I am here again

[mauritiusdodo]

I am here again

Hi and thank you running4 and berner I do feel proud of myself that I made it through the last three nights, I realised out and about today how many triggers I have that make me think of alcohol, an off licence i have never been to, the sun shining, the fact it is Thursday and almost the weekend!!!!! I really need to re-programme my brain, I am hoping that my hypnotherapy cd will help and I downloaded a subliminal recording for stress last night so going to make a start with listening to that later. Had a lovely morning at the play gym, just had lunch and prepping a casserole for dinner later, I am off to slimming world at seven so will be eating late (gotta be as light as possible for weigh in )

[mauritiusdodo]

I am here again

lil.michelle;1299975 wrote: Hunni , read your old posts... Print the off and stick them where you store your wine... You've had some god awful experiences thanx to al, I'll never forget the one when you were round your sisters. It's time hunni, to give yourself a break. No more drinking. Every time you relapse you have to start right back at day one again, it doesn't make it easier. Infact after every relapse, it's harder as you have more pressure on yourself. Come on hunni, you're stronger then this!

Thanks lil michelle, I know I was thinking about the incident at my sisters only yesterday!! I don't actually keep any wine in the house (or any AL for that matter) I need to stick something on my bank card to deter me I think!

[mauritiusdodo]

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I am as i thought a pathetic excuse for a non-alcoholic and as such have signed up for some therapy with a counsellor,

[K9Lover]

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Are you OK Mauri? I hope you are not leaving us....

[Enough!]

I am here again

Mauri... Please don't stop posting. It was really hard coming back when I " took a break" from MWO. We are here for you at Conquering....
E!

[FlyAway]

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You are not pathetic and you are worthy! Please don't leave us.

[mauritiusdodo]

I am here again

I have so many issues I don't know where to start I think AL is just my way of coping with a life I find too difficult to handle, I feel ridiculous as most people would probably give their right arm to be in my shoes but I hate my life at the moment, I feel useless and hopeless and I don't know what to do :upset::upset::upset: I drank a bottle and a half last night and bitterly regret it today I feel like I let everyone down mostly my hubby who came home and told me he was proud of me for getting 3 Af days under my belt :upset: I need to go get ready and take DS to preschool but I will post later, I am sorry for being a pain I am trying to change I really am and I am sooooooo grateful to you all for listening to me and supporting me thank you x

[Rainyday]

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Mauri - Have you tried taking vitamins? What about a hyponosis CD? I've been mingling with both, and although I haven't stopped drinking yet, I think I'm only drinking because 1. It's a 23-year old habit (since I was 15) and therefore it's more of a psycholigical thing (I need to be more committed to my hypnosis CD which I bought online through Flora Clinics in Virginia) and 2. My husband of 10 years plus 5 years of dating has been my drinking "buddy" and he's having trouble quitting as well.

Anyway - I think the vitamins and hypno have helped to an extent. I just need to figure out what to do about the two issues above.

[K9Lover]

I am here again

Mauri,
You are NOT a pain, and I really hope you keep posting. I'm sorry you're having a hard time and having issues. Don't compare yourself to anyone else, here or anywhere else. I know that I personally like hearing from you, so I hope you stay. It's not easy, I know how HARD this battle is. I hope you are ok today, and I hope to hear from you soon.
K9

[mauritiusdodo]

I am here again

starting over again today not making any great statement or claims or anything, just trying my darndest to not drink anything that will make me ill !!!

[mauritiusdodo]

I am here again

K9Lover;1300584 wrote: Mauri,
You are NOT a pain, and I really hope you keep posting. I'm sorry you're having a hard time and having issues. Don't compare yourself to anyone else, here or anywhere else. I know that I personally like hearing from you, so I hope you stay. It's not easy, I know how HARD this battle is. I hope you are ok today, and I hope to hear from you soon.
K9

thank you - you are a great role model to me, I envy your strength and hope to be as successful as you on the road to AF-dom thanks for fighting my corner it means a lot to me

[patricia]

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Hi M, just keep coming back. For goodness knowable many times I am back again. Sometimes I think I'll go back on when I have a day under my belt - that is usually when I fail. I'm now onday 2 again but last night just before I put light out I read a post from k9 asking me if I could hear her and to stay close to these boards. K9 is in California and I'm in south of England but the fact that someone so far away wants to help just helped. Your pattern sounds a lot like mine . . Good luck px

[patricia]

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Omg you can tell I'm posting on my iPhone - better put my glasses on next time lol xx

[K9Lover]

I am here again

Hi Patricia and Mauri!

I'm glad to see you both posting. Patricia, put those glasses on girl! LOL Seriously, you do a good job posting from your phone, I don't even attempt it! My phone likes to make up words I've never even heard of! If I posted from my phone ya'll would think I was drinkin!

Mauri - I think of you a lot and hope you are ok. I know you've been wanting this for a long time. You CAN do it. Don't pressure yourself though, when it's time, it will happen. It took me YEARS to get to this point. I seriously have about 7 years worth of calendars where I "tracked" my drinking...that's how long I knew I had a problem. "Normal" people don't mark down days they didn't drink, they don't even think about it! So how have you been lately Mauri? I haven't seen a post in a little while (or did I miss it?). I hope you are ok and know that I do think of you and wish you strength (you too Patricia!).

Keep posting, I need to know how you are! :h

K9

[SAUSAGE]

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Hi Patricia and Mauri
Great to see you back, stay close and keep posting. Without this site Incould barely string a few AF days together but somehow, with determination and the support of everyone on here, I'm on day 75.

Never give up.