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    #1

    When she's good she's very good..

    It's weird, I am thinking about years ago at school having write an essay based on the title 'When she's good, she's very good, but when she's bad, she's horrid!'

    That just seems to sum up where my life is right now. I have been drinking and smoking all week and I hate myself for it. I went 7 weeks without a cigarette and everyone was so proud of me. I have ruined all of that and I feel as though I am just a let down to everyone. As for the drinking, I didn't drink that much last night but have a bad case of the shakes and the guilt today. Square one, again. I truly feel like sh*t today. I know tomorrow will be better, but it's just hard to see it right now. :upset::upset::upset::upset:
    Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it! ~ Goethe
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    #2
    When she's good she's very good..

    Wow, that poem is everyone's description of me. Only in my family, it starts with "There was a little girl, who had a little curl, right in the middle of her forehead. And when she was good..."

    I'm at square one and feel like that too. Hold tight. Let's get through this together; so many others have. We can too!

    Comment

      #3
      When she's good she's very good..

      Hey Pocket - Do you know how many people never manage to get to 7 weeks NF? Just think, that was seven weeks without all that toxin in your body. (Can't tell you how many times my sis quit - and went back. BUT, she's about 15 years NF now).

      And....you are still here. If you were 'a faillure,' you'd be doing a disappearing act and rushing down the AL/ciggie hole. You still WANT to try - and I'm sure you will find more success because you are still here.

      We just shouldn't set our expectations so high - that success is soooo easy. It's going to be a battle = for all of us. So you've waged the first campaign, taking a breather and can charge back into the fray! Be kind to yourself and give yourself some credit for the things you have achieved!
      Tell me, what is it you plan to do
      with your one wild and precious life? - Mary Oliver

      Comment

        #4
        When she's good she's very good..

        BIG OOOOPS!!

        Read those last two messages wrong!

        Same response, just should go to Broken Halo!
        Tell me, what is it you plan to do
        with your one wild and precious life? - Mary Oliver

        Comment

          #5
          When she's good she's very good..

          Hiya Halo!

          Oy. What's all this letting other's down bullshit? I know what you mean, but we have to do this for ourselves, for US. I need to get myself on track and healthy first, before i can be any good to not only me and my true path, but to others, whether that be partners, kids, family, work etc. We can't give up the booze and/or smokes for other people. Possible, but not always healthy/sustainable. It is, and must be a very personal journey, and decision. Use others to support us on our way out, yes, but we must do this for ourselves. I can't afford to and don't worry about what anyone else is saying, doing, or thinking around me. I know what i have to do, and want to do, so i get myself a realistic plan, and go for it.

          Wishing you all the best, and don't forget the amazing AF time you have logged only recently. You are a star, so get cracking friend.

          G-bloke.

          'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

          Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

          Comment

            #6
            When she's good she's very good..

            broken halo;1278534 wrote: It's weird, I am thinking about years ago at school having write an essay based on the title 'When she's good, she's very good, but when she's bad, she's horrid!'

            That just seems to sum up where my life is right now. I have been drinking and smoking all week and I hate myself for it. I went 7 weeks without a cigarette and everyone was so proud of me. I have ruined all of that             and I feel as though I am just a let down to everyone. As for the drinking, I didn't drink that much last night but have a bad case of the shakes and the guilt today. Square one, again. I truly feel like sh*t today. I know tomorrow will be better, but it's just hard to see it right now. :upset::upset::upset::upset:
            Ruined all of what? You didn't eliminate the 7 weeks. That is something that you did and get to keep. How long has it been since you went 7 weeks without last? So just start again. Instead of looking for perfection, look to make things a little better a bit at a time.

            Comment

              #7
              When she's good she's very good..

              Thanks everyone, I needed to here this. Pocket, I am game if you are, I don't want to be horrid!

              Thanks Collie, G, Fly. The last of the ciggies went in the bin and the half bottle of wine that was left is going down the sink, right now! I am back at work today and feeling stronger. G, you are right friend, I have to and want to do these things for myself, and I am starting right now!

              Thanks again everyone. xxx
              Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it! ~ Goethe

              Comment

                #8
                When she's good she's very good..

                BrokenHalo,

                I agree with others, don't worry about what other people think of you. You are doing this for YOU. We've all had our stops and starts and disappointments, it's to be expected. I applaud you for going 7 weeks NF. I only made it 30 days (once) and am now struggling with it again. Maybe you shouldn't try to tackle too much at once (AF and NF)? Just my opinion, do what's best for YOU. I'm glad you are here and ready to start over. You really only fail when you quit trying.

                Sending you peace and strength!

                K9
                :heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:

                Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.

                Comment

                  #9
                  When she's good she's very good..

                  You really only fail when you quit trying.
                  Amen sister!

                  How do you get to Carnegie Hall? Practice baby, practice. I've been practicing my quit for a while now. This is probably my 4th or 5th time. And I'm learning more and getting better. I'm hoping that this is the time.

                  Comment

                    #10
                    When she's good she's very good..

                    Guitarista;1278744 wrote: Hiya Halo!

                    Oy. What's all this letting other's down bullshit? I know what you mean, but we have to do this for ourselves, for US. I need to get myself on track and healthy first, before i can be any good to not only me and my true path, but to others, whether that be partners, kids, family, work etc. We can't give up the booze and/or smokes for other people. Possible, but not always healthy/sustainable. It is, and must be a very personal journey, and decision. Use others to support us on our way out, yes, but we must do this for ourselves. I can't afford to and don't worry about what anyone else is saying, doing, or thinking around me. I know what i have to do, and want to do, so i get myself a realistic plan, and go for it.

                    Wishing you all the best, and don't forget the amazing AF time you have logged only recently. You are a star, so get cracking friend.

                    G-bloke.
                    Wise words, as always. How you doing G-bloke?

                    Broken, replied to PM...

                    Just lurking xx
                    You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life? Rumi

                    :lilangel:

                    Comment

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