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DUI update
well i have spent the last couple of days dealing with substance abuse counselors and lawyers. looks like this is not going away. i will most likely have 24 hours in jail, a year with interlock in my car, 14 sessions of therapy and a TON of money. husband is still not talking to me. i have been trying real hard to think of all of the positives of the situation ie not hurting myself or anyone else, wake up call, getting therapy for something that is way overdue even though it is forced and really expensive. i did end up telling my coworkers because the lying would eat me alive. they have been supportive even though i am definitely going really deep within my own head. i get extremely distant and quiet when i am sad. and i am pretty much a loner anyways. i am still scared and having bad anxiety. i can't eat and my sleep has been really restless and sweaty though i am freezing. my husband asked what my plan was and i don't know what he expects. i am doing everything i can to be proactive but my only answer is "get through each day.."I must suppress the beast within so I can find my way out of the darkness.
sober since 2/4/12Tags: None
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DUI update
Hi, SF.
Well, it is hard to have to face this, but do you not have any loss of license time? Do you have a court date? I know how much this costs. But I look at it as a blessing in disguise, and I hope you'll come to see it that way, also.
Good luck, and keep us updated.
TDN"One day at a time."
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DUI update
Star, thanks for checking back in. I was hoping that you'd post an update. You have a good ally in TDN because she's been through some similar things......including having gone to rehab, right TDN? Anyway, I think blessing in disguise is the right way to look at it.......could have been a lot worse........this too shall pass.........all those sayings
I know that staying positive is easier said than done, but we're rooting for you. I think it's great that you told your co-workers.....that has to be better than trying to hide and worrying about it. I hope your husband comes around. Hasn't he ever driven under the influence? It takes so little to get a DUI, as far as the alcohol content.........basically a couple of drinks, right?
Jail time........now that should be interesting..........maybe you can blog about it...... Just trying to help you keep a sense of humor.......surely there's a silver lining somewhere.
Do you have a family doctor or someone outside of your immediate family you could talk to....maybe just get a few anti-anxiety pills......not that you want to get into that trap, but maybe just for a couple of days? You'd have to decide for yourself if that was a good idea.....obviously we are the types who could get hooked easily on something like that......just trying to brainstorm.....
Please keep us posted Star so we don't worry.......really sending you ginormous good vibes.
:lilheart:
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DUI update
Very sorry to hear of your situation. I had a dui about 17 years ago...the very day after graduating with my master's degree. (Talk about high to low.) I had to spend a night in jail, they made my put on the orange suit, until my BF (now husband) could come and get me. Humiliating and expensive, though not nearly as much as now. I've never told my family, though some suspect, and a few friends knew, including the one who bailed me out. My only suggestion is hang onto your best friends, esp. hubby is not cooperating. They will be with you no matter what.
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DUI update
Thanks for posting the update and for sharing Star, I've never had a DUI but probably cause I've never really had a car. I feel for you and hope things with your husband become more positive. You are showing a lot of strength by making your way through this problem, remember that.
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DUI update
@starfairy
i can relate to the fact that your husband isn't talking to you. so many of my so's had no idea how to relate to me and i think most of them couldn't get past the fact that it was happening to "them". as in my disease was an inconvenience to them and even beyond that an embarrassment or stigma they had to suffer with. it's a natural reaction so give it time and most likely when he sees you getting help and working towards bettering yourself he'll start to see the bigger picture. good luck.
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DUI update
So sorry you are going through this terrible event. I know it is hard but things happen for a reason and this dui could have saved your life and others. You will have to face some hardship but when you come out the other side (and you will) you can look back on it as one heck of a learning experience.
Don't beat yourself up. People make mistakes and if it doesn't kill us we learn from them.
Keep posting. There is lots of support for you here.
Just breathe and take one day at a time. We are here for you.
R4LDon't worry, be happy!
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DUI update
Star, I'm not sure what kind of plan your husband wants, but you should get help in therapy for formulating a plan for AL. Maybe he should attend a session with you or go with you to an open AA meeting. If you can be around people who have been where are, it could you help a lot.
And good for you for telling coworkers.
