Went 8 days AF and them my grandma died

[mya]

That is no excuse for me to drink again but I did. My Campral came in the mail today and I didn't drink today. Staring it tomorrow.

[Determinator]

Went 8 days AF and them my grandma died

these first days are so damn slippery Mya. we can do this! sorry for you loss. it's never helpful of course. life just never seems to run out of things to throw at me so I guess i just have to buck up and do this anyway. helmet on, forward march.

[sunshinedaisies]

Went 8 days AF and them my grandma died

I feel for you mya - as you said, it is no excuse to drink, but it is a reason. No doubt a lot will disagree with me. I am so glad that you got your Campral. My prayers are with you and I feel for you,

love and hugs, Sun XXX

[FreeFly]

Went 8 days AF and them my grandma died

Mya, I'm sorry to hear of your loss. Sending hugs :l:l

[RingingCedars]

Went 8 days AF and them my grandma died

Sorry for your loss Mya. My grandma's were pretty special. Look after yourself now, she'd love that.:h

[Wildflowers]

Went 8 days AF and them my grandma died

Hi mya,

I agree with Sunny it's not an excuse but a very understandable reason as to why you picked up. It's what we do until we finally learn & accept that alcohol ~ ethanol ~ poison doesn't work for people like us who lose the ability to control our consumption. Or it repeatedly causes other disturbing emotional, mental, physical, spiritual, legal, financial, relational havoc in our lives. It controls us, harms us & others around us.

I had to learn & am still learning to live life on life's terms. Not mine all the time. I'm overly sensitive at times & would just like to shut life out & not feel to the extent & depth that I do. I am what I am & must go on, or surely die an early death or be even more miserable being a drunk alkie. Most the time I manage & am fairly happy. Yet sometimes I'm not. But, I'm not drinking no matter what, or who. Life skills, coping skills & managing my emotions are important.

My thoughts, can bring about strong emotions that effect my behavior. This also causes if not already clinically present organic chemical changes in the brain.

When my Nana fell on our front porch while we were gone on a trip yrs back. She ended up with hematoma, then went into a coma. She woke up for a week. I almost got caught by the CNA drinking under a tree as I was very distraught!.... I'm sure the nursing staff could also smell it in the room too. I watched her take her last breath. I was drunk, but not obliviated. Life can really ~ really hurt, & it can feel really raw at times, but we can deal, feel & let it be real.

We understand how difficult getting sober is, how much life hurts, how it disappoints. Were to help you get stronger. Cry as much as you need to, scream, feel it all. If cussing helps we have an F it thread over under General board.

I'm so very sorry for your loss!!!.... My Nana ~ Grandma was the one person in my life whom I knew really loved me & I miss her alot!... Take as much time to grieve as you need. But, please don't punish yourself, hurt yourself by drinking poisonous ~ alcohol!!! Love yourself instead!!!.... :h I'll bet she'd like that.

I'm very glad your Campral came today & that you didn't drink!!!... Keep going one day at a time......

Take good gentle care of you!

Wildflowers :l

[mya]

Went 8 days AF and them my grandma died

Thanks for that post Wildflowers.
I have been taking campral and I seem to be only able to take two doses a day instead of three.
Today I feel good
I will keep you posted

[Alcoholic]

Went 8 days AF and them my grandma died

I'm glad you are feeling better, Mya. I'm sorry for your loss, and I'm sure your grandmother, where she is now, is glad that you are quitting.....hugs....