9 weeks and faltered...

[LibraryGirl]

9 weeks and faltered...

This is from your first post WW:

"Newbie needs to quit, can't seem to, job's in trouble....

Hi all,

Been drinking practically every night for six years. Always used to manage within the range of two bottles of wine in the past, though have recently gone 'down' to five 500ml 5% cans of lager and 3 glasses of wine per night (people keep telling me that's a LOT but it doesn't seem that much to me???) I never feel addicted to it....it's just I REALLY LIKE it, and I like the comfort and avoidance of the routine.

Anyway, I know it's affecting everything, I have a 'routine' rather than cravings, I drink more to blot out the things i need to do, things that I aren't confident about, to block out anxiety, to block out prostatitis pain, to WEE normally(!) In a couple of hours, I'll be medicated, I'll have my daily, 2-hour blast of euphoria (then wake up to a hellsih day of pain n' stress tomorrow). Trouble is, it's starting to catch up with me, my once youthful looks are rapidly going ruddy and grey and my health is finally starting to suffer.



Sounds like you weren't very happy with AL. Do you really think that moderating is going to be successful for you? Why did you come to MWO if you were happy with your relationship with AL? Looking back, it seems to say it all. ^^^:l

P.S. If you weren't really trying to quit, why does your signature say you "faltered"?

[WastrelWallow]

9 weeks and faltered...

^Like I said, it's only gonna be one day!!!! The days of me hitting the booze each night are over, well over. I initially came to MWO to moderate, with maybe the intention of cutting back entirely to maybe the odd social drink here and there. I think I'm well on the road to achieving that.

I *enjoy* being sober, much more than I expected I would, I see myself as a "soberman" now. I appreciate your advice, but the fact remains I WILL be having a few beers next week(!)

(And will be a soberman afterward.)

[K9Lover]

9 weeks and faltered...

Good luck with those few beers next week. Most of us here intend to be completely alcohol-free, so it's hard for us to condone "a few beers". Sorry you're not getting the reaction you wanted. And no, this is not Sober Recovery, or AA...it's just a bunch of people that realize alcohol is not working for them anymore, and have decided to COMPLETELY abstain from it. Good luck.

[WastrelWallow]

9 weeks and faltered...

^Cheers K, though not "cheers" in that way, if ya get me!

(Will write a follow-up after the event.)

[K9Lover]

9 weeks and faltered...

WW -
No offense, but I am not intersted in the follow-up.

[RedThread12]

9 weeks and faltered...

WW - good on you for posting YOUR experience and intentions regarding AL.

Please understand that for most of us here on MWO, we ALL reached a point where an evening of drinking, planned or unplanned, did not stop with that evening. In my case, it was one beer, in an airport, after 3 years AF, that sent me head-long and breathtakingly quickly, back to where I was when I HAD to quit drinking or lose my job, my house, and not long after, die.

So apologies if our experience does not resonate with your experience. If an evening of drinking is enjoyable for you, and, as Jackie said, doesn't open the envelop of uncontrollable consumption of AL, you may actually be "in control" of your drinking and it may not still be the issue for you that brought you to this forum.

However, if that's how it turns out . . . I'll be a monkey's uncle. :H Haven't thought of that phrase in decades, and couldn't be if I wanted to be . . . perhaps a monkey's aunt?

But I sincerely hope your plan works. Keep us posted. We're here.

[panicprincess]

9 weeks and faltered...

WW I follow you. Let's remember that's the MWO book is all about using tools to help a person moderate. The author greatly emphasiizes her and her friends ability to moderate. Moderation may not be for me but can I remind everyone that this is where the whole site grew from?

We are also not here to judge but to make our mistakes and learn from them as well as others failures AND successes. I'm kind of disappointed by some of the responses here, like maybe one can't be totally honest here?

I suggest to anyone to reread the MYO book and find a solution that works for you. I'm searching for mine and while mine may be different than a lot of yours, we are all just here to offer support.

WW I appreciate hearing from you and I support you whether you choose to (like the author of My Way Out) moderate or quit altogether.

[SKendall]

9 weeks and faltered...

WW, it may sound like we are preaching but we are just trying to save you from an alcohol/hungover/unmotivated way of life to a better one. Whenever someone posts looking for help and then chronicles their progress we all are cheering and you are a new family member. We certainly don't want you to go back to a miserable life.

For about 98% of the members here moderation is impossible. The addictive brain wants you to drink more and even the liver is familiar with detoxing large amounts of alcohol - for now.

I remember you posting when the physical affects of not drinking - ruddy face were starting to happen and we were on the sideliines cheering.

The author of this MWO, books, supplements, etc. were researched by Roberta Jewell who had no financial expectations she just wanted to share her research with us, write a book and was initially working with a doctor who was also doing MWO Topomax was also recognized in the medical community as a possible help for urges, and baclofen wasn't heard of then.

Unfortunately, after some time she relapsed and it took her a very long time to acquire enough momentum to try again. Relapsing for some doesn't necessarily mean jumping back on the horse the next day, it takes enormous effort to try again. I don't know how she is now, but just hope she is healthy, Myself and many others are in deep gratitude for everything she has done. Many of us have found our way out and lifelong friendships have been formed, and we love and support each other and love newcomers.

