Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

Collapse
X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 1
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous template Next
    #1

    Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

    here we go again, day one, my 6th? 7th? day one in as many years of drinking... a third of my life totally wasted on this. So I'm back, I'm hoping that at least this time I'll learn my lesson n be able to not drink on my own, I want to be a social drinker... hell scratch that I want to be a normal drinker but not much hope of that now, a third of my life given over to this addiction. Did 45 days last year, went to a festival, had a few, ahven't been sober for 24 hours since. I feel like finally this time I've been brought to my knees, it can't carry on. so bag to blogging my attempts, back to just strating out...

    xIC
    I have faced it, a life wasted, and I am never going back there again

    To ya'll my name is inchy. I am an alcoholic - and priority number one is making it to the end of this day AF. No excuses.

    18.08.13
    Tags: None
    #2
    Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

    9.59, february 6th

    the unpleasantness is startign to set in... i would usually be at least halfway to drunk by now, if not totally gone. I'm feeling twitchy, anxious, on edge, very awake and totally exhausted... this is how it starts, bracing myself to ride the wave...
    I have faced it, a life wasted, and I am never going back there again

    To ya'll my name is inchy. I am an alcoholic - and priority number one is making it to the end of this day AF. No excuses.

    18.08.13

    Comment

      #3
      Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

      Hang in there IC!
      Stay on MWO as long as you can, do lots of reading. Drink some herbal tea to help calm you down.
      Write out your plan - what do you want for the future? Make a list.

      You can do this
      Lav
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

      Comment

        #4
        Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

        thanks lav

        so day 2, 11.02am, on the bus to uni in half an hour, feeling... about as good as i'm liekly to on day 2 haha.
        I have faced it, a life wasted, and I am never going back there again

        To ya'll my name is inchy. I am an alcoholic - and priority number one is making it to the end of this day AF. No excuses.

        18.08.13

        Comment

          #5
          Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

          Inchy, just sending support. Have you tried any meds? Not promoting them, just wondering about your story. :lilheart:

          Comment

            #6
            Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

            Me too suggesting some chemical help!! It is not for everyone - especially as you are at university but gee if you are really struggling it may be something to seriously think about. Have you talked to your doctor? Please stick around so we can support you!!!
            Ask yourselves, would you rather be a non drinker with an occasional desire to drink or a drinker with a constant desire to stop doing it?
            (quote from Bean )

            Goal: Survival

            Comment

              #7
              Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

              thanks guys, in response to meds, no i have never tried meds and have no intention of trying anything that would show up on my medical records, it's hard to get a job in this country as it is without having 'alcoholic' on my records before I turn 20. Been doing this thing on n off for about 6 years now, without a doubt in the worst kick of my life so far, totally depressive, twitchy, uncomfortable, wide awake and totally exhuasted at the same time, spaced out, complete dream/nightmare state, pretty much constantly craving today and that is only... 30-40 hours in. day 3 is always the worst. i can hardly face leaving this room right now, and i still got to act like nothing unusuals going on around my family (nobody knows what I'm doing). so ramble over, just praying this ends soon because I don't see myself holding out much longer...
              I have faced it, a life wasted, and I am never going back there again

              To ya'll my name is inchy. I am an alcoholic - and priority number one is making it to the end of this day AF. No excuses.

              18.08.13

              Comment

                #8
                Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

                Inchy, you can get meds online without a prescription. Again, not advocating, just sayin..........Here is a link to the meds thread where they can better advise you. I got Antabuse from River Pharmacy, but I'm in the U.S., so not sure if you can order from there.

                Just post any questions you might have - the people there are very helpful and knowledgable. Here's the link:

                Topamax, Campral, Naltrexone, Baclofen, other meds - My Way Out Forums

                Comment

                  #9
                  Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

                  hi inchy
                  Ativan helped me through.. it took the edge off and helped me sleep. its called lorazipam in other areas.. stick with it

                  caper
                  caper
                  AF since Sept 2013...
                  :alf:

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

                    so, i don't knwo what to say right now. i'm shocked. by myself. i looked up some numbers, some equiavlents. i foudn out, if my partner drank to the level i do, he would ahve to be dirnking about half a bottle of vodka a night to keep up because f the difference in size and gender and... i mean my god i would go mad if he did, i would panic i would cry, i am... sick. i am really... sick knowing what i ahve done to him by being how i am.
                    I have faced it, a life wasted, and I am never going back there again

                    To ya'll my name is inchy. I am an alcoholic - and priority number one is making it to the end of this day AF. No excuses.

                    18.08.13

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

                      Are you still hanging on or are you drinking? Is there anyone whom you can talk to? Sounds like your partner has no idea of how much you are drinking? Not sure what to say to help you. But I'm here.

                      :lTDN
                      "One day at a time."

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

                        tdn, i drank tonight, i'm in a binge at the minute, i ahev work tomorrow... or today british time haha. he didn't realise how far i'd gone this time, he always drank but didn't realise it was different for a guy his size n weight to drink than it was for a girl like me... i hadn't realised n now i'm really, horrified at whats happened.
                        I have faced it, a life wasted, and I am never going back there again

                        To ya'll my name is inchy. I am an alcoholic - and priority number one is making it to the end of this day AF. No excuses.

                        18.08.13

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

                          I'm so sorry that you are drinking--you probably won't be able to work in the a.m. I'm not sure what it is you are horrified about. I hope that you can find a way to get some help from a doctor. with the amount you are drinking, it's dangerous to just stop cold turkey. Please let us know how you are doing in the morning.
                          "One day at a time."

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

                            dude, ok so i was drunk last night, probabyl wasnt' clear. i don't drink as much as this makes me sound like i drink, i was thinkign in relative terms, like, for every 2 units a woman has a man could have 3, ergo if i ahve 10, boyfriend coudl ahve 15, so me having 10 units a night is like my other half having 15 which would make me panic, but me ahvign 10 really is no major source of concern.

                            anyway I've been to work, kind of shocked to find myself stackign shelves at half 10 n realise I was actually still slightly drunk from the night before... and that i would very much like to continue with that right now for reasons unknown really.... anyway sorry for beign drunk n non sensical last night

                            xIC
                            I have faced it, a life wasted, and I am never going back there again

                            To ya'll my name is inchy. I am an alcoholic - and priority number one is making it to the end of this day AF. No excuses.

                            18.08.13

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Day 1 n beyond - inchy's blog returns

                              Day 1 redux

                              so today is day one. again. I'm sober - again and it is just egtting to the time hwere the reality of that seems to sink into my brain and body again. craving is... more than a little present but am holding it together thus far. dreading the morning and the coming days, but determined to get through...

                              xIC
                              I have faced it, a life wasted, and I am never going back there again

                              To ya'll my name is inchy. I am an alcoholic - and priority number one is making it to the end of this day AF. No excuses.

                              18.08.13

                              Comment

                              Previous template Next
                              Working...
                              X