AA meeting experiences please?

[mauritiusdodo]

AA meeting experiences please?

Thanks trucker

I am oddly looking forward to going! right on with my mountain of ironing...

[mauritiusdodo]

AA meeting experiences please?

I enjoyed the meeting! There was a speaker for 20 mins then the 10 steps then 4 people shared their experiences, then the 12 other things (forget what they are called?) then the goodbye thingy, a lot of what was said I related to and the people were all really friendly, I was given 3 people's numbers in case I needed them before the next meeting (Thursday) and a starter pack plus list of group meetings, I am going back either Thurs or Fri

What I didn't get and expected to was any advice at all - is this something that isn't done?

[mauritiusdodo]

AA meeting experiences please?

I have read through all the information I was given and I still don't really get how AA will help me other than me listening to other peoples success stories, the main speaker mentioned sponsors - how soon will I be given one and what does this entail? You know actually I have so many questions I am going to ring the helpline and ask!

[Lucelastic07]

AA meeting experiences please?

Hi Mauritius
I know exactly what you mean. I've now been to 5 meetings and at the Saturday ones, temporary sponsors are asked to raise their hands but that's the only mention, and nobody explained what I'm supposed to do with that information. At those meetings, we read around the group from a part of the Big Book as selected by the chairperson, then it's open for sharing. It is becoming evident that I am the only person not sharing. At the Wednesday meetings, we all have to say our names and the dreaded 'alcoholic' word, unless you say "pass" when it gets to you. Then a speaker will tell their story for about half hour/40 minutes then others will congratulate them, give their thoughts and 'share' if they want. Again, all very interesting, but what about me?! For the record, I've generally put ?1 or 50p in the pot when it comes round, and I bought the "Living Sober" book for a few quid but don't have a copy of the Big Book. I'm picking up the terminology but nobody explains, it's just assumed that somehow you know what "in the rooms" and "handing it over" etc means! I'm painfully shy - part of the reason I started drinking all those years ago! - so find it very hard to put myself out there. I only have the number of one person I'm comfortable contacting, and even then, only by text as I'm not a phone call kind of person. But she rang me the other night after I finally text some of these frustrations, instead of saying "yeah I'm ok" every time she asked, and she's agreed to be my temporary sponsor, whatever the hell that means. We'll see. Another meeting tonight! But I am a single mum and could no way do the recommended 90 meetings in 90 days, and have had a couple of false starts this last month where I despaired if I'd ever get anything out of it. So who knows.
But anyway, a long waffle but that's my experience so far. Keep "sharing"! Would be good to compare.
:new:

[Liath]

AA meeting experiences please?

Hey Ladies...

No doubt you will be confused, if you begin by attending big book and speaker meetings. The best thing to do is find a BEGINNERS meeting (the type of meeting should be listed) or even better, a WOMENS meeting. There is an unspoken rule that members of the opposite sex are supposed to leave the newcomer alone. So you should try to connect with other women in the room. The beginners meeting focuses on the first 3 steps and absolutely is there to explain how it works to the newcomer.. In fact, you could bring it up as a topic. The sooner you get a sponsor the better, they will guide you through the steps and explain everything. You can get a temporary just to be certain that you can get along with the person--sometimes personalities don't mix, which is no reflection on the program.

Part of how AA is going to work for you is approaching it honestly and asking for help. If it is your turn to share and you say, "Hey! I am confused about how this works and how its going to help me. I'd appreciate some help here! And what the heck is a sponsor anyways?". If you do this, another woman will very likely approach you after the meeting, chat with you a while, give her number, and/or invite you to coffee. Accept the offer, make the call, and let them explain things to you.

There are many different theories on why AA works. One key thing, it is a fellowship. We all feel like we are different, horribly afflicted, or some version of that when we are actively drinking. Suddenly, we find ourselves in a room full of seemingly normal people, until they tell their story.. and it sounds just like our own. To really become part of the fellowship, you have to reach out, make friends. Those friends will be there for you when you are tempted, I mean really tempted to drink, you can make a call, and someone will be there for you.

Finally, because of AA I have new friends who call me almost every day and want to hang out--sober. And this is keeping me sober now for 15 whole days. It is a miracle-- AA saves peoples lives.. I know I sound like a big AA 'preacher' type but I am just so grateful that they are helping me turn my life around.

Good luck!:h

[TheSunFlower]

AA meeting experiences please?

Liath.....I agree with everything you said. I prefer mixed meetings....and many times learn more from the men. One thing I will say.....I don't really hear my story all that much. BUT, regardless of the story....at the end of day AL left us all with the same feelings....and that is how I connect to people. I may not have hid my drinking, gotten a DUI, drink wine or whiskey.....but, it left me with despair, emptiness and wonderful hangovers.....not to mention self loathing and boatloads of anxiety.

[matti1024]

AA meeting experiences please?

I am a theist, so saying the Lord's Prayer at the end of meetings doesn't bother me. But what if you're not a Christian? The problem I have with AA is when courts demand you go, or to NA, CA, whatever. To me that is unconstitutional, and it has been proven so in many court cases.

There are a few of the steps that focus on your transgressions and the negative things you have "allowed" alcohol to do to screw up your life. If alcohol is a progressive disease, which it is, how can you blame yourself for having a disease? Makes no sense to me. That's like blaming yourself for getting brain cancer.

