I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

[spicoli0420]

I can remember 2 days in the last year when I didn't drink and somehow I am still alive, I still have a job, and I still function somehow. I also have a Xanax addiction and have been using it for years since a Psychologist diagnosed me with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. This drug too has be hooked and need to get slowly get off it and start living again and not just existing. What is worse is that I live 8,000 miles away from home and don't have the support groups on this small island in Asia or the adequate medical help I need. I would like any advice or tips on how to get off these drugs that are ruining my life. I wake up everyday surrounded by bottles or cans and somehow make it through the day and then the cycle starts again right when I get off work. Should I go cold turkey? Should I try to wean? I am scared of the DT's and dying out here alone. So lost....please any advice. Thanks.

[TheSunFlower]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

I can't say on the AL....because I always went cold turkey on that and had no problems. I did feel like shit, but within 24 hours I was good.

The benzo was different. I eventually weaned down to enough that "I forgot to take it". But, it took months. It took 3 month to get there. But....it was absolute hell getting there. I don't think I slept for weeks...

Everyone is different. Be careful...but do not allow youself to not stop. Everyone can stop. You have to find the right plan for you.

I have heard horrid stories here of quiting the AL.....I just never experienced them. Hopefully, by morning you have more replies.

[paulywogg]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

hi spicoli,i would definately taper down,how much of the benzo do you take a day?how much of the al?without medical attn,its gonna be rough,but it can be done,probly slow but you gotta do it safely,keep checking in let us know how your doing,and welcome!

[kneesrbad]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

Wine-aholic

:new: I am writing to ask for guidance as well! I want to stop drinking my wine every night and want to really start living! I regret that I need to come home to a glass of wine but don't stop until I go to bed. I recently quit smoking and now I really need to quit this drinking too!

[Doggygirl]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

Hi spicoli and :welcome: I do not have any personal experience coming off benzos so will leave it to others to make suggestions there.

Coming off of alcohol can be dangerous. Have you taken a look at the sticky thread with information about alcohol withdrawal? Here is a link.. https://www.mywayout.org/community/f7...wal-13412.html

I quit cold turkey, but I was fortunate to have my husband here to keep an eye on me. We reviewed the links in the alcohol withdrawal thread together. He knew what to watch for to take me to th hospital or dial the emergency number if needed. It's nothing to mess around with.

Do you have someone who can stay with you while you try to come off of the alcohol?

It is also important to have a good game plan for staying off the AL once you find a safe way to come off of it. (the benzos too) I hope you will read around the site and maybe download the book so you can put a plan together. The toolbox thread linked in my signature is a good read.

Good luck!

DG

[Lavande]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

Hello & welcome Spicoli,

Glad you found us!
Sorry to hear that you have no support but we do support each other here.

I started by downloading the MWO book from the Health store here on the site. It has a lot of good information. Please use the ideas in the https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html to help you put a good plan together for yourself.

Whoever is prescribing the benzos for you should give you a withdrawal plan to use. You don't want to stop them cold turkey. Depending on the amount of AL you drink daily, you may want to taper that as well over the next few days to be safe.

Please drop in the Newbies Nest thread for more support.
Wishing you the best!

Lav

[Kradle123]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

Hi Spico and Welcome !

This may sound odd but I belive that ultimately we all fight this battle alone but very much togther. I know face to face is important but you do have poeple there...even if it's just the woman in the library or the petrol person...
One thing that really helped me was/is my Ipad becasue I can take it anywhere and always be in touch with Someone here at MWO. There are popel herefrom all over the owrld so thanks to the time difference there is always someone here to talk to and share.

I'm here during the day as I work from home and check in...

Stay close,
Hugs and heart
:l:h

[SKendall]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

Hi and welcome. I think both addictions need to be addressed medically. I used xanax as morning after relief of drinking and didn't realize it was problematic until my rx ran out and I decided not to refill it. My withdrawl was pretty bad and my dr. likened it to heroin withdrawl. He prescribed librium and offered me a taper down program for the xanax. I decided to just use the librium, but it took a few days to start feeling even close to normal.

Good luck and see a dr.

[spicoli0420]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

kneesrbad;1410171 wrote: :new: I am writing to ask for guidance as well! I want to stop drinking my wine every night and want to really start living! I regret that I need to come home to a glass of wine but don't stop until I go to bed. I recently quit smoking and now I really need to quit this drinking too!

