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[I want to be done]

Hi everyone! I want to start by saying that I never imagined to find such a warm and incredibly encouraging site.

I have come to the reality that's have a toxic relationship with alcohol. I hope that at some point I will be able to be a social drinker and have complete control. But, deep down inside I feel that ultimately I will have to cut all ties, so to speak. My drinking has gotten out of control. It's ruining so many aspects of my life I once found priorities, which makes me sad that it is making someone I don't want to be.

I have read about the program and am serious about getting started. I have ordered the supplements and hypnotic CD's, along with the book. Can anyone advise me on their experiences with ordering toperimate online? Which seems more effective... Antabuse or toperimate?

I hope to continue posting and also for some insight on my situation.

Thank you!

[Over It!]

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Hello and welcome,

For me a combination of the two has been an outstanding success. I am now 40 days AF.

I take Topa at night and I am also on an antidepressant (AD) for a PTSD incident that I suffered 18 months ago and which I take in the morning.
I have read the books and they have been helpful but I havent purchased the cd's as yet but I would like to eventually.
But, for me, the biggest help has been AB (Antabuse). I know that I absolutely cannot drink if I have that in my system because it will make me extremely ill - and I dont want that! I statred off by taked 1/2 tablet morning and evening and now I take it 1/2 every other day or more if I know I am going to be in the presence of AL. It will stay in your system for about 2 weeks after you have taken it, I know this from experience! :-(

This site has been invaluable because for the first time in my lfe I have come across people who are just like me and have had similar or even worse experiences and I can relate to them. I have had many words of encouragement and sage advice which came exactly when I needed it the most. Above all, there is no judgement.

Good luck - I hope you achieve your golas.

xx

[Over It!]

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Sorry, that last word should obviously have been GOALS. (Tee hee)

[Doggygirl]

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:welcome:!! Good to have you on board. I started with all the same tools you mentioned - book, CD's and supplements. I never used the meds so can't help you there - but many here have used those tools to great success.

AL was toxic in my life too. There was a time when I thought I would like to drink again. I found out the hard way that doesn't work for me. Now I look back and can't imagine why I would want to drink any way. IT'S TOXIC. It was difficult at first to stop drinking, that's for sure. But I would trade my rich, full, sober life for anything now.

Good luck to you!!! If I can do it, you can do it too.

DG

[Lavande]

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Hello & welcome I want!

MWO is a great place, lots of us have found success using the tools here, you can too!
I didn't use the meds either, not everyone does.

Please drop in the Newbies Nest thread for onging support.
Wishing you the best!

Lav

[kapone]

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Ahoy there, Wanty - can I call you that?? I think your name here is beautiful and sums it up: I want to be done!!! Well, honey, you CAN be done !! My warm welcome goes out to you - just keep reading and posting and take things slowly...'One day at a Time' is my motto...along with 'don't pick up the FIRST drink' (because it's that all devouring first sip - for me anyway - that seems to set off the 'phenomenon of craving', leading to more and more)...

Blessing to you, and looking forward to seeing you around here

[Trixiebelle]

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Hi Wanty (hehe)

All I can say is I tried Baclofen and couldn't keep my eyes open, it makes you extremely tired. I got a bit scared taking meds without a Dr monitoring me, so threw them out.

Good Luck

[I want to be done]

Need advise

Thank you Overit, doggie girl, lavande, kapone, and trixiebelle for all of your replies and suggestions!

Overit- thanks for your advice. I'm sorry to hear of your experience, but admire your incredible strength! Antabuse maybe the way to go for me considering that I really don't trust myself, especially here in the beginning.

Doggie girl- yes, i have thought it would be impossible to completely live without AL. I am in my early thirties, single and have fairly recently moved to a new city for work. So, obviously my social life revolved around drinking.mwhat used to be something that kept me occupied when I was bored, turned into a crutch... Kind of like a friend that I could always count on being there when I was lonely/bored. Now, it has evolved to drinking everynight... Shamely, probably a bottle maybe more. It is ruining me! I consider myself somewhat functional because I never miss work, i don't allow the physical effects to effect my productivity. But, I'm becoming sooo tired. So even though I realize that I have to gain control, it scares me to death to quit.

Lavande- thank you! I will definitely check out the tool box.

Kapone- l like it! I may have to coin that

Trixiebelle- i definitely can't take anything that makes me tired!

Thanks again guys for all of your welcomes and encourgement.. Like kapone said I will have to keep taking it one day at a time.

'Wanty'

[I want to be done]

Need advise

And sorry for the typos!

FYI- I didn't include that I started AL on Wednesday. Felt great on thursday and Friday. I broke down last night and had some wine. Yes, after i posted for the first time. I wanted to be honest. I already have Antabuse but have been afraid to take it considering that it is the first commitment to being AL. I am draging my feet trying to debate between toperimate and Antabuse usage, when I already have one of the tools in front of me. Im diving in.. I will start antabuse today. Thanks over it!

[Over It!]

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Wanty,
Good decision BUT - you know that you cannot drink with that in your system, right? It WILL make you ill so dont try to test it, You could end up in hospital.
Like you, I drank over a bottle a night. It became a regular occurrence and eventually I was unable to function properly.

As my signature states I am now 40 days AF and I am so healthy and happy. No daily hangovers, low self-esteem and self loathing. I am able to get so much more done and my relationships have improved markedly. Believe me, being AF is so worth it. I wish that I had done it when I was in my 30's.

Continued Good Luck Wanty.
XX

[I want to be done]

Need advise

Hi Overit!
Yes I know that I can not drink while taking it. It is a path I will have to take. That is awesome about being 40 days AF! It gives me something to look forward to and some inspiration. Like you some I relationships are suffering because of AL, and I can't let that happen. bthanks again for your support and congratulations on your success!

Wanty

[I want to be done]

Need advise

Hi Overit!
Yes I know that I am unable to drink while taking the Antabuse. I feel it is the best path for me. That is awesome about being 40 days AF! It gives me inspiration and something to look forward to. Thank you for your support and congratulations on your success!

Wanty

[K9Lover]

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Hi Wanty
I just wanted to welcome you! I have been on Antabuse for a long time, so if you have any questions please feel free to ask. Antabuse and MWO have literally saved my life. We're glad you're here with us. Keep posting and reading, you can do this!
K9