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Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

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    #121
    Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

    Day 35 ? booze free

    Evening Gang, if there is ever going to be a night to drink tonight ?will? be it. Had a massive blow up with the girly. I am not sure what is going on but she keeps saying sly comments under your breath at me and some other nasties LOL.

    I don?t want to be around her when she is like this, my parents are away so I am bunkered down in their house.

    I keep thinking booze will fix things, well at least numb the pain. While it is true it ?may? numb the pain it will only numb it for tonight then tomorrow will be back to square one. I drove past two bottle shops on the way here and almost stopped at both, although I didn?t.

    Sorry for the rant just feeling tempted right now. This is what I normally would do when this shit happened I would just go and drink. I remained calm and did not bight back at her ?attacks? took my laptop and left. I think it is the best for at least tonight.
    I hope everyone else is kicking butt!

    Cheers,
    Marty
    If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic.

    Comment

      #122
      Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

      martye;1459548 wrote: Day 35 ? booze free

      Evening Gang, if there is ever going to be a night to drink tonight ?will? be it. Had a massive blow up with the girly. I am not sure what is going on but she keeps saying sly comments under your breath at me and some other nasties LOL.

      I don?t want to be around her when she is like this, my parents are away so I am bunkered down in their house.

      I keep thinking booze will fix things, well at least numb the pain. While it is true it ?may? numb the pain it will only numb it for tonight then tomorrow will be back to square one. I drove past two bottle shops on the way here and almost stopped at both, although I didn?t.

      Sorry for the rant just feeling tempted right now. This is what I normally would do when this shit happened I would just go and drink. I remained calm and did not bight back at her ?attacks? took my laptop and left. I think it is the best for at least tonight.
      I hope everyone else is kicking butt!

      Cheers,
      Marty
      Wow Marty ! You are an inspiration. You've kept a good job and lots of friends. That is incredible to me. I lost so much over the years and currently just keep loosing people left right and center. Ive been noticing that my phone hardly ever rings anymore and the only texts i get are from my trading platform

      Peeked at your Facebook page and the cross fit looks terrific so you simply must keep going!! You are doing great despite the girl friend bump in the road ..:l

      PS: Never say, " Bring it! " because they will.......
      On My Own Way Out Since May 20, 2012
      *If you think poorly of yourself, you can fail with a clear conscience.
      https://www.mywayout.org/community/f11/tool-box-27556.html tool box
      https://www.mywayout.org/community/f19/newbies-nest-30074.html newbie nest

      Comment

        #123
        Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

        Hey Buddy,

        Can relate to the relationship 'trigger.' Granted I am only 15 days in, but EVERY single time I was tempted, it was due to a difficult situation/conversation with the Ex. (Who, BTW after 2 months finally stepped up yesterday an took ownership of his shitty actions over a significant period of time, so that was appreciated). It always take two to tango...

        I wonder if the adrenaline that comes from anger is a close cousin to the initial 'euphoria' of drinking. I think there might be something to this...I wonder if it's a trigger because of similarity in the chemical 'rush' that they both have, at least initially with the drink. Sadly, though the common denominator is the destruction of the one possessing it, and then subsequently those in close proximity!

        Also, your lady friend may not know WTH to do with Sober Martye. People who adapt to alcoholics over a significant period of time have problems of their own. Truly healthy people have to love you from a distance because they have to protect themselves from you. She may be going through a crisis of her own trying to adapt. We get used to chaos, no? And when you're used to it you panic in it's absence. This step you've taken has significant implications for the people in your life too. Growth is painful.

        I just want to encourage you to ride it out man. I have done it thus far every time and I haven't regretted it once. There are probably valuable lessons here for the two of you that can serve to 1) show the cracks in the relationship, 2) allow you an opportunity to really heal them, or 3) be an indicator that you need to reassess whether you should be together. All of them are important and you deserve Sober Martye's attention in the matter.

        One thing is for sure, giving in to it will not lead to anything good, and clearly you know this. No matter what, you have a world of support here. You have been a great inspiration to many and we will be here for you, promise. Take good care of yourself mate. Big :l
        "People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone."
        
? Audrey Hepburn, Actress and Philanthropist :heart:

        Comment

          #124
          Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

          That is a terrific post Persephone if i may say.

          How are you going there Marty?

          'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

          Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

          Comment

            #125
            Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

            @ Kradle123 ? Thanks for your post, I have always admired you and enjoy reading yours posts.

