advice (wish I had done earlier) but I now have the supplements, CDs and L-Glut. Read Jason Vales book last week - can't wait to hear how you feel after you've read it. I am totally blown away.
You very much describe how I was living my life. You think you are getting on OK, look OK, are getting through the days, but when you get that AF time into your life you will only really then appreciate what alcohol has stolen from you.
I really wish you all the strength and determination. Dig deep and want this more than anything you've ever wanted in your life - best of luck...you are never alone when you are here.

[FreeFly]

First Time Here...

Hi Daisy, you've brought tears to my eyes. I've checked out SuperCrew link and know how much I'm kidding myself. It's true about arming myself. I've had numerous attempts recently and I honestly feel so damn good when I don't drink. Then that little voice (demon) is there on my shoulder nagging me that I want to have a little tipple, just one last time. How many of them have I had. I've been embarrassed to confess just what a problem it is for me so have never sought any help. I know AA is not for me but hadn't found anything else. Tonight I feel a little more connected and am so very grateful for the support received already. I am going to set the intention as I go to bed that tomorrow I start anew. I will revisit this site and read more to help me on my way. Bless you for replying - thanking you from my heart.

[Doggygirl]

First Time Here...

Hi Cant and :welcome:

Well, I certainly know what evil lies in a bottle of wine, that's for sure. Like Lav, I got my start on the sober path by downloading the MWO book from the health store. It made a lot of sense to me addressing nutritional deficiencies, etc. along with craving reduction supplements, excercise, diet recommendations, and hypnosis CD's. I followed all the recommendations in the book except for the prescription medication Topomax.

The road was rocky but here I am. I had to humbly learn along the way to not rule anything out. I'm very glad about that now as I am truly content in my sobriety. That took doing some things I swore I would never do.

Best of luck to you!

DG

[FreeFly]

First Time Here...

Thank You Too!

Hi Doggygirl,
Will take your advice and check out the info here. Like you, I won't be taking prescription drugs. Crazy as it may seem, plying ample alcohol down my gut, I'm so anti prescriptions. Will take dietary and supplement advice. I so appreciate the support on this site - it's making my desire really strong to report a day alcohol free. I'm off to bed now to start afresh tomorrow. Thank you

[FreeFly]

First Time Here...

My goodnight message to all. It's been a very lonely path but already I feel like I'm not alone. Truly surprised at the goodwill and understanding messages received. I keep saying it, but thank you and will check in tomorrow. Will have a look at others' struggles, good advice and hopefully build a plan of action. I wonder what it's like to be alcohol free for a good long time :-) x

[BabyQ]

First Time Here...

Me TOO!

Can't Believe - I joined the forum today (for my second time - couldn't remember the log in... enough said). I am a 30 something mom that seems to have it all together as well, but that wine at night is my best friend at the moment. Even as I type that I know that statement is not acceptable. My husband, my children, heck.. even the dog should be higher on the list than that darned wine!!! I have been at 1 1/2 to 2 bottles of wine a day for too darned long.

It's funny that I work in healthcare and we are trained to expect that the average person lies about their alcohol consumption and that we should expect that it is double what they admit too. That being said, I would most likely not admit to a bottle of wine a night!

So many people talk about making a plan, and I think it finally hit home. My plan was always, drink less tomorrow.... Nope. I made a calendar and planned out the next two weeks. I am going to taper off so that I can actually sleep. I do know that if I don't drink in the evening I get a bit of the anxiety monster and just CAN'T sleep. My last AF day was too long ago and had more anxiety than I care for.

I am here just putting one foot in front of the other at the moment.... Just like everyone else.

[Unwasted]

First Time Here...

Baby Q - welcome! If you'll give it time and maybe have a bad night's sleep for a very short period of time, your sleep will correct itself and you'll marvel at the quality of rest you'll get without alcohol. You'll be blown away -- give it a chance!

CB, you and BQ are definitely not alone. You are with people who understand and are here for you. It takes time and learning how to rearrange your attitude about alcohol - how to really internalize the fact that it's a poison that is robbing you of a good life. If you can ever make that shift in your thinking, you will embrace sobriety and never look back. It's a process, and you have to want to learn how people made the change in their lives, but it can come together for you. We all felt like it was impossible once upon a time and now we're living a totally different life void of the exhaustion, struggle and depression that comes with trying to constantly control your drinking. Here is an acronym I like from Jason Vale:

Whenever you're down and thinking "I Can't Drink" - remind yourself that you're free of the:

C onstant
a nd
N ever ending
T orture

of Alcohol!


Peace and Strength to You Both::l

[daisy45]

First Time Here...

Baby Q, every time I try to sleep after drinking for a while the first night alcohol-free is always the worst. Persevere, persevere, it does get better. I never thought I'd go to sleep natually but I do and I even feel proud of that. Every little step is an achievement. Good luck and stick to MWO like glue!
Cant Believe, hope your day is a good one - rooting for you!