Rebuilding your life

[moni]

Has anybody successfully done this after quitting?
I'm scared it may be too late.
I don't want to go into too much detail. Thankfully I do have a job, it could be better though. I have no partner, live in rented property and not a very good income. I feel I will never own a property and at this stage never meet anybody. I am very late 30's (on the border.. literally). It gets me down so much recently and while I am going to counselling to work through a lot of things, I still don't feel any hope for the future. I feel stuck.

[K9Lover]

Rebuilding your life

Hi Moni!

Why would it be "too late" for you? If you're still breathing, there's still hope. I am 40 years old, single, rent my house, don't LOVE my job, need a raise....but guess what? I am HAPPY. I focus on what I DO have, instead of what I don't have. I figure that if I'm not happy within myself, then nothing else will make me happy anyway. I know it sounds kind of fake, but that's how I feel. I am proud of the changes I've made. I'm proud of how far I've come. Maybe that doesn't look like "success" to others, but it's all I need.

You'll get there too...be patient. You'll get "un-stuck" soon

Love,
K9

[Supercrew]

Rebuilding your life

I have successfully done it after quitting. I got healthy, fixed my relationship, fixed my finances, changed career and started a new business. I just focused on what I wanted and took action daily to get there.

It's been the most rewarding chapter of my life.

[Wagoneer]

Rebuilding your life

It is never too late to start rebuilding your life. Ever. You are on your way. Just like the very wise K9 said, focus on what you do have. When you stop drinking, any day above ground is a good day!

Best of luck - you can totally do this!

[Hippyman]

Rebuilding your life

I'm being successful at rebuilding a happy life now that I am no longer drinking alcohol! I feel so free and so grateful. It's like everything just seems to be working out for me. For many months, that was my Mantra...EVERYTHING always works out for me now that I'm sober. It sure seemed to help me to repeat that to myself OVER & OVER! Now it's my reality! You can do it too. Set your intention on joy and joy will soon be yours!

[mylife]

Rebuilding your life

Supercrew;1479529 wrote: I have successfully done it after quitting. I got healthy, fixed my relationship, fixed my finances, changed career and started a new business. I just focused on what I wanted and took action daily to get there.

It's been the most rewarding chapter of my life.

I have heard this over and over again from people who stopped drinking. It can help you change your life. Hang in there! :l

[moni]

Rebuilding your life

Thanks for the positivity guys. I know it won't happen over night, I just sometimes feel it's one step forward and two steps back. I should be proud. I'm 124 days AF, I'm studying and working hard. I'm getting good results in University and working 9 hours a day also. Unfortunately I very much focus on the negative so much. I think it's something I brought with me from my drinking days. I completely lack confidence and find it hard to motivate myself in other ways. I know I can motivate myself given the fact I gave up alcohol.

[Supercrew]

Rebuilding your life

If you know you are focusing on the negative, quit doing it. Because you will get what you focus on. You are doing great at 124 days, why not put some positive goals on paper and start focusing on what you want your life to look like next week, next month, next year, and next decade. Then focus on ways to accomplish your goals.

My goals first revoloved around just daily happiness and healthfulness which turn in to a new career and a new lifestyle. You can do it!!

[kuya]

Rebuilding your life

Moni.....you will start feeling physically and emotionally better now.

Your life sounds good to me

Try volunteering for people less fortunate, this is a good way to get a new perspective on your life.

Also ......change your signature.....it is kinda depressing and actually only the effect of alcohol on the brain rather than the truth IMO.

[Hippyman]

Rebuilding your life

kuya;1479610 wrote: Moni.....you will start feeling physically and emotionally better now.

Your life sounds good to me

Try volunteering for people less fortunate, this is a good way to get a new perspective on your life.

Also ......change your signature.....it is kinda depressing and actually only the effect of alcohol on the brain rather than the truth IMO.

Listen to these wise words. Kuya is spot on! Volunteering is so good for my feelings of self esteem and a great way to make new friends. :l

[Pinecone]

Rebuilding your life

Hi Moni,

Take stock of the good things you have going on right now. You are getting good grades, working alot and have just moved, which is a very stressful process. On top of that you are over 100 days AF (Great job!). Those are the things you very wisely posted in your second post in this thread. The good stuff.

With all this going on in your life right now, you have earned the right to be tired. Are you getting enough rest? When life gets on your case, go back to basics: food, water, excercise, rest. That's what works for me.

To answer your original question, yes it is entirely possible to rebuild your life. Take some small daily steps in the direction you want to go and you will get there some day!

[madmans]

Rebuilding your life

Hi Moni 124 days Af is really great and each day more will make you stronger , it takes time to become the person we once were before AL took control of our life and i know how much life here revolves around drinking but that life never made me happy and it's not a life i'd ever want to go back to.
By getting sober i, like so many people here have reclaimed their life but stopping drinking is only the start we have to learn how to cope with the ups and downs in life with out AL , we each must find our own way to deal with that , what works for me will not work for another.
I have no doubt you can rebuild your life by staying sober .MM

[HealthyLiving]

Rebuilding your life

I agree with everyone. Today is a new day. Start a gratitude list of all the things that you are grateful for. Even the smallest things. For example, it is sunny today. There are beautiful flowers outside my building. Bless what you have and more will follow.

[Change]

Rebuilding your life

Hippyman;1479554 wrote: For many months, that was my Mantra...EVERYTHING always works out for me now that I'm sober. It sure seemed to help me to repeat that to myself OVER & OVER!

Really? Is it as simple as that? (seriously, just wondering, cos i'm wondering why i always seem to be unhappy).

[moni]

Rebuilding your life

So basically a list of short term goals and longterm goals.
I very much want to get involved in volunteer work but unfortunately all my free time until end of May is dedicated to study.

I know what I want to achieve but just find it so overwhelming.
I want/need to lose weight for example but don't have time to go to the gym as often as I should.
I want to own my own property (even a small little place) but will never be given a mortgage based on my current salary unless (a) I get a better paid job (b) meet a significant other and we eventually go halves. Therefore - I need to get a better paid job but we're in the middle of a recession and that's near impossible. I could meet somebody but I vowed a long time to never put myself in a position where I'm relying on a man for anything.