Maybe we can do this together and encourage each other. NO ONE knows I have a problem-If anything my friends out here think I am a social drinker. Yeah, I won't sleep until the alcohol gets me there. Good luck to you and I hope we both make positive changes for our LIVES!!! Take care.

[Slaythefear]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

Spicol,

I drank and take Ativan. Many people are given Xanax or Ativan when going through alcohol withdrawals, so I hope you aren't trying to eliminate them both at the same time. I still take Ativan at night to get to sleep. After I had gained some AF time, I tried to ween off the Ativan and became horribly depressed. When I added it back up to full dose, I was better. I believe I tried to do too much too fast. So, my suggestion would be to get some good AF time in first. Don't bite off too much at once. Your brain needs to adapt and that takes time, so be patient with it. I've decided to keep on the Ativan until I get my life in order and feel more stable in AF land. Then I will try to ween down the Ativan using meditation and calming techniques to help. Someone suggested Epson Salt baths at night which I may try as well when I am strong enough.

One step at a time.

[Phin]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

spicoli0420;1410156 wrote: I can remember 2 days in the last year when I didn't drink and somehow I am still alive, I still have a job, and I still function somehow.

I too need to start living and not just existing! I can't remember a time where I had a string of AF days. My husband is furious with me, and I hate myself.

How do people just stop? I see peoples signatures on here AF since 09, etc, and I think HOW?? Why can't I do it??? The problem is, I have a very hard time not seeing my life without AL.

I need help too and I also need to change....I'm with you Spicoli. :l

[Raven2012]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

spicoli0420

I'm very concerned about you. Xanax is a serious drug as is alcohol. I'm not sure what is worse. You need to keep your job obviously. What of thee two drugs is causing you more harm? Thats the first step. I suspect the xanax could be reduced/elimineate and you could still get a could gould get a could nights sleep with the sleep medication. One thing at at a time. I wish i could help more.

[maddiemadison]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

I have absolutely no experience with drug + Al, so have no first hand help I can give. But I would think that someone here would have knowledge of an online doctor that they could recommend for you to ask for advice if you have no-one you can go too?? Any one have thoughts on this?

[maddiemadison]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

Phin;1410462 wrote: I too need to start living and not just existing! I can't remember a time where I had a string of AF days. My husband is furious with me, and I hate myself.

How do people just stop? I see peoples signatures on here AF since 09, etc, and I think HOW?? Why can't I do it??? The problem is, I have a very hard time not seeing my life without AL.

I need help too and I also need to change....I'm with you Spicoli. :l

Phin, making the decision that you've had enough is the first step, congratulations. I had a similar situation, angry husband and very low thoughts of myself. The first steps for me when I was drinking every day was Topa but this was hard to get prescribed in Australia, maybe not so much now there is more awareness. Then I tried Camprol, didn't like the side effects, upset stomach but wow I DID NOT FEEL LIKE DRINKING this for me was the change. I didn't take it for long but enough to put some distance and time between drinks and then I took it when I really needed it when trying to be AF.

Going to the doctors was scary but she was wonderful, this is a more common problem than what you think it is or is talked about, she was very understanding.

Remember it's the AL that has a hold on you, and that's overpowering your own will to stop,, it's stronger than you are in many ways. Finding a way to ease it out of your life is the key, have a look around there are so many story's of different ways to do this, this one is just mine. :welcome:

[jjcopper]

I am losing a battle everyday and need help and to change

Welcome Spicolio, I had a Xanax addiction a few years ago. Alcohol addiction as well. I am on day 6 without alcohol. Do not come off Xanax cold turkey! Never! You are going to have to taper it down depending on how much you take. Example if you take 3 a day, then start with 2 a day for a few days, then 1 a day a few days, then 1/2 a day for a few days, then 1/4 then crushing into water the smallest amount. You will have dreams and hear and see things that are not there. It is not easy but you can do it. Also if you stop alcohol cold you will have withdrawals that are really nasty. I ended up in the ER with chest pains. Everyone if different depending on how long and how much you drink. It is nothing to mess with. taper the alcohol as well and have a way to seek medical treatment if you find it too hard and too scary. There is nothing wrong with getting medical help if it is available. Keep checking back on here and everyone will support you. Good luck.