Made it to day thirteen but starting again

[sally114]

I was so proud of being Af for 13 days, I loved the way I was beginning to feel - I just know I cannot moderate. It was doing something really stupid that hurt my family that started me on this journey a fortnight ago. I seemed so calm so determined. I was waiting for the cds and Kudzu then all my resolve just disappeared. I visited my sister in London last Thursday all ready for a huge black tie family party on St Patricks night. Thursday we went to the pub and I managed to limit what I had after telling myself all the way there I would drink coke only - but no had to have a drink. Friday night lasted into Saturday morning with limited damage. We arrived at the party and at 6.30 and wham I have no idea how I even got back to the house and woke up to find that my partner had spent the night in the car due to an incident with the host, he was terribly upset and I was oblivious to the fact that he wasn't even in bed!! I just keep thinking if only I hadn't drunk too much - but of course that doesn't help. I haven't had a drink for three days ( not that I needed to as I only sobered up sometime Monday!) It is all such a waste as tonight I can't sleep again it's 4am and I have to pick myself up and start all over again. I spent all day today in an important meeting and was able to give about an hours worth of attention.

At the bottom it just looks such a long way up, but I guess as 'Irish Lady' says in an earlier post its about taking that first step and listening to the good messages inside. I know I have the answers within.

Sorry for feeling sorry for myself but it really just helps to write it down and know that so many of you understand and do not judge

[Determinator]

Made it to day thirteen but starting again

Sally, I was right there coincidentally 13 days ago myself. Nobody said this would be easy. Cheers to you for not giving up!

[ScoobyDoo]

Made it to day thirteen but starting again

Sally, it sounds like all of this was a good thing and that you've grown from the experience on St Pats day. Hang in there, and just jump back on that horse (or back into the pool).

You won't be judged here. Not a chance

*hug*
Doo

[Ripley]

Made it to day thirteen but starting again

Sally - 13 days without kudzu and cds is a bloody huge acheivement my love - more than I have EVER done. So, know you know moderation is maybe not for you.... well that's a good thing to know, right?

I was all over the place before i got my MWO goodies. I am doing the whole programme, even the topa, and am much better for it. I wanted very much to go off the rails on Sunday due to a major domestic crisis but only managed a major binge session of 3 glasses of wine!!!! hahaha! (god bless topamax!)

The point is to learn from this. it is hard. alcohol is an addictive substance that messes with our brain chemistry. plus we have really bad habits. plus we don't feel good about ourselves as people. so there is a lot to do here really isn't there?

stick with this and keep coming here. it will be ok. Kate x

[Beaches]

Made it to day thirteen but starting again

Sally I agree that 13 days is amazing and to have the strength to be able to do that is wonderful. You have learned more about yourself and don't get down just stand right back up, stand tall and proud and move on. Know that you can do this and be the person you want to be and know that we are here for you.

[Breez]

Made it to day thirteen but starting again

Baby steps, baby steps and the next thing you know you'll be running marathons.

[lorisunshine]

Made it to day thirteen but starting again

Good morning Sally,
Welcome to MWO and let me tell you, 13 days AF is a grand achievement. So you tripped, just pick yourself up off the floor and start again. You may have to do that again, but each time you learn one more thing.

The MWO support system is really helpful in your journey, but in the end, you are making all the choices.
Hang in there baby,
Lori