Hi im new on here, i have tried AA loads of times before but cant seem to adapt to their way of life. i know i have a drink problem because when i start i dont want to stop, but the fact i manage to hold a job down cons me into thinking its ok to keep binging. I would love to be able to lead a productive life and drink socially once a week because family and friends all do their social stuff over a drink. Desperately looking for a way to moderate because feel like im stuck in a rut!!
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
Firstly Welcome !!!! Great to have you here!
AA is not for everyone, there are other meetings you can consider like smart recovery etc.
I to have / had a drinking problem at least 24 beers a night all while succeeding and working in a high end well-paying job!
I too would love to drink socially once a week but I cant. It sounds like you are in the same basket. You cant socially drink you can’t moderate.
I think it is some time for some soul searching to see what you REALLY want. My guess is from your post is that you will have to give away the booze altogether.
Keep posting and learning, it will be interesting to follow your journey.If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic. -
keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
thankyou for your reply! its a very hard pill to swallow though. I wonder if, after an extended period of not drinking, say 4/5 months I could try and drink in moderation again. if that didnt work then I suppose i'd have to admit defeat..Comment
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
It seems you are admitting defeat before you have even started. You are just giving yourself another excuse to drink. Most people could quit for four months if they knew at the end of the 4 months they could just go back and get pissed again!
And yes it is a hard pill to swallow, not as hard as putting poision in your body every day in the form of booze.If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic.Comment
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
Ooooohhhh.... I think that one A LOT!southampton mike;1460160 wrote: thankyou for your reply! its a very hard pill to swallow though. I wonder if, after an extended period of not drinking, say 4/5 months I could try and drink in moderation again. if that didnt work then I suppose i'd have to admit defeat..
Fact is only you can know. But first things first: don't drink.
I'm 2 and a half months AF. My thinking has often been about whether I can bring it back into my life at a time where i feel i've "got better" or "sorted it out" etc etc... but then here's the thing.. perhaps I prefer me AF, than me with AL?
Perhaps I ENJOY being out with friends, at parties, social events etc and with my self-esteem high, as opposed to low, I embrace who I am without the need - or desire - for AL.
Also... I / we cannot forget what brought us here. I tried modding a few months back but went back to my old ways of drinking (every night, drinking to get drunk) faster than you could say "pint please" to a barman. So I'm hoping - and working on - getting to a point where I just go "Booze? Why bother?"
But as I say - only you can know. It is your way out. Your journey.
RCComment
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
good point, maybe i need to just accept it now, alcohol is not right for meComment
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
why is it not right for you? Why not just keep drinking?If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic.Comment
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
thanks running courage, sounds like we have similair patterns. this is day one without alcohol for me, so watch this space :-)Comment
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
because i cant seem to moderate it/ control it how i would like to, and it often leads to me picking up other substances. and as mentioned above in the other forum users post, it really effects my self esteem. im going to try being teetotal!Comment
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
It seems we have found your answersouthampton mike;1460178 wrote: because i cant seem to moderate it/ control it how i would like to, and it often leads to me picking up other substances. and as mentioned above in the other forum users post, it really effects my self esteem. im going to try being teetotal!
Try and go and see a good doc to discuss your plans
If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic.Comment
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
Thanks, i am looking into smart recovery meetings tooComment
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
Hi Mike,
Are you from Southampton, Hampshire?
If you are, your doctor can give you the phone number for EDP, an association for drink and drug addictions, their pamphlet is normally in the waiting room at the health centre.
You'll get the weekly services of an ex-addict, one to one, who can help you and give you a plan to cut down or stop drinking, worked for me!It's not what you drink, it's how much!Comment
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
It is a very daunting task to tell yourself all of a sudden you are going to quit something that has been such a big part of your life for so long. So don't look too far into the future right now. You have the rest of your life to worry about the rest of your life. When you are ready to quit, focus on each day, hour, or minute - whatever you need to do. Tell yourself that right in that moment you are not going to have a drink.southampton mike;1460160 wrote: thankyou for your reply! its a very hard pill to swallow though. I wonder if, after an extended period of not drinking, say 4/5 months I could try and drink in moderation again. if that didnt work then I suppose i'd have to admit defeat..Well it's all right now. I've learned my lesson well. You see you can't please everyone, so you've got to please yourself.Comment
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
Good morning Southampton and welcome welcome ! :welcome:
This is an extraordinary place you've landed in and I guarantee you will never look at yourself or the way you use AL again.
I have 2 links in my signature you should check out. They are super helpful when u start out.
Stay close and read read read! That is very important.
:l
PS I stopped for 3-4 months in 2008.....took me year to come back here. :hOn My Own Way Out Since May 20, 2012
*If you think poorly of yourself, you can fail with a clear conscience.
https://www.mywayout.org/community/f11/tool-box-27556.html tool box
https://www.mywayout.org/community/f19/newbies-nest-30074.html newbie nestComment
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keep thinking: it'll be ok this time..
Hi Mike. I'm in the same boat as you. Its hard to stop after 1 or 2 I think the same I hold down my job and do everything I'm responsible for but why sometimes I feel I'm ok but then can't stop after a few. Its really tough sometimes but think of the bad stuff that goes along with it. Who wants to feel like that? I'm real sick of feeling bad all the time I keep thinking of thatComment
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