How many of you have had health problems?
Wow some wake up call!! I wish you well on your AF journey and hope you are staying strong :l
Wow some wake up call!! I wish you well on your AF journey and hope you are staying strong :l
kentia;1349532 wrote: As you can see I have been a member here for a while but have not posted - I used to come here late at night after drinking too much and cry as I read posts and not be able to type anything even vaguely coherent. I felt trapped and useless and I hated myself. I felt I was dying inside. I had even given up on trying to go a day or two without drinking as I had previously failed every attempt I had made.
I am 50, and I have been drinking socially since I was 15, however in the last 8 yrs I had really increased my intake. In the last few years I have been drinking up to 2litres of cask wine a night. I have long passed the time of hangovers and vomiting, and have simply felt a little foggy in the morning.
Last week I woke in the morning and went to the bathroom as usual. I guess there is no 'pretty' way to put this so I will be honest. I had two bouts of explosive black diarrhoea. I felt extremely faint and went back to bed, knowing there was something very wrong happening inside my body. Later that night I was taken by ambulance to the local hospital. The next day after a test with a camera down my throat I was diagnosed with a Mallory-Weiss tear. I had been leaking blood into my intestines for what could have been up to 2-3 months. No wonder I felt so lethargic and I had put that down to drinking too much the night before. Well every night before if I am honest.
I also had damage and scar tissue in my oesophagus. It was explained to me that when you drink and then lay down to sleep, a slight reflux occurs with the acid from your stomach. The stomach has some protection but the oesophagus doesn't. This acid had slowly burnt away over time (years probably) and finally broke through a blood vessel causing the gastric bleed.
I wasn't allowed home as my blood levels were so low I need a transfusion. They were scary days and I cried most of the first two days I was in hospital. I have done real and obvious damage to my body, and I can only imagine how my brain has been affected.
I haven't had a drink since and I am determined that I never will again.
I think of it as my wake up call. I look in the mirror each day now and smile and am so thankful and happy and looking toward my future. Weeks ago I could only see a road leading no where. I am strangely grateful this happened if you can believe it.
I just wanted to add that I had been doing lots of reading on here (especially threads about long term abstainers and how good they felt to be free) and I had also read the Jason Vale book a couple of times (but never seemed to get around to 'the last drink'). I believe all the stars aligned for me at a time when I was feeling ready to make a change - it was getting too painful to continue how I was living. The hospital stay was just the push I needed and it has been such a reality check.
I am 50, and I have been drinking socially since I was 15, however in the last 8 yrs I had really increased my intake. In the last few years I have been drinking up to 2litres of cask wine a night. I have long passed the time of hangovers and vomiting, and have simply felt a little foggy in the morning.
Last week I woke in the morning and went to the bathroom as usual. I guess there is no 'pretty' way to put this so I will be honest. I had two bouts of explosive black diarrhoea. I felt extremely faint and went back to bed, knowing there was something very wrong happening inside my body. Later that night I was taken by ambulance to the local hospital. The next day after a test with a camera down my throat I was diagnosed with a Mallory-Weiss tear. I had been leaking blood into my intestines for what could have been up to 2-3 months. No wonder I felt so lethargic and I had put that down to drinking too much the night before. Well every night before if I am honest.
I also had damage and scar tissue in my oesophagus. It was explained to me that when you drink and then lay down to sleep, a slight reflux occurs with the acid from your stomach. The stomach has some protection but the oesophagus doesn't. This acid had slowly burnt away over time (years probably) and finally broke through a blood vessel causing the gastric bleed.
I wasn't allowed home as my blood levels were so low I need a transfusion. They were scary days and I cried most of the first two days I was in hospital. I have done real and obvious damage to my body, and I can only imagine how my brain has been affected.
I haven't had a drink since and I am determined that I never will again.
I think of it as my wake up call. I look in the mirror each day now and smile and am so thankful and happy and looking toward my future. Weeks ago I could only see a road leading no where. I am strangely grateful this happened if you can believe it.
I just wanted to add that I had been doing lots of reading on here (especially threads about long term abstainers and how good they felt to be free) and I had also read the Jason Vale book a couple of times (but never seemed to get around to 'the last drink'). I believe all the stars aligned for me at a time when I was feeling ready to make a change - it was getting too painful to continue how I was living. The hospital stay was just the push I needed and it has been such a reality check.
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