            @ Persephone1 ? What a great insightful post. Thanks for taking the time to write it. I received a SMS from her this morning saying how truly sorry she was, this does not happen often

            I do love her and am going to suggest some couples counselling as for the past 35 days it has been a different relationship as I am sober.

            Once again thanks for taking the time to write that post!

            @ Guitarista ? Thanks for your post. I love your user name. DO you play guitar? I have played for a long time now. And in regards to how I am doing well ? I AM STILL SOBER so life can throw what ever shit it wants at me I won?t give in. Thanks for your support and concern
            If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic.

            Comment

              #126
              Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

              Day 36 ? evening gang,

              And thanks for the few messages over night they were great. Well locked up in my parents? house I stayed clean even through my dad had a cold 6 pack waiting for him to return from holidays LOL.

              I am encouraged I can go through a ?hard? night and not drink, as I have said time and time again I won?t give in, I will remain strong.

              It is all a learning curve, I am learning more and more literally every hour it is definitely a long journey. I knew booze would not help me last night ?.. something I would have not known in my first 5 days and I may have caved that early on.

              Due to this I can?t stress enough to have a good network around you of friends, family, doctors? groups etc. If you are thinking about quitting get this in place ASAP so you can be successful!

              My hope is you are all kicking butt and thanks for the love.

              I will always remain sober no matter what life?s throws at me.

              Cheers
              Marty
              If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic.

              Comment

                #127
                Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

                Day 37 ? BOOZE FREE!

                What a day had to do 3 x presentations and deal with some bad media but I handled it all well. So much better than I would have if I was drunk or hung over.

                I cant express the joy and freedom that comes with not drinking. It is impossible to explain to people who still drink.

                If you follow my story and are at the start of the road of a AF life DO IT, and DO IT NOW, trust me life only gets better and better.

                I don?t want to paint a picture that it is all ?rainbows and unicorns? as it is not. It is hard and you need to be strong willed and really want the poison out of your life. But I can assure your life does get better. I never would have said that 37 days ago but it does.

                Some very simple benefits:
                You lose weight
                Your skin looks better
                You sleep better
                Your work will be better
                Your relationship?s will be better (you will deal with conflict easier)
                You will save money
                You won?t wake in the morning with that sinking feeling of WTF did I do last night
                You get fitter without trying
                Your body repairs itself as does your brain
                Productive socializing
                Avoid the ?McPilgimage? nothing like a big mac when you are pisssed
                Reclaim lost time
                Become and early riser
                That?s just to name a few

                Giving up alcohol is one of the easiest and hardest changes you can make in your life.
                It?s easy once you?ve established the right rules, configured your environment to support you, and set up useful boundaries of pain and pleasure to help direct you towards your goal. The hard parts are the social implications and fighting off the One Man Army that is your ego, with its barrage of self-limiting beliefs and drink requests.
                Giving up alcohol must be made priority number one in your life. A partial commitment is a commitment to failure. Even if you already don?t drink that often, it will be tempting to break your own rules when your friends call you up and invite you out. You?ve got to be willing to prioritize this decision in every situation where it?s relevant, even when that means Just Saying No to pub night.

                Ever notice how some people act as though the end of their relationship is the end of the world? It?s as if there?s no point in living if they can?t be with that person any longer. Yet other people come along and date that person who left them, eventually break up with them, and see it as hardly more than a blip on the radar.

                You may feel that it?s pretty easy to give up drinking. Or you may feel that it?s an addiction with a stranglehold on your life. Either way, there is no inherent magnitude to this task. It?s as big or as small as you make it.

                No matter how much you want to tell yourself how hard it is, nobody?s ever going to claim that learned helplessness was the secret to their success. The most effective way forward is to not only make quitting drinking a top priority, but to think, talk, and act like it can be done.

                Whether you view it as a spiritual separation, or merely conceptual, we all have more than one self. There?s the ?Mmmmm?beeeer?? self, and the impartial spectator that can detach from and observe this desire.

                Let the latter voice be your authority. You?re allowed to want a drink as much as you?re allowed to choose not to have one.                 There?s tremendous power in observing your thoughts as a third party. The impartial spectator can feel the heat without getting burned.

                When in doubt, let it be there. No matter how bad the storm seems, it will pass.

                I hope everyone is still kicking butt!
                I will NOT now or EVER give in!
                Cheers,
                Marty
                If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic.

