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[wenzalc]

See.. this is what I mean. I will have the determination to embark but never the discipline to continue. My seeing the hypno seems to be not working. And that famous shrink I went to say he can't help me much and only referred me to AA!! I'm back to drinking now. And it's the hard liqor once again. For almost 4 nights in a roll this time. Yesterday night I almost finish the whole bottle. Someone pls tell me what I should do now... I dun think I can take this much any longer..

[Paddy]

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I know how you feel. It can be really frustrating. I must say, I also tried shrinks. I'm not into the hypno thing. It scares me a bit. But I AM into Topa. And I must say it works quite well. I am still drinking. But much less than I used to. I'm on 50 mgs a day. I started off at 25 mgs for a week, and I expect to go up to 100 mgs. Have a look under the Meds discussion site here. Topamax is the medication to look for.

Hope that helps.

[Popeye]

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Hi wenzalc
The first thing you must do is lay off the drink for a while, so that you can think properly. It may seem futile just now but I know that you don't want to carry on this way. I'm sure there will be others along with more useful advice. Hang in there!

[AAthlete]

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I know it's hard, but you need to approach it one day at a time (just for today, I'm not going to drink).

Have you spoke to a doc about Campral or Topa? May be options that can help you get started down the right path. They could also help point you to inpatient/outpatient programs that may be beneficial.

Hang in there - we're all sending positive thoughts your way...

[wwbarb]

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It is hard - sometimes it sucks.

Seeing a hypno once a week did not work for me. I need the daily tapes - the whole package. Let's face it - a shrink is just a person with his/her own opinions - if they are an advocate of AA, they are an advocate. Even Dr. Phil gets stuck on his own opinions and has too many "canned" answers. Until our underlying issues are addressed, we can't fix what's wrong.

Hang it there - it is worth the hard work.

[wenzalc]

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thanks guys... u all have been truly encouraging. I tried last night without drinking and was using so many detox patches on my reflexological parts on the soles of the feet. GOsh, u shld have seen how much toxins in my body! All the almost 30 patches I used on the soles were so wet and dark!. I stopped drinking ytd and rely on sleeping pills. Sleep like shit cos I cna't sleep but definitely feel much better abiout myself the next morning! My family and frens have been also very encouraging but as for the shrink, I was a little appalled when he smirked at the fact that Topax can help withdrawal and craving: he surely hasn't update his medical system much. So let;s not talk abt campral or topax from him:thanks:

[SKendall]

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Hi Wenz, wanna meet me in chat?

[SKendall]

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I know it is really really hard.

This is war on alcohol and we have to arm ourselves with all of the MWO tools. Have you read the book, are you taking any supplements?

Hilary

[Rocky]

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Wen...

This can work for you! I agree with SKendall ARM yourself with all the tool here. Some folks are able to do parts and pieces of the program and succeed...but some depending on all the variables of drink, stress, circumstances, other support or no support need every tool to stick the stake in the heart of old alcohol

We are here to support each other... keep coming back and reading and asking questions...

Blessing to you!

[lushy]

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Wen, I hope you are feeling better!!! I have never heard of detox patches but just looked them up online. Do they really seem to work for you? Where do you order them from? Very interesting indeed......

[InnerStrength]

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Hi Wen
when I talked to my doctor about Topa, she clearly acknowledged that it can and has been useful in her experience for drinking. So despite your doctor's smirk, some doctors do acknowledge its usefulness in this regard.
That being said, when I first joined this site, I was at a point that I could not go longer than 2 days without drinking. COuld not do it. I would, for example, want to do those 7 day detox kits or 14 day detox kits and I would be in the store and then I would put them back because I would realize there was no way I could stop drinking for that long. SO there was no point doing them. I mean 1 day AF back then, unless hung over, was a struggle. Two days was terrible. By day 3 I always caved. Things are SO different now. Even though I have had some trouble getting back on track after the holidays (I was also off the topa and its taken me a while to get back up to the dose I need to be at), I am now on day 7 AF and I feel great. I plan to continue going AF as long as I can. Prior to Christmas when I was on topa, I was pretty much AF in October (I think I had maybe 4-5 drinks that whole month or something?) and in November I was really moderate too - up until the end of december when I decided I didnt "need' the topa and I was having some tiredness etc.
I'm telling you - I really think the topa helps. However, its not a magic bullet. YOu really need to want to do this as well.
Well, that is my two (long) cents anyways.
Let us know how you are doing
Hugs
Jen

[SK8RGRL]

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re; why why why

wenzalc;94052 wrote: See.. this is what I mean. I will have the determination to embark but never the discipline to continue. My seeing the hypno seems to be not working. And that famous shrink I went to say he can't help me much and only referred me to AA!! I'm back to drinking now. And it's the hard liqor once again. For almost 4 nights in a roll this time. Yesterday night I almost finish the whole bottle. Someone pls tell me what I should do now... I dun think I can take this much any longer..

i'm strugglin too. Was doin real well, but woda ya know i'm right back to square 1. I'm useless,just love the way it blacks everythin out. dont think theres any help for me

[Popeye]

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Hello maxineann1

You are not useless. You're just struggling.
You're also not at square 1. If you were doing well before, then you know how to do it, so you must be at least at square 2.
Please don't put yourself down because you can't do it all at once. Nobody can.
Also, please give yourself credit for knowing to ask for help when you need it.
That is what brought us all here in the first place.
Again...you are not useless!
Please keep trying.

[rivergirl]

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You are not useless- Gosh Popeye is SO right. Everything you read and every time you post tells your brain you want to quit. Inundate yourself with material and vibes to help you go one day - then another... Make learning and trying your priority and NEVER give up. Being here tells us you want to quit. Wanting to is all it takes to start. Read all the back posts and threads and find the drink tracker and start to make a place in your brain that says - you CAN do it.

I used to say that I had had such a hard childhood and and had such a stressful job that alcohol was medicine for me - medicine I needed to function with all the things that had happened to me.... That was a lie. Truly a lie that the alcoholic rivergirl believed and tried to get me to believe.

I know now it is not true. You also know it is not true - You can do it - you can do it for today- keep posting - you are a jewel - a treasure and we all want you to shine.

Rivergirl

[Beaches]

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Hello Wen and Max
Just hang in there. Sometimes we go back to the black and dark places. Just please remember that you don't have to stay there, you have the power and the courage to get out. I have said before that I have fallen vicitm to a slide and it has hit me without me even knowing it was coming. I was going along thinking everything was going great. I was moderating, feeling great and then started drinking more and more. We all end up there. We all fall. We pick ourselves up. We brush off. We come here and we ask for help. You have done that.
Keep coming back. Don't be discouraged. You are human. Each day you will get stronger. You will learn new ways to cope and new ways to become AF. Even if it's just an hour at a time. Just stay here and keep posting.
I wish you both the best of luck. I was in your place when I came here. I was desperate. It does get better, I promise you. It does get better.

Beaches