Failed on Day 30

[Mick]

Failed on Day 30

Hi change..well where are we up to now..you still af??

[change=freedom]

Failed on Day 30

Hi Mick - yes, still AF, it was just a blip. Thanks for checking in

p.s. I'll have to give your recipe for stovies a go sometime (not heard of it before, but sounds yummy)

[kuya]

Failed on Day 30

Good to hear Change ....... Cos you DON'T drink and nor do I .....brilliant isn't it !

[Eve11]

Failed on Day 30

Lavande;1417550 wrote:
One thing I have learned along the way is what I was fearing the most was the 'unknown'. I didn't know who I was going to be as a sober person. I, didn't know how I would handle stress, etc. Turned out my fears were completely unjustified. I pushed myself to learn healthier, better ways to think & handle life. You can do all this too.
Lav

Lavande,

That is a profound statement and may even be the answer change=freedom was looking for. The fear of success and what that would mean to change when 30 days was achieved... so fear took over and AL won that time. I like how you discovered the other things to do that took the place of AL. I just earned my Masters this year and believe me, it couldn't have and wouldn't have happened if I had been drinking every night.

change=freedom, one of my favorite lines I like to use is just make a You-turn and get back on the wagon. You can do it and you've got a lot of support here.

:l
Eve11

[Alcoholic]

Failed on Day 30

Eve11;1420409 wrote: Lavande,

That is a profound statement and may even be the answer change=freedom was looking for. The fear of success and what that would mean to change when 30 days was achieved... so fear took over and AL won that time. I like how you discovered the other things to do that took the place of AL. I just earned my Masters this year and believe me, it couldn't have and wouldn't have happened if I had been drinking every night.

change=freedom, one of my favorite lines I like to use is just make a You-turn and get back on the wagon. You can do it and you've got a lot of support here.

:l
Eve11

Congrats, Eve!


Change: eve is right. The most important thing is to just get back on the wagon! And we are all for that!!!!

[emily]

Failed on Day 30

gmc38609;1417844 wrote: Someone said to me once, don't count the days as it is almost like counting how long you can last before you fail,
Just consider yourself no longer a drinker of alcohol less pressure and forget the amount of days
Easier said than done but i can see the logic

Totally agree, and some amazing advice on this thread.

[change=freedom]

Failed on Day 30

HA! Still AF! I'm starting to feel in control and to see that I CAN LIVE SOBER AND BE HAPPY :jumpwow:

kuya;1420400 wrote: Good to hear Change ....... Cos you DON'T drink and nor do I .....brilliant isn't it !
It really is Kuya, it really and truly is!

Lavande;1417550 wrote:
One thing I have learned along the way is what I was fearing the most was the 'unknown'. I didn't know who I was going to be as a sober person. I, didn't know how I would handle stress, etc. Turned out my fears were completely unjustified. I pushed myself to learn healthier, better ways to think & handle life. You can do all this too.

Lav, I agree with what Eve said in her post above, about fearing the unknown being a big part of it. In the first few days after I initially stopped drinking, I was genuinely terrified because I didn't know who I was without the alcohol. I still have such a long way to go finding new ways to deal with life. But I am actively looking at why I started drinking like that in the first place. And I've started working on becoming myself

[change=freedom]

Failed on Day 30

Wildflowers;1417561 wrote:
Change it's OK to be upset, disappointed in yourself for a few, but no longer. You are far to beautiful, smart, good, & kind for that nonsense!!! Listen to Lav & stay connected to others here, it's vital to your sobriety ~ recovery!!! You can do this!!!.... Before you know it you will have 30 days again & you haven't lost the ones you had. You just learn from them like many of us hun. :l You aren't a failure, you are a natural learner.

Thank you for all your kind words and support Wildflowers. I've gotten over my disappointment in myself. I'm feeling good and you were right - I've nearly got another week AF under my belt. You're really very kind. I just wanted to let you know that your words meant a lot to me even though I didn't reply at the time. Apart from being on my phone, I was also feeling TERRIBLE and paranoid and full of shame, so it was difficult to face this thread, more than just to steal glances and snatch at the help.

Thanks also to techie, Lav, Kuya, Mick, Byrdie, Patrick, gmc, RC, Eve, and Alco for your comments, suggestions, and support. I'm going to keep revisiting and re-reading this thread. Like Emily said, there is "some amazing advice on this thread" :h

[matt2d2]

Failed on Day 30

hey change, hey everyone, i just found this website 3 days ago. i'm 5 days sober. one thing i wanted to add (and believe me this helps me so much reaffrimimg this in my head and hopefully it might help someone else). For 5 yrs i've been trying to get sober( after 20yrs of daily drinkng). the most clean time i've got is 6months. It started out getting 30days, drinking for a couple, then getting 60days, drinking a couple, etc now i get 5/6 months then fall off for a couple. And it sucks! when i slip i feel awful, ashamed, like a total loser, "will i ever remain AF!?!" And at first i feel like i've got to start over, but thats not true! If i let myself think that way i wouldn't make it, that's my disease speaking. Because tha fact is i am winning the battle, think positive, i went from drinking 100% of the time to 10% of the time. Eventhough i've slipped a lot in 5 yrs i 've done a ton of emtional and physical healing. If i read my journal from just 2yrs ago the change is huge. A slip can just be a hic up in the road, its what i want to make of it, but believe me i could do without these damn hic ups, lol, but when they happen i don't dwell on them." Why did it happen?!, what did i do wrong!", not going there, i did it because thats what alcoholics do. I choose to think about the days i don't drink, those are the miracle's for this alcoholic, that's just not normal in my world! And btw if i didn't screw up how could i be much help to anyone else. If i did it perfect, eveyone could admire me but i wouldn't be much help, because i wouldn't know the pain of relapse. sorry for the long post, hang in there change, just think in one month if you only drank 1 or 2 days that was 28days of your body, spirit and mind having wonderful and not so wonderful AF healing, 2 days of drinking can't reverse all that, love you all, matt

[change=freedom]

Failed on Day 30

Thank you for your positive outlook and support, Matt