Samm's Way

[lushy]

Samm's Way

Samm, moderation CAN work for some, not all. I am proof you can be a moderator, as well as many others on here. I understand your passion about being alcohol-free and I applaud that, but the beauty of this program and these boards is that we have the option to choose. I would appreciate you respecting that in this forum. Thank you.

[Guest]

Samm's Way

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

I will respect, Yet I really would like some good evidence. I would love nothing better than to convince my family I will drink Moderately Like Normal People.

Give me guideance. I have the wilpower of Job. Lead me on

Samm

[redrobin]

Samm's Way

Hi Samm

I think each one of us has to find our own way. That surely is the beauty of the MWO approach (certainly the thing that has so much appealed to me, at any rate,) that it does offer a more tailored goal to aim for, abstinence to more moderate and controlled consumption of alcohol. Obviously our individual goal and our success in reaching that goal will depend on our starting point along our common road but I do believe that moderation can be a realistic aim for some.

I am fairly new to this program and am currently, and happily, not drinking at all. My longer term aim is moderation, however. Why? Because I want to be in control of alcohol NOT the other way around. I like the idea of alcohol being just another 'thing' in life, something that I can take - or leave, at will.

Maybe you're right Samm and others. Maybe I can't do this but please don't damn my chances before I try.

[Guest]

Samm's Way

Are your guys and gals from Britian and is this the moderation version of the UK forUm?

[Guest]

Samm's Way

But why mess it up.

What is so godamned important about a beverage that after a month of withdrawal from it, the bloodything, your life gets better, your head is clearer, your children love you more, your spouse and you get along better., you are happier at work and getting those pesky projects slowly but surely taken care of, you don't feel like laying your head down on the desk until 5:00 when you can finally get home and get a snort to feel normal for a few hourrs?

Why in the hell, after you climb out of this quicksand, do you methodically stick your ass back in for a little taste, again.

It leads sooner or later back to the same crap: Ok, just 2 glasses of wine. Ok I did well tonight. A bad day at work, small bottle of woodbridge just to relax, well lets go to dinner where they served wine, a couple more glasses. Wake up, feel like shit and curse yourself for being so fooliosh!

Ok, fine, go that route. If you are single and your employer is happy with your performance, who cares. However, as a child of this crap, if you pretend that this is OK for your babies, you are sadly mistaken. They are sponges, obsorb everything, and they are gone out of your house in a few years. If you can't take those few years and be with t hose children sober, what you get later will be of your own doing.

I am not a pastor. I am a Southern business man. I took my 7 year old daughter and her 9 years old girlfriend to dinner tonoght while Mom is out of town. We had fun, real conversation, and when I said prayers with her tonight, she told me I was a way cool dad and the best dad in the world. I told her she was the best daughter in the world.

At a minimum, alcohol would have diminished this response from her. At a maximum, it would never have been spoken. These are the rewards I have received in these last 3 months. I wish the best for you all.

Opinionated as always, but with love, wrong room or not.

Samm

P.S. After my life on both sides of this issue, You damn right I have the right !

[Kimmy]

Samm's Way

Samm - I know moderation will not do it for me - I am the type of person that always does thing overboard - when I open a bottle of whiskey you can throw away to top - so I agree with you whole hearted - but what do I know I am only in this 3 days with is a mere 10% of the time you have been AF - but I welcome you - I see you are a member of other sites as well - so you know what wonderful people are out there and what wonderful support they all offer. So offer them the same, if moderation has worked for some then I am happy for them. Who knows where I will be at day 30.

[ScoobyDoo]

Samm's Way

Samm, I don't take offence by your message and ideas. Actually, I love your passion and having done a bit of reading on that site you referred to, I immediately get it. I felt quite liberated after reading the bullet point section, which is interesting in point, for me. I haven't finished reading!!

I'm like the others... am only crawling, and I have no idea whether moderation is a successful option for me. That was the plan, but... we'll see. I'm just a wee alcohol dependent grasshopper deciding what is going to work for me in the next few weeks and then months and then years. I also do like the approach that the owner of this site has developed (she's American by the way). Whether it's for me, long term... time will tell, and if abstaining is the way I choose to go down the track, then that's cool with me, when I arrive at that point (it'll have to be cool with me!).

My dad went through an alcoholic period in his 40's/50's for about 10-15 years, and is now most definitely a moderator, and has been doing so, successfully for about the past 6 years or so. My mum told me that when I was a teenager, he had several stints in rehab (when he was away on "business"), so his dependency was pretty severe but all I know is that it has worked for him and these days, my parents are the happiest couple I know.

Doo

[boyfromnowhere]

Samm's Way

hey guys

hope your well

in need of help and advice drink far too much every night and want it too stop

[Beaches]

Samm's Way

Welcome Boyfromnowhere,
I would suggest reading the book. Whatever path you choose moderation or abstinence you will find a lot of support here. Keep posting and keep reading.
Best of luck to you

[lushy]

Samm's Way

Samm, why on earth would you want any of us to convince you into moderating when abstaining is what you wish for yourself? For the very same reasons you should not try and work on convincing those of us moderating to abstain. We are accepting of everyone's path here, whether it be what you agree with or not. You say you want good evidence that moderating works. Why? You do not want to drink again. And those of us who have said we are successful at moderating you obviously are choosing not to believe.

[Beaches]

Samm's Way

I agree that no one is here to convince anyone to pick a path. Just to choose the path that works for them. In my case moderation does work for me. We will support everyone in any way that they need it.

[sammys]

Samm's Way

I do believe moderating can work and I do believe that the idea of moderating has helped many people take a look at their drinking habits. If every single one of us had only the choice of no alcohol forever we might not be doing as good as we are now and possibly be drinking more. Just the idea for me of maybe there is another way has made me cut my drinking down drastically. I have had some slips where I did drink to much, but they are far fewer than before I came here. I started drinking at 18 and now am 49 its not gonna happen overnite for me and someday I might choose to quit completely. For now this is what I need it keeps me on track 95% of the time and if that is not enough for some than this is not for them.

Sammys

[Guest]

Samm's Way

Thankyou, Goodnight

I attempted today to delete every post I have made in this forum. Apparently, that has not happened. The poster; Sammy, is not me.

I apparently have offended a prolific poster here and that was not my intention. I have passions about my life, my politics, alcohol, etc. I am accused of speaking my opinions in forums where I should be complacent, however, when I am passionate about something I believe in, I speak forth.

However, I appoligize to anyone whom I have offended in this room and I wish you all the best, and of course, much success with your substance administration, your reason for being a member of this chat room.

Godspeed friends. We all strive for the same outcome: to be well for ourselves and our families and close ones.

Goodnight,

Samm

[ScoobyDoo]

Samm's Way

Good on you Samm. If you feel like coming back in the future, I'm sure you'll be welcomed back with open arms.

Good luck with what you decide to do about the demon drink.

Doo

[Lee]

Samm's Way

Samm
I don't know if you are still on this forum, but you are the reason I signed up, you completely put my "truth" into words..I had never looked at it that hard before.
Thanks