My new life

[Annieslane]

I'm not sure if I'm writing this in the right place but I wanted to introduce myself
I'm 37 from Australia and have a one year old daughter, I have been a regular drinker for 10 or more yrs! Drink a botttle or 2 ( mostly 2) every night or second night, I can go without drinking and do so for 3-4 days with no withdrawals.
I need to stop i am terrified of doing liver damage and leaving my daughter a orphan!
But I don't want to stop completly, I am a binge drinker mainly on wine I find it hard to not finish the whole bottle!
Is it possiable to be able to control this with the herbs and steps or will I gave to give it up completly

[LibraryGirl]

My new life

Hi Annie.:welcome: There are differing opinions on whether it's possible to moderate your alcohol intake...I would suggest that you at least take 30 days away from alcohol and see how you feel. Take it one day at a time and come here every day for support. There are lots of folks here at the same exact place as you are now. You will get lots of advice and help from people who are also struggling and from others who have successfully quit drinking. There is also a moderation part of this forum, and folks there support each other to drink moderately. Good luck and have a look around!:l

[patrice]

My new life

Hi Annie,'

I've just taken that very advice and have had 31 days Af... that puts a whole new slant on things and from there you will be in a healthier position to decide about Al. I was the same as you, the supplements really help and this site is great!

Take care
Patrice

[FlyAway]

My new life

Hi Annie, it's nice to meet you! :welcome:

[Annieslane]

My new life

Thank you for your responses, the thought off never having a glass of wine again is terrifying!! Maybe after the 30 days I hope I feel different!

[Pinecone]

My new life

Hi Annieslane,

I just wanted to welcome you and give you some support. You'll find so many people here going through alot of the same stuff, at different stages, it might surprise you.

Having my child was one of my main reasons for actually getting serious about quitting. I wanted her to grow up with the real me, not my drinking.

I can also sympathize with you about the fear at first. I remember that fear very well. I also reasoned that I shouldn't be afraid to "take a break" because if I was afraid then that meant that I had a problem (I always knew I did though,).

Some things and concepts that I found helpful were:

Urge Surfing
Euphoric Recall
H.A.L.T. (hungry, alone, lonely, tired)
Distraction (especially the first week)
Snacking
also check out the toolbox: https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html

[Kradle123]

My new life

Hi Annie and Welcome!

Personally I don't think ten years is that long ! but I've been drinking for 20 plus which in print looks awful to me.

Still, I wouldn't concentrate on the ' I can't ever have another glass of wine' thing. That's just too big IMO. You mentioned your liver and I would start there, looking at this from a health perspective. Obviously AL does a number on our health- wish it didn't but there it is. I actually found MWO in 2007 because I was worried aboute the same thing and I was googling liver vitamins or some such thing; I forget. And kudzu came up and then this place....the rest is a longer story but suffice to say I dove into the program heart and soul: used all the sups, went on the Topa as directed and I dd moderate successfully for some time. Then I ran into life again and for whatever reason I slowly fell away from the supps, the topa, the regime and just got a WTF attitude.

Well 5 years later I'm back again, supps and Topa but this time I don't think I'll Moderate because I'm 50, it's really going to kill my health in the long run even moderateing. A lot of icky stuff happened while I was one bottle a day so I would rather not have my husband see me drink and have him worry, 'oh crap here we go again sort of thing. And my children say stuff like, " mommy your breath stinks. You smell like wine." which just seems so wrong to me now...

So, anyway, sorry to ramble. Again. I would not look at the whole forest at this point and just concentrate on the trees...or your liver.

Stay close. Lots of great people here,
:l

[LillyE]

My new life

Welcome Annie :welcome: you will find a lot of people here who can completely relate to what you're feeling and going through right now.

library girl and others have given you great advice here. You don't have to decide about forever right now. Why don't you just focus on seeing if you can go 30 days without drinking and come here and read and post a lot all over the boards while you do? That alone with give you much more clarity and insight to work out what's ultimately best for you.

Good luck :l there's lots of great support here.

Lilly

[Nelz]

My new life

Annieslane;1381272 wrote: Thank you for your responses, the thought off never having a glass of wine again is terrifying!! Maybe after the 30 days I hope I feel different!

You just gave yourself some of the best advice you could. Yes, when you are considering going AF the thought of never drinking again is indeed terrifying. But I am fairly confident that when you get some AF time under your belt, you will see that life is just a little better without it. It is a difficult road to hoe at first, but it WILL get easier the longer you can stay strong.

The decision to moderate or abstain will ultimately be up to you. Its a pretty heated topic on this board, with some very strong opinions on both sides of the argument. My suggestion is take whatever tidbits of advice that work for "you" Different approaches work for different people

I wish you success in whatever road you choose, and this board will have no shortage of support if you stay around :welcome:

[Sober Visitor]

My new life

Hi Annie,

Welcome to MWO! Excellent advice, as always!

I agree that the whole "I can never drink again" mindset is such a set up for failure because it can lead us to feel deprived and negative and afraid about what lies ahead. I'm 3.5 years sober but I know that I always have the choice to go back to drinking if I want to. Sobriety didn't take that choice away for me. However, what I have found is that I love living my life sober so much that I honestly don't want to go back to drinking. It was truly a revelation for me to discover that everything I had previously believed about sobriety turned out not to be true. I honestly didn't think I could make it one single day without AL and yet here I am.

Sheri

[FlyAway]

My new life

Sober Visitor;1381483 wrote: Hi Annie,

Welcome to MWO! Excellent advice, as always!

I agree that the whole "I can never drink again" mindset is such a set up for failure because it can lead us to feel deprived and negative and afraid about what lies ahead. I'm 3.5 years sober but I know that I always have the choice to go back to drinking if I want to. Sobriety didn't take that choice away for me. However, what I have found is that I love living my life sober so much that I honestly don't want to go back to drinking. It was truly a revelation for me to discover that everything I had previously believed about sobriety turned out not to be true. I honestly didn't think I could make it one single day without AL and yet here I am.

Sheri

I agree with this 100%. When I came here I couldn't fathom not drinking again. I spent 8 months trying to quit and trying to figure out how to fit alcohol back into my life again. After 8 months I got to the point where I actually looked forward to not drinking ever again. But you don't have to be there. All that you really need at this point is a desire to get your alcohol consumption under control. That means that your mind stays focused on the goal. That if you screw up one night you don't say the hell with it and stop trying. It means that if you mess up you come here and keep posting and keep trying. The only way you fail at this is if you stop trying.