                Comment

                  #128
                  Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

                  Love reading about those benefits Martye

                  Thanks
                  Patrice

                  Comment

                    #129
                    Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

                    Day 38 ? Booze free!

                    Evening gang. How are we all on this wonderful day?

                    Well just checking in on my 38th day booze free. Longest is 15+ years. As I keep saying things just keep getting better and better.

                    I am getting stronger doing my crossfit! I think I am addicted to it LOL better to be addicted to fitness then booze. I am down 8kgs since I started my booze free journey so of course that helps with self-esteem.

                    I had to miss my smart recovery meeting last week so I am looking forward to it this Thursday! Cant wait, I love the support and learning I gain from such a group. If you are not in a group of people with a common goal get in one. While this forum is fantastic ? face to face meetings are fantastic as well.

                    If you are reading this at the start of your journey, quit, trust me life gets better, much better.

                    How is everyone else going? Kicking butt? Can I help in any way?

                    I will remain strong and continue to kick arse!

                    Cheers,
                    Marty
                    If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic.

                    Comment

                      #130
                      Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

                      Jeez Marty..... 38 days....man they have flown by ( well for me :H:H)

                      Lovin yer work, mate , you are aceing this, and why not? It doesn't have to be a gloomy trial, it's all about attitude.....and yours has been right from the start.

                      Keep on trucking :h

                      Comment

                        #131
                        Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

                        Hey matey,

                        Goin' through LOTS of changes over here...just wanted to send a note of thanks for the tip on Smart Recovery. I had never even heard of this. I totally dig that it's NOT AA structured. I found one 40 minutes away from me & available 3 times weekly. I am really looking forward to going to this. Forums, blogs, books and the like are great, but I need face to face human interaction too, ha! The next is available on Sunday and I plan to attend. THANKS!
                        Hope all is well with you. Take good care of yourself...:l
                        "People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone."
                        
? Audrey Hepburn, Actress and Philanthropist :heart:

                        Comment

                          #132
                          Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

                          Persephone1;1461848 wrote: .just wanted to send a note of thanks for the tip on Smart Recovery. I had never even heard of this. I totally dig that it's NOT AA structured.

                          Fantastic, Smart recovery is amazing.

                          SMART Recovery emphasizes personal choice and responsibility for one's actions. It is up to each addict to determine what is best for him or her, not have the choice forced upon him or her. This point is in particularly strong contrast with AA's emphasis on ."powerless" Rather, we believe strongly in rational analysis leading to freedom for the individual and his or her empowerment through self-knowledge leading to control over one's decisions.
                          If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic.

                          Comment

                            #133
                            Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

                            Day 39 ? BOOZE FREE!

                            Evening gang just reporting in that I am 39 days! That?s right 39 days booze free.

                            For those that say stopping is hard ?. Hmm I guess it is. But it is only as hard as you let your brain believe it is hard.

                            The brain is an amazing instrument is your quit attempt, train it right before and during your quit attempt and it will be ?easy?

                            I have no doubt at all that no matter what life throws at me I will never drink again as I have made it easy to quit by training my brain to believe it is easy.

                            Work on the brain before you quit and continue to work on it and it will stop your desire to drink. Train it to believe drinking is truly stupid and your body will follow.

                            I hope everyone is kicking butt?

                            I will never give in train your brain!
                            Cheers,
                            Marty
                            If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic.

                            Comment

                              #134
                              Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

                              Train your brain :H

                              Absolutely marty - like it!

                              I am too impressed with your absolute believe that you have given up AL for life. Must admit that I find difficult being able to say "never ever again" ... but perhaps in the same way, that if I lived to 100 and never smoked another cigarette (I smoked for near 15 years) then I'd be like "yeah, so what?" But I will never say I will never smoke again. Perhaps... Still... loving your attitude

                              Comment

                                #135
                                Day One and onward: The Diary of a chronic Aussie Drinker

                                martye;1460003 wrote:

                                @ Guitarista ? Thanks for your post. I love your user name. DO you play guitar? I have played for a long time now. And in regards to how I am doing well ? I AM STILL SOBER                                 so life can throw what ever shit it wants at me I won?t give in. Thanks for your support and concern
                                Hey Marty!

                                Yep, a serious musician here.

                                Loving your thread and your posts. Thanks.

                                G bloke.

                                'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

                                Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

                                Comment

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