Didn't mean this to be so long, but I'm recovering froma major surgery so it's me and my laptop!

It's your choice WW, and I wish you the best.

[WastrelWallow]

9 weeks and faltered...

^I do appreciate all your posts (though thanks for the balance of the last few posts, btw!!!) and I do understand that for many of you, complete abstinence is the best method, I applaud you all for that but like panicprincess said, what was the initial modus operandi of this place? I turned to this forum because it seemed to offer a less draconian, more 'realistic' method (to me, at least) of dealing with the subject than 'other forums'...whenever I get faced with the draconian, I have an inbuilt urge to AAsk questions, rebel, generally get a bit irked...I'm just wired that way.

(I'll also report that I have been completely abstinent since my first post on this particular thread, with ZERO problems or cravings!)

I was in a very bad place when I first started posting here...I'd been drinking much of the time due to fears of actually withdrawing from the booze. I never had any longterm withdrawals, I could have probably stopped drinking regularly way sooner than I actually did, I was just terribly worried, afraid. And I had no reason to be.

If I'm honest, I don't actually feel like an alcohol addict (bar nicotine, which I'll admit I AM vastly addicted to.) I just want to be a 'normal British bloke', one who can live the vast majority of his life drink-free, but also enjoy the odd, occasional booze-up in a pub. Now I've re-realised that sobriety isn't a problem for me, I can 'do' that, like that, I CAN be that, I AM capable of that, I am capable in general. You might tell me I can't. Great big bolshy yarblockos to you, at least let me have a ruddy try(!)

Y'all might think I'm a fool. Let me be a fool. If I'm ultimately wrong, then I'll be back here, with my tail between my legs. But what if I'm not wrong? What if such a thing is possible for some people?? Surely such an 'ideal' is to be celebrated, or at least tolerated/accepted? I come here not to be judged, more as an ongoing human experiment...whatever decisions I make, whatever outcomes I may reach...they are all for my own experience, my own research project..at the end of it all, I'm only human...and maybe RedThread WILL end up a monkey's uncle, who knows?! :H

We are all unique, we are all individuals. I see this site as a repository of a certain type of knowledge, experience, which is why it is such a fantastic place.

So, uh, yeah. Toodle pip, for a bit.

PS: Wishing you great luck in the recovery, SKendall. Good books and a laptop are all you need! And don't rush it (but make sure to get walking as soon as you can). :l

[LibraryGirl]

9 weeks and faltered...

Nice post WW. You're right, of course. It is the ultimate objective for a lot of people to be able to drink moderately. I hope you are successful and can teach me how to do it. I'm very interested in your experiences. Keep us posted!

[LostButFound]

9 weeks and faltered...

WW~
I hear yu as I'm in the same predicament today.
For whatever reason I enjoy the escape of alcohol; I'm a pretty high strung person. But yes - last night my experience was the same; a bit of confusion, not that good feeling and frankly I felt really dizzy.

[shueaddict]

9 weeks and faltered...

WW - I am curious, how are you still feeeling about that episode? Would you repeat it?

Of course, I was curious too to see if I can mod, to get "just a little high" after some time AF. I guess it is normal ... Maybe I did not have a good modding plan or maybe I am just to sensitive to AL - but every time I allowed myself a wee one, I was back on the full bottle in a matter of days. That's just me.

So how about you ?

I am one who tried and failed to moderate ... the decision to finally just abstain took me a while to come to ... and it is fairly recent. The acceptance of my predicament did not happen overnight.

[patrice]

9 weeks and faltered...

Hi

A very interesting original post which got lots of rather judgemental replies. Good on you WW for being honest and sticking to your guns: re your recovery and your approach to alcohol and how it has dramatically changed over the past 9 weeks (AF fantastic!!)

I have been on this site for the longest time and have had great difficulty staying off the daily booze.. its been a yo yo situation for so long now until 3 months ago when I decided I would only drink on a Friday night. Since that decision, I have only ever had a great bottle of red wine on a Friday night as I'm cooking dinner, with dinner and after my son goes to bed. I enjoy it a lot but never ever drink on any other day of the week.. I feel a bit hazy on a saturday morning but that is fine becuase I have nothing to do on a Saturday morning and my son wakes up late..

I consider myself a major success over alcohol because for years I drank a bottle a night.. now only once a week and only on a Friday. This has become my routine and I'm fine with that.

I haven't posted here about this because of the very same posts I am seeing, which would have made me feel bad even though I feel good about reining in my alcohol consumption to the point of being way under the mimimum guidelines

Each to their own and whatever works for you... all approaches should be accepted as being valid and real attempts to bring our alcohol comsumption under control or to stop it altogether

Take Care all
Patrice

[drinkingal]

9 weeks and faltered...

thanks for posting patrice. As someone trying to cut down on their al consumption gradually, posts like yours are really inspirational as I just don't feel I'm the sort of person who can or will give up al completely and i honestly believe for some people there are other ways out. I think you are incredibly successful that you can keep your alcohol to such a manageable level. :goodjob: and I hope to see more of your posts for those of us trying to drink more moderately so we can gain some insight from your experience