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finally I'm serious about giving up!

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    finally I'm serious about giving up!

    Hi all,

    i'm a 27 year old Irish fella working and mainly drinking in the city of HK!

    ive 100% had enough of it now after a number of events which have included getting on the wrong side of triads in a place called Wan Chai, for kicking a bathroom door in.. ended up with busted ribs and a cut eye.. my good friend who is quite innocent got dragged into it also and nearly never spoke with me again! I drank so much i was on a different planet!

    another time i put myself in hospital for cooking while drunk and gave myself serious food poisoning, was in hospital for a week.. walked through kings cross in sydney pulled my trousers down in middle of the street and proceeded to walk through local biker gangs! who were very p*ssed off to say the least... yesterday i went for lunch and never bothered going back to work, i went straight to the pub and by 7pm couldnt stand straight due to downing so many jager bombs and told a friends girlfriend she is lovely and there is a party for two back at my place! then came back to my girlfriends place, fell asleep on the floor while drooling all over myself!

    I can go days without drinking and can actually be ok some of the time its just when its BAD world war 3 breaks out and ruins all the good work ive done! but its definitely taking more of a hold, i used to be so fit, i'm now unfit, saw a pic of myself today, actually look much older than 27 so its all starting to take its toll on my body... today i picked up a cup and i though my whole body was gonna seize up on me! my gf took a video and pictures of the state of me last night.. best thing ever because normally i'd just have a black out and think "if i cant remember it it didnt happen!"


    My mother had a very bad drink problem and was in and out of rehab, my grandfather dank a big bottle of whiskey each day until he fell of his seat mumbling about "life"

    So i've saw in me what i've seen in both my grandfather and mother, drink has also ruined pretty much every relationship i've ever had with a girl...my last gf met me on hike because i decided thats what normal people do but she went on the hike to meet a "normal" guy who does hikes and is generally an altogether person and asked when she broke up with me was me going on a hike a big charade? because guys who are the hiking type aint like me going party every night, the poor girl nearly had a nervous breakdown dealing with me... my gf before that left australia in tears after being with each other for five years! got badly heartbroken another time because the girls mother didnt approve.. in fairness what mother would? i always justified it in my head saying i need to drink in my job as i run a company and need to take out clients etc and once the business was doing well who cares? but now i've noticed im going in later, im not as on top of things like i used to be... i know guys who were millionaires and lost everything over the years to drinking and fucking up their lives!

    So i need to make sure I put a stop to this asap.. last night has really shocked me! ive always known in the back of my mind this day would come...

    any advice is much appreciated... my whole life revolves around the pub so i better get some hobbies!

    P

    #2
    finally I'm serious about giving up!

    Wow, wow, wow Patrick!! Thank God you made it here!!:l:l This is absolutely the right time for you to quit. You are headed down a very wide path of total destruction, but you need to turn around, pack up your gear and head toward that straight but narrow path of soberness and happy fulfilled life. It is not a path many take because it is not the easiest one, but those who do are the happiest.

    Please visit the Tool Box for help in making a plan. As they say, if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. Also, you're just in time for Boot Camp! Head over to the Newbie's Nest and you will find a group of people just starting out on a 30-day challenge.

    Good luck to you, and I wish you great success! Read all you can on all the forums that interest you, and continue posting every day, all day if you want.

    :welcome:

    LG


    "I like people too much or not at all."
    Sylvia Plath

    Comment


      #3
      finally I'm serious about giving up!

      Hi Patrick! You're one smart person to be recognizing you have a problem while you're still so young. Without AL, you will have your whole life ahead of you and be free to do whatever YOU want to do and be whatever YOU want to be, not what AL makes you become! I wished I had recognized the signs much sooner than I did. Actually, that's not really an accurate statement, so let me rephrase it. I wished I had not ignored the signs when I regcongized them early on.

      We all have to find our way through this but what worked for me was following the MWO program--diet, exercise and supplements--and adopting a zero tolerance policy for myself, no ifs, ands or buts about it. I knew if I allowed myself to slip once, there would be nothing that would stop me from slipping again, and again, and again, and I wanted off the hampster wheel once and for all. I had finally had enough of history repeating itself.

      My best advice to you is to "KNOW THYSELF" and what your triggers are. If you are triggered being around drinking, then don't go there. It won't be forever, but it does need to be NOW, if going there is going to set you back to where you don't want to be. It seems like such a sacrifice in the beginning, but trust me, 3.5 year later, I don't feel I missed out on anything during those early days of sobriety. What I do remember is all the days of my life I gave to AL that I will never ever be able to get back.

      There are no do-overs in life, but if I had to do it all over, I would not allow AL to steal one precious moment.

      Best of luck to you in your journey! Just imagine how wonderful your life can be.

