The Big Sober House 2
Day 7 in the Big Sober House
Day 7 in the Big Sober House. 3am. The lights go on. It's Treetops.
MARIO: Huh?
BYRDIE: WHAT THE BLAZES!
LAV: Oh for the love of God...
GOD: Oh Jesus.
JESUS: Oh for fuck's sake.
FUCK: Oh for crying out loud.
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh:upset:
LOLAB: WHO WOKE THE BABY?!
JACKIE CLAIRE: Right, what's going on? Anyone?
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaaaahhhhhhhh....
CAT: I think someone turned a light on?
GOD: Not me. Aint done that in a while.
KUYA: Fuck me
FUCK: What?
GOD: Yes Kuya?
KUYA: God?!?! Ok, OWN UP! Who spiked my drink? Eh? Who spiked my elderflower cordial?
GOD: So skeptical Kuya. So, so skeptical. C'mere, lemme give you a bossey.
God gives Kuya a bossey. Kuya squirms uncomfortably.
LAV: Am i the only voice of reason in this god forsaken house?
GOD: Hardly god forsaken Lavande.
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaaaaaahhhhhhhh.......
LAV: So why are we all up?
CAT: The lights.
MARIO: Lights
BYRDIE: What about the lights?!
MARIO: They're on.
BYRDIE: Good grief, I see that, but what's the problem?
MARIO: They ought to be off.
BYRDIE: Because?
LAV: Byrdie, you're tired. Go back to bed.
MARIO: Because it's 3am.
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......
ZEN: OK squad - who's daring to turn the lights on at this god forsaken hour?!
GOD: I'm beginning to take offence...
TREETOPS: Hehehe... eh... me?
STAR: Why? Can't you see we're asleep?
TREETOP: But it's not sleepy time where i am. It's the next day. I wanna get up and do things. And now i can't.... :upset: The rest of you are all so slow. You're in yesterday and I'm in tomorrow and you say Monday and I say Tuesday and now the baby's awake... so let's call the whole thing off :upset:
STAR: Whoa! Tree, it's ok, it's ok.
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh.....
DETERMINATOR: Anyone mind if I take CryingOutLoud for a walk.
KTAB: Please do.
DETERMINATOR: Back in a mo...
Determinator pops outside with CryingOutLoud
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaaaa - - ka-doof.....wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee..... sphlat.
Determinator returns inside. CryingOutLoud remains somewhere outside.
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaah?
STAR: So, Tree, it's ok to start earlier than the rest of us. We understand that on your side of the Big Sober House the sun comes up a bit before the rest of us. That's ok. It can't be helped.
DETERMINATOR: Anyway, we need someone to kick start the daily af thread while Mick-the-Farmer-who-Fields-us-with-Funnies takes a short break in Tinyrelief. Tree - you've been doing a grand job of it so far - keep it up.
STAR: Mick's a farmer?
MOLLY: Not sure that he is, acshully.
DETERMINATOR: Maybe not, but I imagine him to be. All them early rises. Bet there grows wild garlic in his fields...
TREE: So, you're not mad at me.
MARIO: No, not mad.
BYRDIE: Of course not, but you could lower the dimmer switch on the light Tree?
TREE: Of course.
JC: Great - right then, back to bed everyone. Apart from you Tree, of course.
KUYA: And me!
JC: Kuya?
KUYA: I'm from New Zealand too! This is my time! I'm up as well.
BYRDIE: Good grief. Kuya, when are you NOT up?
MARIO: Night all...
And so, like an episode of The Waltons, the housemates all say good night to each other, with each bedroom light switching off one at a time. Apart from the twinkly light of a light at the south side of the house, where Treetops began her day...
Meanwhile outside...Mother Head has just found herself a brand new baby.
Day 7 in the Big Sober House
Day 7 in the Big Sober House. 3am. The lights go on. It's Treetops.
MARIO: Huh?
BYRDIE: WHAT THE BLAZES!
LAV: Oh for the love of God...
GOD: Oh Jesus.
JESUS: Oh for fuck's sake.
FUCK: Oh for crying out loud.
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh:upset:
LOLAB: WHO WOKE THE BABY?!
JACKIE CLAIRE: Right, what's going on? Anyone?
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaaaahhhhhhhh....
CAT: I think someone turned a light on?
GOD: Not me. Aint done that in a while.
KUYA: Fuck me
FUCK: What?
GOD: Yes Kuya?
KUYA: God?!?! Ok, OWN UP! Who spiked my drink? Eh? Who spiked my elderflower cordial?
GOD: So skeptical Kuya. So, so skeptical. C'mere, lemme give you a bossey.
God gives Kuya a bossey. Kuya squirms uncomfortably.
LAV: Am i the only voice of reason in this god forsaken house?
GOD: Hardly god forsaken Lavande.
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaaaaaahhhhhhhh.......
LAV: So why are we all up?
CAT: The lights.
MARIO: Lights
BYRDIE: What about the lights?!
MARIO: They're on.
BYRDIE: Good grief, I see that, but what's the problem?
MARIO: They ought to be off.
BYRDIE: Because?
LAV: Byrdie, you're tired. Go back to bed.
MARIO: Because it's 3am.
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......
ZEN: OK squad - who's daring to turn the lights on at this god forsaken hour?!
GOD: I'm beginning to take offence...
TREETOPS: Hehehe... eh... me?
STAR: Why? Can't you see we're asleep?
TREETOP: But it's not sleepy time where i am. It's the next day. I wanna get up and do things. And now i can't.... :upset: The rest of you are all so slow. You're in yesterday and I'm in tomorrow and you say Monday and I say Tuesday and now the baby's awake... so let's call the whole thing off :upset:
STAR: Whoa! Tree, it's ok, it's ok.
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh.....
DETERMINATOR: Anyone mind if I take CryingOutLoud for a walk.
KTAB: Please do.
DETERMINATOR: Back in a mo...
Determinator pops outside with CryingOutLoud
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaaaa - - ka-doof.....wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee..... sphlat.
Determinator returns inside. CryingOutLoud remains somewhere outside.
CRYING OUT LOUD: Waaah?
STAR: So, Tree, it's ok to start earlier than the rest of us. We understand that on your side of the Big Sober House the sun comes up a bit before the rest of us. That's ok. It can't be helped.
DETERMINATOR: Anyway, we need someone to kick start the daily af thread while Mick-the-Farmer-who-Fields-us-with-Funnies takes a short break in Tinyrelief. Tree - you've been doing a grand job of it so far - keep it up.
STAR: Mick's a farmer?
MOLLY: Not sure that he is, acshully.
DETERMINATOR: Maybe not, but I imagine him to be. All them early rises. Bet there grows wild garlic in his fields...
TREE: So, you're not mad at me.
MARIO: No, not mad.
BYRDIE: Of course not, but you could lower the dimmer switch on the light Tree?
TREE: Of course.
JC: Great - right then, back to bed everyone. Apart from you Tree, of course.
KUYA: And me!
JC: Kuya?
KUYA: I'm from New Zealand too! This is my time! I'm up as well.
BYRDIE: Good grief. Kuya, when are you NOT up?
MARIO: Night all...
And so, like an episode of The Waltons, the housemates all say good night to each other, with each bedroom light switching off one at a time. Apart from the twinkly light of a light at the south side of the house, where Treetops began her day...
Meanwhile outside...Mother Head has just found herself a brand new baby.
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