Be kind to yourself. You are going through a lot.Ginger
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DUI update
thanks for all of your support and uplifting comments...
threedognight as far as my license goes i have lost it for now. i will get it back in about a week with limited driving until i am proven guilty but my lawyer says there may be complications due to what i blew. with that blow i am considered a "danger to society"....i took one of my husband's xanax last night and got a little sleep but had strange and angry dreams. i kind of wish i wouldnt have taken it cause i want my system to be clean as a whistle just in case i am drug tested or anything. but it is a catch 22 because i am so wound up i can't think. i have to come up with $600 by monday to secure my lawyer. i hate getting up in the morning and just wish for the night to come so i can get back in bed....feeling really really down...I must suppress the beast within so I can find my way out of the darkness.
sober since 2/4/12
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DUI update
You have the right attitude as far as taking one day at a time. This can't be described as anything but a nightmare at this time. It will only be in hindsight that ANY positives will seem evident to you. You are only human so allow yourself to grieve... You have to put one foot in front of the other; that's all you can do. Stay close to this forum as you have lots of support here.
It could have been any of us. The one quote I have always repeated to myself in times like this is "Guilt is a Wasted Emotion" in other words there is nothing to be gained by feeling guilty so, feel the sadness but push away the guilt, hon. Just push it out of your mind.
In a year from now, this will be a bad memory and a huge lesson learned.
Tips xoxoTipplerette
I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.
"If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
? Lao-Tzu
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DUI update
Star, my brother-in-law actually injured others while driving drunk. He went through hell on many levels, as you can imagine. He had to give his car a blow job for a long time , the whole nine yards. Would you believe he still drinks heavily? He doesn't ever drive anymore after drinking, but I would bet there are mornings he could actually fail a breathalizer. He doesn't want any kind of help and I'm sure will die on this path. Don't let that be you............I hope this is your incentive to get sober.
Is there anything you can do to take your mind off of all this? Go visit a friend this weekend? Something along that line? At the very least, maybe you can get out for a long walk.......
Sending you peace and strength. :lilheart:
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DUI update
Drunk Driving
starfairy;1258645 wrote: well i have spent the last couple of days dealing with substance abuse counselors and lawyers. looks like this is not going away. i will most likely have 24 hours in jail, a year with interlock in my car, 14 sessions of therapy and a TON of money. husband is still not talking to me. i have been trying real hard to think of all of the positives of the situation ie not hurting myself or anyone else, wake up call, getting therapy for something that is way overdue even though it is forced and really expensive. i did end up telling my coworkers because the lying would eat me alive. they have been supportive even though i am definitely going really deep within my own head. i get extremely distant and quiet when i am sad. and i am pretty much a loner anyways. i am still scared and having bad anxiety. i can't eat and my sleep has been really restless and sweaty though i am freezing. my husband asked what my plan was and i don't know what he expects. i am doing everything i can to be proactive but my only answer is "get through each day.."
Help Jacqui
If you are stopped and charged with drinking and driving - you are one of the lucky ones. Drinking and driving can ruin lives - such as a young beautiful teenage girl - is it worth it?
Star,
You have described me to a T regarding depression - quiet and distant, and can't eat. Feeling this hopeless hurts so much and there it doesn't feel like you will ever feel normal again. But you will feel normal again - this will pass - just try to remember this ok? As for your husband - unfortunately he doesn't know what this is like. it's not that easy to stop.
Maybe he should go with you when you go for counselling. Just remember - you are very lucky that you were caught.
I understand how you feel, I have been there and my message to you is - this is your time to beat this addiction. You will begin to feel normal again, just don't let this addiction define who you are.
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DUI update
Oh, I can totally relate to the whole, "hate being awake" feeling. Bloody horrible to have that be your existence day in and day out, but, when you do fix the problem, the world looks a little rosier, the sky is a little more blue, and the air just smells good. Your day will come, keep on staying strong.
Im not sure I know all the back story, but 24 months in jail seems a little harsh. My brother was convicted of multipe DUI's and did 3 weeks, interlock, and ankle bracelet.
I wish you all strength and as much positive attitude as you can muster......Im not a huge cliche guy but, hang in there, time shall help ease your suffering.
I can fully understand your husband's position, but right about now, I would think his support would be very beneficial. I am sure you have beat yourself up enough as it is, and that is only compounding the issue. Have you expressed what you are feeling to him? I pray he comes around, and soon
Good luck, you'll be in my thoughts
I caLiving on Planet Sober since 05/02/11
DAREDEVIL COOKIE MONSTER
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