That said, AA has helped thousands of people, and saved many lives. If it works for you, good! It IS a good place for support and fellowship. I usually enjoy the meetings, even though I have a few problems with AA as I stated above.

[mauritiusdodo]

AA meeting experiences please?

I don't think we have beginners meetings here in the uk, or women only groups, I am going to just keep on going to the one I went to on Monday and see how I progress, there are only two others in my area I could get to can't be too choosy!

[Bean]

AA meeting experiences please?

Mauri

There are ALL kinds of AA meetings all over the world. They have them on cruise ships and in remote little places sometimes. There was even one in the Grand Canyon when I was there on hols, camping some years ago.

The UK has Beginners, womens, Step meetings, Big Book meetings, share meetings - they are all there for the taking. I don't know if you live in a rural place, so yes, the choice might not be so extensive but there will be something.

Seems like you have a lot of questions about the AA programme. I went to my first meeting years ago after calling the AA number. Someone local to me called me back for a good chat, explained a lot of things, met me for coffee and then went with me to my first meeting. It was good to have this 'buddy'. Why don't you give them a ring and they will be able to answer your questions. It feels good to know what's what and how it all works...

Hope your week is going well. Keep going. You can do it!
Bean

[mauritiusdodo]

AA meeting experiences please?

Thanks bean, I have been given a list of meetings in my area and the only ones are big book and share meetings I am happy to just use those. Yes I think after Fridays meeting I might call the helpline if I don't get any more information, I do have lots of questions LOL

Bean;1351908 wrote: Mauri

There are ALL kinds of AA meetings all over the world. They have them on cruise ships and in remote little places sometimes. There was even one in the Grand Canyon when I was there on hols, camping some years ago.

The UK has Beginners, womens, Step meetings, Big Book meetings, share meetings - they are all there for the taking. I don't know if you live in a rural place, so yes, the choice might not be so extensive but there will be something.

Seems like you have a lot of questions about the AA programme. I went to my first meeting years ago after calling the AA number. Someone local to me called me back for a good chat, explained a lot of things, met me for coffee and then went with me to my first meeting. It was good to have this 'buddy'. Why don't you give them a ring and they will be able to answer your questions. It feels good to know what's what and how it all works...

Hope your week is going well. Keep going. You can do it!
Bean

[BakerExtraordinaire]

AA meeting experiences please?

TheSunFlower;1351804 wrote: Liath.....I agree with everything you said. I prefer mixed meetings....and many times learn more from the men. One thing I will say.....I don't really hear my story all that much. BUT, regardless of the story....at the end of day AL left us all with the same feelings....and that is how I connect to people. I may not have hid my drinking, gotten a DUI, drink wine or whiskey.....but, it left me with despair, emptiness and wonderful hangovers.....not to mention self loathing and boatloads of anxiety.

Are you me? I too often feel "not that bad" at AA meetings, but have only been to 3 so far. Checking out a womens-only next Wednesday You're right, the connection is so important.

[TheSunFlower]

AA meeting experiences please?

Baker....at the end of the day we are all the same. It took me a really long time to understand that. Connect with the emotion that AL left us all with. You don't need to lose your job, DUI, have your family leave....to feel exactly like the person who did lose all those things. In a way I did.....I was just looking at pictures of my kids when they were younger...I feel like I missed it....even though I always drank at home. Put AL in me....and I am not really present. Good Luck!

[mauritiusdodo]

AA meeting experiences please?

I had an upsetting experience at last nights meeting, a guy who was at the first one I went to shared that he had tried to commit suicide on Wednesday, he didn't go into details but just said he was thankful to have the meeting and everyone there to come back to, I lost my father to suicide 18 years ago and this really got to me Other than that I enjoyed the meeting and am looking forward to the next one

[Kradle123]

AA meeting experiences please?

matti1024;1351806 wrote: I am a theist, so saying the Lord's Prayer at the end of meetings doesn't bother me. But what if you're not a Christian? The problem I have with AA is when courts demand you go, or to NA, CA, whatever. To me that is unconstitutional, and it has been proven so in many court cases.

There are a few of the steps that focus on your transgressions and the negative things you have "allowed" alcohol to do to screw up your life. If alcohol is a progressive disease, which it is, how can you blame yourself for having a disease? Makes no sense to me. That's like blaming yourself for getting brain cancer.

That said, AA has helped thousands of people, and saved many lives. If it works for you, good! It IS a good place for support and fellowship. I usually enjoy the meetings, even though I have a few problems with AA as I stated above.

Hi Matti:
Alcoholism is considered a disease but it it is also a behavior. No one with brain cancer (unless they had a seizure) got in a car and killed someone going the wrong way down the road. I think this is where the problem comes in...Behavior is almost always seen as ultimately a Choice. Well, certainly the legal one.
And I think in many non drinkers minds, blame comes after a persosn admits to having the problem and continues...
I'm not saying any of this is right but I believe this is how it is, for most people in my experience.
AA I believe tries to walk the line among these parodoxes. If it keeps poeple sober and safe thne overthinking it is probably not a good idea.

Hugs,
:l

[matti1024]

AA meeting experiences please?

Kradle123;1352788 wrote: Behavior is almost always seen as ultimately a Choice. Well, certainly the legal one.

Hi Kradle,

A friend and client of mine died from drinking. Was that his choice? I'll never understand the answer to that. He just couldn't stop. It was a real tragedy. Why such a talented, nice man would take his own life is a mystery to me. God bless him.

Matti1024