With the exception of the first few shitty days, since the shackles of alcohol were removed almost a month ago, I feel like I'm just getting to know myself for the first time. And, I'm liking what I'm discovering. In fact, I'm loving it if the truth be told.
Gone are the intense feelings of anxiety, guilt, dread, fear, depression, short temper bursts, agitation, irritability, negative thinking, anger and frustration, sadness, crying, feeling sorry for myself, struggling, hiding. All of which had stopped my true personality from blossoming and flourishing. Dark clouds everywhere.
Instead a new woman has been emerging. One that is calm, kind, loving, caring, fun, confident, appreciative, self-assured, positive, focussed, energised, motivated and ambitious. All of which I am deeply grateful for. Feels like the sun is splitting the skies.
Alcohol has deprived me of 20 years of getting to know perhaps the most important person there is - ME. And I don't mean that in a purely selfish way, but if I'm not in a good place due to alcohol, then I'm no use to anyone else either.
So, on that note, there's no way the wee bastard is getting back in to steal more time away from my precious life. I've got a lot of catching up to do and quality time to spend - with MYSELF. And, do you know what? I've never been so excited about my future.
Love to all xxx
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