      Sheri
      AF since 3/16/09
      NF since 3/20/07

      Comment


        #4
        finally I'm serious about giving up!

        Patrick2012,
        I couldn't help but laugh a little at some of your "adventures" but like you said, they are ruining your life and being the drunk guy quickly becomes NOT funny after a while. My advice to you is simple. Get back into the gym. It is so rewarding to pump iron, spin, run or whatever floats your boat. This will start some self esteem building. Next, make some goals for yourself. 30 days is a great goal but start with a 3 day goal, then build from there. It really is a day by day, situation by situation deal.

        Take some time off from social events. Go to bed early and be the first one at work to kick some ass and these little things will start your progress. You recognize that although you are still in your twenties, you are out of college now and are in a professional atmosphere. Good luck to you, you are in the right place and your honesty and being so open about your experiences will be your biggest ally.

        Butterbean:welcome:
        Butterbean

        Start date: Sunday June 17, 2012
        30 days AF, DONE!
        Next goal, stay dry!

        Comment


          #5
          finally I'm serious about giving up!

          cheers for the messages of support! there are a few crazy stories i left out, for another time maybe!

          amazing how i met my good friends for breakfast this morning and told them i'd no longer be going to "the local" for pints as its no good for me and honestly dont want it anymore..

          just got a text from one of them saying "the totty is great down here your missing on good times!"

          reckon i'll have to cross out a few friends for a while!

          Comment


            #6
            finally I'm serious about giving up!

            Hey Patrick. Did you make it thru last night ok? About your friends: it takes longer for some people to get to the same realization about drinking, and some never do. I remember one or two of my friends quitting drinking back when I was in my late 20s, early 30s, and I thought they were crazy, lol. I didn't get it at all. Just don't be offended if your friends don't "get it" either.

            LG


            "I like people too much or not at all."
            Sylvia Plath

            Comment


              #7
              finally I'm serious about giving up!

              Hi Patrick and welcome to MWO, if you read round the forum you will find lots of different people doing different things all with the same goal in mind. To sort themselves out form the destruction of drinking. If you stop now you have a whole lot of life ahead of you that can be fantastic, if you dont you will just get more of the same gradually getting worse so you are doing well by wanting to stop.

              You say you already have times without drink so that gives you a bit of a head start because you know how to stop already. Try and make a plan of how you are going to go about staying sober. Write it down so you can see what you want to do and what you want from life. Also note what problems you think you might incure along the way, cravings, friends, party's, works drinks, wine in the fridge get the idea, when you can see what the problems are likely to be you can work round them.

              Above all, now your here I hope you stay, keep posting and keep reading, ask as many questions as you want, big or small.

              Comment


                #8
                finally I'm serious about giving up!

                Hi Patrick. You're about the age of my granddaughter (who just got her MBA by the way - and she doesn't drink). Me, on the other hand, as a grannie, have been drinking way too much for many many years and have spoiled lots of opportunities to better myself that I regret now.

                You are young so for heaven sake recognize this wake up call you've given yourself. When friends text you with what a wonderful time they are having try to remember the last time you puked yourself - they won't have seen that will they? Or try to see yourself in the morning not even remembering the wonderful time you had! What a waste eh? It's really sad that you won't be able to have those great times wrapped around booze but you know, many many people are able to have good times in life without it. It seems hard to think about that now. Sounds so boring - sitting with a bunch of losers, grannies sipping tea, not out there chasing the hotties, and everyone getting tanked up and hooking up and having a blast....but you know in your heart that that is not what happens. What really happens is you end up on the floor having made a complete pig of yourself!

                So glad you are here! You will carve out a wonderful sober life for yourself. It will be fun - you will be aware of it - you will remember it!!! And the woman of your dreams will be there with you!! And she will look up to you and respect you too. That's what your new sober life will be if you start NOW. God bless you and protect you as you go through the struggles ahead.
                Ask yourselves, would you rather be a non drinker with an occasional desire to drink or a drinker with a constant desire to stop doing it?
                (quote from Bean )

                Goal: Survival

                Comment


                  #9
                  finally I'm serious about giving up!

                  Good for you! There is life on the other side. The only case....when I can say the grass is actually greener

                  Comment


                    #10
                    finally I'm serious about giving up!

                    Hi Library girl, yeah was ok yesterday but must say feeling agitated today, think i need to get to the gym!

                    thanks everyone else, no idea how great it is to hear from people who've been there done that and know its the right thing!

                    Comment


                      #11
                      finally I'm serious about giving up!

                      Well done Patrick, keep posting and reading and if you want this you will get there. You wont have to avoid social situations for ever, it doesnt bother me now when other people drink I have a way better time without it and can actually get on with people so much better now I am able to hold a conversation

                      Comment

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