Samm's Way

[Guest]

Hi Ladies and Gents,

Frankly, my typical online hang out seems to be under the weather tonight (this morning). As a night owl, I ususally post about those things on my mind at this time of night.

Having little time to read your member's posts, I am at somewhat of a disadvantage here.

But here we go; I decided not to drink alcohol of any sort about 3 months ago. It has been a wonderful period with enlightened thinking, more energy, and weight loss. Lately, I have been attempting to moderate somewhat with mixed results. I would appreciate any comments on moderation as I am not sure this is a viable option for me or anyone (if you are completely honest with yourself).

The Rational Recovery book has done wonders for me and of course, moderation is not considered cool. However, as an intrigal part of my job, entertainment at night is a must but cravings (addictive voice) works me over. When I have moderated, it seems to have put me back to square one in just a few weeks. I don't need to be there.

So, hit me with your best shot...........

Samm

[tawnyfrog]

Samm's Way

Well Samm,

Obviously, as an uncool liar, (lol) I'm not going to be of much help. I've found moderation to be a fabulous option for me.

Perhaps, if you have the time to read more posts, you will find some useful advice from other members.

In any case - Welcome.

[ScoobyDoo]

Samm's Way

I welcome you along too and I take my hat off to you for being 3 months AF!

I've also tried moderation, but not with a goal in mind so I'm probably also uncool. I think it's an individual thing, and works successfully for few (which will probably include me).

Doo

[mustdobetter]

Samm's Way

Welcome and congrats for going 3 months AF. I also intend to try moderation after a 30 day period AF. Have you tried taking the supplements? I hear the kudzu works wonders for cravings and perhaps helping you to moderate. That's the path I think I will try first.

Good Luck and welcome again.

[Breez]

Samm's Way

Sorry-but moderation only worked for a week or so for me in the past & eventually I went back to square one. Maybe one day I'll try it again after truly immersing myself in this program and getting at least a year of sobriety that I'll perhaps try it again. For the time being I am very happy & content being AF.

Read the boards, read the book & you can decide from there if moderation is an option for you.

[AAthlete]

Samm's Way

Samm, glad to have you on board.

I certainly believe that moderation can work for some people (after all, RJ is our role model), but for a good chunk of us it is not an option. I'm going alcohol free because frankly I think it is my only option, and I also don't take the Topa - but again it is a personal decision and people do make it work.

[gateway]

Samm's Way

yes...AF is just the way of life for so many of us. mods just doesnt seem to cut it. we try to mod and then we fall off the wagon. on again and off again. AF if tuff love but the only true love. that is the way i see it.
welcome aboard and the best of luck to ya.

[Guest]

Samm's Way

Welcome...moderation is not an option for me....I honestly do not foresee it in my future either, although I must add, I am new to the program.

[Breez]

Samm's Way

I think I should add to my post earlier to clarify that when I stated I might try it again-I didn't mean for moderation because I know I can't do it. I meant having 1 drink at a restaurant for a speacial occasion sometime in the future. I can not see myself having 1 or 2 drinks on the weekend b/c I know it'll just progress to 1-2 a day and so on.

[Rich]

Samm's Way

Im moderating as well mate. Just need to dig in, and know when enough is enough. I am trying to stick to social drinking only, and I am finding this a good rule to stick to.

[lushy]

Samm's Way

Call me uncool too I guess! While I struggled with moderating for quite some time it was because I was not using aspects of this program like I should have been. Once I got consistent with the supplements and the CDs alcohol is no longer the sole focus in my life and it is a very freeing feeling. Don't get me wrong, I can see how easily it would be to fall off that path and I truly believe they are some of us that are "wired" in such a way that abs is really the only way. That is what is so great about this place; the options.

Might want to consider the anti-craving supplements Samm if you are worried about your "addictive voice" getting the best of you. They work.

[mamatee]

Samm's Way

I have been AF for 3+ weeks and am loving it. However, I expect that I will one day trust myself enough to have wine with dinner now and then. Not sure when that will be and I'm in no hurry.
Welcome, this is a great place to work on it!

[Guest]

Samm's Way

Samm's Way

Up too late:

I happened upon your website here last night by chance, as I referred to in my last post. I truly have no business commenting on the journey's of those who are posting here.

I have had ups and downs in my drinking past. I never drank as a young man because my life consisted of taking care of my drunken father and sublime mother. I took total control of the family when I was 14 and am just now finding relief.

My father, became ill once I graduated high school and I took care of him in the most intimate way until he died 15 years later. At his shigrin, I was the first person of my immediate family to attend college (my father asked me why I was such a smart ass, and why I just didn't become an automobile mechanic). I acheived my BS in economics and never finished my MBA (got busy with entreprenuirship and never finished)

Yet , I persevered. As an alcoholic's son, I wanted to be the best at everything, you know that perfectionist ideal. Accordingly, I did well at banking, as a general contractor, real estate appraiser, and anything else that would earn me a buck.

Then, I started to drink. You see, I could justity this as business functions, and in fact, wrote it off truthly as business entertainment. I made business contacts and my business grew.

Fast forward:

I have always been a functional drinker. I have never had a DUI, had work problems, and very minor family problems. However, I have felt like shit. Always an athlete, I became bloated, had dead eyes, and felt horrible.

Once, I quit drinking, after a bout of pancreatitus (google it - it can happen to anyone, even a weekend partier), I had to quit.

I lost 25 lbs, I look like my old self (well not old), I am interacting with my family, etc.)

And, I have slipped.......... Luckily, instead of 3 weeks to get back on track, it took only 72 hours, he amount of time to get the poison out of your body.

My friends, if you think you can moderate......Here is what I have to say about that:

If you are concerned that you drink too much and you need to moderate: by definition you have a problem. So called normal people, who drink socially, have never had to think about moderating. Why? Because they don't drink to get the buzz. (maybe sometimes on weekends, special occasions, etc. but not every night). If you drink to relax (you wan't the buzz), if you drink to socialize and get along with the crowd (you want the buzz), if you feel like crap, and have for so long, that you just want a drink or two to feel normal (you want the buzz).

Sorry, don't kid the kidder. I know where you are. To moderate is to put it off. If you have to keep alcohol on you mind morning and night (you know what I'm talking about: (Morning: damn, I feel bad this morning, I will not drink today), (Night: well just one or two to make me feel better), you can not moderate.

If you take alcohol out of the equation, it soon does not become part of your life, of planning. No more, "Well, not quite ready to eat", "Lets go to XYZ restuarant (where they have alcohol beverages)", You know the games.

I wish you all well. Moreover, I wish you truth.

Your intellegent part of the brain, the neocortex, controls your hands, mouth, driving etc, not the impulse to drink. The midbrain, the involuntary part, controls breathing, hunger, and NOW for you, the desire to drink. It does not care about the consequences, it wants alcohol, or food, or warmth, all of those neanderthal needs (alcohol has been added to the wants).

Let you intellegence win! That damn midbrain is a quadraplegic, it can't do a damn thing to get alchohol down your throat without your higher brain letting it. So, don't let the BEAST make YOU stop by the store, pick up a glass, and put poison down your neck. You are intellegent, it is a primative animal. Beat the beast.

If you need me, I have no affiliation. I simply am passionate about getting this damn acceptable social drug out of our lives so we can live life like it is supposed to be.

Samm

WQD

[Paddy]

Samm's Way

Samm you do sound like a pastor. But I have to agree ;-)

[Paddy]

Samm's Way

And I did try moderation many times, it does seem to work now, with being on Topamax, but alcohol still is on my mind (while not craving it) morning to evening ...