2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

[FallenAngel]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

Thank you again Slay, for a therapeutic & insightful post. :l These are things I have been working on in my life the past 5 years or so. It's a long & slow process to heal inner wounds that manifested early on in childhood.
I will be a daily visitor to this thread... thank you for sharing this with us. :h

[Slaythefear]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

January 21, 2013...





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[Slaythefear]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

January 22, 2013...Taking care of your inner world

Cat Li Stevenson

?Be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars. In the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.? ~Max Ehrmann

Last year, I realized that I lived 28 years without knowing what it really means to love and take care of myself.

In 2010, I took some wonderful, worldly trips?Costa Rica, Bangkok, Taipei?trekking and exploring.

My husband and I bought a second home. I fully engaged myself in the improvements and the creativity of decorating a fresh canvas.

I ran several races, including a half-marathon, and finished well. I joined a swanky health and fitness club where I could take trendy aerobic classes. I was ?taking good care of myself.?

Life was good. I worked hard, I played hard. The end. That was the story I projected.

But it was hardly that simple or fabulous.

There was a whole lot of turbulence in my life that I was trying to fix externally:

My grandma?who became the closest female in my life after my mom passed away?moved back to Taiwan after living in the states for 25 years. Instead of sitting with the hurt, acknowledging how I felt, I planned a trip.

I reasoned with myself: ?No worries, I?ll visit her in Taiwan in a few months.? I booked a flight and put a band-aid on the fact that my grandma would no longer be 30 miles from me but, instead, over 7,000 miles away.

My baby sister?who opened my heart more than I ever thought was possible?left for China. Due to financial hardship, my parents had decided that it?d be better for her to live in China with her grandparents for a few years.

I fought it at first but then subdued my feelings by validating that this was the right thing to do. I remember waving goodbye to her from the taxi with this creeping feeling of sadness and then just stuffing it away.

While traveling overseas, I became pregnant and felt so much joy. My heart grew ten times bigger. It was that same bliss and expansion I experienced with my baby sister. After seven weeks, we learned that there was no heartbeat, and we?d lose the little bean to the universe.

I remember feeling overwhelmed by grief for a few days and then bounced back literally as quickly as I could. I was back at the gym, running full speed a few short days after my surgery.

A few days later, I became very busy trying to lease out our current home and move into the new one. I remember my mother-in-law expressing sincere concern for me. She said, ?Cat, I don?t mean to be hard on you, but you?re doing too much.?

I remember becoming very irritated and defensive. I responded, ?Don?t worry about me. I know it seems like I?m always doing things, but I really do take good care of myself.?

After all, I worked out six days a week. I ate healthy meals. I drank 64 ounces of water daily. I had girl lunches. I had weekly date nights. I scheduled massages when I was stressed. And, on most nights I even slept a minimum of six hours.

I took good care of myself?on the outside.

On the inside, I buried vulnerability. I played the resilience card. I sought out quick-fixes. And I convinced myself I was okay.

I wasn?t taking care of myself emotionally at all. Unconsciously, I placed ?I?ll deal with it later? labels on several situations when they?d trickled into my life unplanned.

Somewhere along the overachieving path of seeking perfection and always looking into the future, I lost myself when these labels accumulated.

I managed to forget how to take care of my inner world.

After neglecting what was really going on in my life, I ended up in a curled up ball in our bedroom corner, head buried in my knees, feeling a heavy amount of pain all at once.

Humans are amazing, though; we adapt, we heal, we are capable of growing stronger.

When we acknowledge that changes, challenges, and hardships are there to deepen us, to remind us that we do get second chances, and that we are each made up of love, compassion, and healing, something remarkable happens.

With this new awareness, I ended 2010 with the promise to live differently.

I made a decision to wake up each day, wholly, by connecting to who I am?to nurture myself from the inside out, to be with life instead of delay it?and, in turn, my days started to become more inviting again.

This year:

I traveled to connect instead of using it as an escape.

I became a morning person and started each day with ample time for writing, reading, and practicing yoga instead of rushing into the office, fighting traffic, and always feeling behind.

I found peace by journaling and peeling back layers to heal the hurt that was buried beneath instead of pushing them away.

I started acknowledging my accomplishments and mini-successes and celebrated with small rewards instead of rushing to the next best thing.

I slowed down, simplified tasks, reduced my online time, and committed to less instead of doing, moving, and achieving, simply for the sake of it.

I felt. I embraced the sadness I?d been carrying with me and leaned into my fears instead of placing a patch on them.

I listened to my body. I became a vegetarian and practiced mindful eating instead of counting calories and agonizing over whether or not I consumed too many carbs.

I chose to let go of the stories I kept replaying about the past and the worries I created for the future instead of clinging onto fear and anxiety.

I practiced saying no to the commitments that didn?t serve my values instead of saying yes to everything and shorting myself with each added responsibility.

