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[WineSucks]

Well, its been a long tine since I've posted and I have to admit, things haven't been going so well. I'm not sure what happened, I was doing okay with some AF time under my belt and then for some reason I thought I could control my drinking.....well, I was wrong! What a rough couple of months it's been!

I made it to work today, hungover and pissed at myself and decided that I can't take it anymore and I need to do whatever it takes to stop this insanity. I can't do this to myself anymore and I'm to the point that I don't care what anymone thinks.....I need to get and stay sober.

I plan on trying to log on to this website daily to get support and I'm reading a book called "Unwasted", which is pretty good. I'm wondering if I need more help than this. I've tried AA and didn't care for it too much but I think I need some extra help. Any suggestions are appreciated.

I'm glad to be back here, I just wish it were under different circumstances.

[FlyAway]

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I'm so glad to see you back here!

Have you tried supplements before? I had a lot of luck with L-Glutamine. I haven't tried kudzu but I know lots of people here have used it. I also loved the book Kick The Drink Easily by Jason Vale. I can't remember if you read that or not, but it helped me immensely.

[K9Lover]

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WS -

I am glad you're back! You know, you're not the first (or the last) to discover they can't control their drinking. I thought I could too...fast forward 10 years and I was drinking 12+ beers a night...with the intention every night to cut down! The thing is, after 5-6 beers all my "good" intentions went out the window. That's why I can't moderate.

The good news is, this may be exactly what you needed. I was like you, where I just could NOT take the insanity anymore. I had called in sick for the umpteenth time, laid in my bed and cried all day long, and just KNEW I couldn't do this anymore.

Definitely check in here every day...the understanding and experience is amazing. I don't know what I'd do without the help and support of these wonderful people.

Take care of yourself today, and please stick close to us! I'm glad you're back.

K9

[WineSucks]

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Thanks Fly and K9Lover for the support.

Fly - I'll try anything so I'm buying a big bottle of L-Glut....how much are you taking? I haven't read Jason's book yet but I read Allen Carr's.

K9 - Sad to say but this might be what I needed. I am done with this....I can't stand the way I feel anymore. I'm curious....what's the 30 day shred?

[FlyAway]

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WS I took 1000mg in the morning, 1000mg with lunch, 1000mg around 5pm, and if I got an urge to drink later I'd take another 1000. It helps with sugar cravings too. Vale's book is similar to Carr's, but I think it's better.

[briseus]

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Hey WS,

I know that I had crazy cravings for chocolate the first little while AF because of all the sugar our bodies are no longer ingesting for the alcohol.
So I would stock up on some yummy teas and good chocolate.

Something that has helped me in the past was AVRT. I am not sure if you have heard of it but it is quite interesting and I read pretty much anything I could get my hands on. Still do.
The book is by Jack Trimpey. I myself am not a big AA'er so I can relate.

The first week was definitely tricky but it did get easier as time went on.

I am in the same boat as you now though. Back to drinking and working on my day 1.

I hate this booze thing.

If you did it before you can do it again. Keep going and there is a tun of support here for sure.

*Briseus*

[WineSucks]

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Thanks Briseus.......I have heard of AVRT I'll look into it. I cant't take feeling the way I did today anymore. I felt like crying and or screaming because I'm so frustrated with this. There has to be a way out of this mess!

[Destiniey]

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Welcome back WineSucks and Briseus. It is a very vicious cycle and is extremely exhausting. I am back on day 1 (again) too. I have a good feeling about it this time around...I was actually able to pass 2 liquor stores today and I just kept right on driving. Ok...well...I went to Sonic and pigged out on a double bacon cheeseburger instead! Ha! I have found coming on here as much as I possible can in a day helps. There is a comfort in knowing that you're not alone! Best of luck to you both and hopefully we can beat this beast together!

[briseus]

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Hey WineSucks - how are you doing?

Destiniey - whatever works! I pig out too when the cravings get crazy. Better then drinking!

[WineSucks]

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Hey everyone....I'm doing pretty good today (better than yesterday). I re-read the Toolbox last night. I also read some posts that helped as well. I have a mixture of feelings ranging from determination, hope but also fear.....I don't want to relapse again....that's what scares me the most. I just want this monkey off my back so I can focus on other things!

[K9Lover]

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Hi WS -

30 Day Shred is a workout DVD led by Jillian Michaels (from The Biggest Loser). She's a psycho, but I love her. lol We have a thread around here somewhere called "30 day shred"...check it out!

K9

Here ya go:

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...red-64267.html

[Turnagain]

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Welcome back WS!!!! Coming here again is a huge step toward finding that freedom. I am not going to sugarcoat this....the first days...maybe even weeks.... are tough. This addiction has changed our body/brain functions to the point where it is dependent on that fix of alcohol. BUT you CAN get through that detox stage. The advice above from those who have 'been there - done that' is great.

L-Glut really does help with the cravings AND it also helps heal the stomach lining which has been terribly ravaged by alcohol. I personally like the powder. It gets into your system more quickly. L-glut is best taken on an empty stomach...at least 30 minutes before eating.

For me, the final key to freedom came with a profound decision: I completely accepted that my body can no longer tolerate any alcohol. Not a drop. Not ever. I can remember being so afraid to commit to that - but after I finally did....it was amazingly liberating.

You WANT to be free that means you CAN do it. Stick close.....read...learn...post and let us know what we can do to help you succeed!

[shueaddict]

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Dear WS, your first post was what got me to thissite in the first place.

I remember our journey to the 30 days, you made it after a few takes, well... It took me a few more tries and a few more spectacular fails. I finally got to the place where my mind does not want to drink anymore but my body pretends that it did not get the memo yet.

Forget the fear to fail, just focus on ODAT.

I have been in that cocky place where I thought I could control this ... Only to fail over and over again.

Take good care of yourself and read twice everything that Turnagain writes. She's helped me tremendously.

You're here, that's the main thing.

Big big hug, I missed you, you know.

[WineSucks]

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Well, it's Day 3 and no desire at all for AL...but I've been here many times before. I started taking L-Glut 3-4 times a day. I feel lots better today both physically and mentally.

Turn and Shue....it's good to hear from you again.

I plan on checking in every day.....I appreciate all the support!

K9 - I'll have to check out the 30 day shred!

[K9Lover]

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WS - Great job on 3 days! I think days 3-4 are the hardest, so you are almost there. Get through them and you'll feel much better. Good plan to check in every day...I do, and it keeps me grounded! I'm thinking of you!
K9