I created sanctuaries?weekly time for me to relax and just be?instead of waiting for burn out before replenishing.

I followed my intuition and listened to myself in meditation instead of thinking and overanalyzing to the point of exhaustion.

I asked myself questions and allowed it to be okay that I didn?t have the answers right away instead of being hard on myself for not knowing.

I began fully acknowledging the present in its entirety?every aspect, including the playful, joyful moments, and the uncomfortable, challenging ones.

Suddenly, the world took on a different appearance?a kinder, more meaningful, more abundant, and compassionate glow.

When we take the time to re-connect with ourselves, replace our fears with trust, and learn to let go of the things we cannot control, this is taking care.

When we listen to our intuition, embrace all of our imperfections, and stay authentic to who we are, this is taking care.

When we ground ourselves in the present and make mental space to find clarity, this is taking care.

When we discover our interior barriers and find courage to dissolve them, this is taking care.

When we learn to be gentle with ourselves, this is truly taking care.

When is the last time you acknowledged the feelings that are asking for your attention? How do you take care of yourself from the inside out so that you can fully experience life?

[kuya]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

Many years ago I was in a short but extremely violent relationship. Near the end I wrote this poem.

You rode her as a pony on the beach,
To dominate, with no control or care,
As something wild you did not dare to reach,
But tried to break what you could not repair.

But this mare carried you into the foam
And showed you the freedom of the sea
A sea of love which she could freely roam
And hold your head until you knew the way.

But your saddle made her sore, since made by man
And your bridle would not hold, since made for slaves
Your fear of love made you turn her to the sand
So she threw you off and returned,alone,into the waves

[Hippyman]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

There is such wisdom on this thread. Thank you all!:goodjob: :l

[Slaythefear]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

January 23, 2013...Be the best YOU!

On Being Yourself

(Anonymous)

You must learn
that you cannot be loved
by all people.

You can be the finest apple in the world?
ripe, juicy, sweet, succulent,
and offer yourself to all.

But you must remember that there
will always be people who
don?t like apples.

You must understand that if you are
the world?s finest apple
and someone you love
doesn?t like apples,
you have the choice of
becoming a banana.

But you must be warned
that if you choose
to become a banana,
you will be a second-rate banana.

But you can always be the finest apple!

You must realise that if you become
a second-rate banana,
there will always be people who
don?t like bananas.

Furthermore, you can spend your life
trying to become the best banana?
which is impossible if you are an apple.

Or, you can try again
to be the finest apple.

[paulywogg]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

im a fine ass apple! if ya dont like it forget you! i like it slay,how are you doing these days?youve been kinda quiet

[Hippyman]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

paulywogg;1449337 wrote: im a fine ass apple! if ya dont like it forget you! i like it slay,how are you doing these days?youve been kinda quiet

:H Pauly, At first I read your post to say "im as fine as apple pie! ??? But I guess you can be a FINE ASS APPLE if you wanta be...:H :H :H PS...note to self, HAVE GLASSES CHECKED...Soon!

[rednose]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

Hippyman;1436093 wrote: :l Oh what a great idea! I can not think of much in this world that I would not do to help others who suffer from this disease. I would give them all the gift of sobriety if I could. Since I can not do that, the least I can do is give unlimited amounts of ENCOURAGEMENT to them!

You are great with the encouragement. Thank you.

rednose

[Slaythefear]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

January 24, 2013...Reason, Season, Lifetime.

This was sent to me by someone new in my life yesterday and it had a profound effect by reaching inside to a place I've had walled off. It's effect is perfect with its meaning. I wanted to share it.

A R E A S O N A S E A S O N O R A L I F E T I M E

People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person/people (anyway); and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

[Slaythefear]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

Kuya, it was probably therapeutic to write that poem. It's more common than I had realized.

Paulywogg...inside my head a lot these days and working through some heartache and life lessons. If we live, we have challenges. Thanks for asking.:l:h:l

Love,

Slay

[paulywogg]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

glad you are doing good slay

[Slaythefear]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

Other's encouragement

I hope that someone else finds it in their heart to keep up this thread. For now I can no longer do so. If anyone wants to contribute to something they feel useful to others here, please post it daily for inspiration.

Love you,

Slay

[kuya]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

Slaythefear;1449690 wrote: Kuya, it was probably therapeutic to write that poem. It's more common than I had realized.


Slay

From literature I read twenty years ago one in three relationships involve domestic violence. The worst offenders are the police.

Why does it continue ........uuummmmmm ...go figure !

[Juja]

2013 Daily Encouragement Thread

Slaythefear;1450175 wrote: I hope that someone else finds it in their heart to keep up this thread. For now I can no longer do so. If anyone wants to contribute to something they feel useful to others here, please post it daily for inspiration.

Love you,

Slay

I understand the weight and pressure of maintaining this inspiring thread, but I'd like to know that you're okay.

Juja
:l:h XOXO