Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Parents of alcoholics / ADHD/ Aspergers

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    Parents of alcoholics / ADHD/ Aspergers

    :new::


    :My son has tried suicide many times. Been in jail numerous times. Won't take his meds for ADHD other issues he has. So he self medicates with alcohol. Last time he tore the ligaments in his hand & fingers going thru a glass store window. His alcohol level was 3.999.

    It took him 12 hours to sober up in the hospital almost didn't make it, plus by the time he was found at 1:30 am he had lost a lot of blood from the injury. Police took him to the hospital thank God.

    Fast foreword he is in jail again. I will not bail him out I pd for his surgery. He had just got out of rehab for 3 weeks ago began drinking again.

    The cycle goes over & over. I don't know if I am torturing myself by hoping when he hit bottom he will ask for help. 20 years is such a long time to watch my son suffer thru so many unspeakable things. I can't talk to him is usually unreasonable out of control so I never know what is true. He is a master manulipulator uses others to find places to live, till the police are called. usually drunk & domestic charges. He has been out of contact many times. I have no support from family they all hate him including his own father. I accept he is a alcoholic with mental issues that doesn't make him any less worthy of my love. I tell him as often as I can too! I get so much flak from family it's so unnecessary.
    They can't see beyond their own hate.

    Well I guess u get the idea. The whole mess is co convoluted its impossible to ever know the truth. Other than he drinks to excess.

    I love my son very much yet he is treated by police like garbage. He is not, he deserves a better life. A homeless dog has more hope for survival and a better life than my son.

    It's so painful & there is nothing I can do he is an adult. He has too many emotional problems. He had a good contractor business at one time. Now he can't get a job, especially with only one functional hand.

    Sorry didn't mean to rant on & on....
    Yankee

    #2
    Parents of alcoholics / ADHD/ Aspergers

    Hi Yankee,
    I am sorry to read of the troubles that your son is having. Have you checked out any groups like Al-ANON? Alcoholism is a tricky little demon and unfortunately it affects everyone involved in some form or another. Sometimes tuff love is often required in certain situations. No your son isn't garbage, he is a living human being who has a drinking problem compounded by other struggles. Unfortunately I am afraid that each one of us has our own rock bottom. I am sure that someone else with more knowledge about other forums or groups that would be tremendously helpful for you. So just sit tight, try to get some rest and breathe. At this point all you can do is secure your own oxygen mask by way of taking care of yourself.
    "Sometimes the strongest people are the ones who love beyond all faults, cry behind closed doors and fight battles that nobody knows about".
    ~Author Unknown
    AF since February 4, 2013

    Comment


      #3
      Parents of alcoholics / ADHD/ Aspergers

      how to help

      I really don't believe in tough love or the need to hit rock bottom.
      I suggest you read a new book called Clean by David Sheff. He argues against the current model of treating addiction and calls for treatment based on evidence. His son was a drug addict.
      There are some medications that can help with severe alcohol problems. You should check the medication section of this website.
      Good luck and go your own way with this. Believe in your own insights.

      Comment


        #4
        Parents of alcoholics / ADHD/ Aspergers

        It sounds like you are handling the situation very well given the circumstances. As a mother of two sons, my heart bleeds for you! Paying for hospital but not bailing him out of jail is what I would do.....At least in jail he cannot get access to AL.

        I don't have any answers for you...I am an adult child of an alcoholic and one myself, but I don't have children who are. I would definitely do what both nancy and oneredshoe suggested....go to Al Anon and do your own research....it takes work to find the solution that is right for you and your son and it sounds like you are taking that path . . . . you came here looking for advice!! That is a great step.

        Well wishes to you and your son!
        I just won't anymore

        Comment


          #5
          Parents of alcoholics / ADHD/ Aspergers

          Hi Yankee: I caught this from over in "Meds," where Bleep put up a link. Quite a few of us have found that baclofen can relieve the compulsion to drink. I suggest you order a copy of Dr. Olivier Ameisen's book. Here the Amazon link: Amazon.com: Heal Thyself: A Doctor at the Peak of His Medical Career, Destroyed by Alcohol--and the Personal Miracle That Brought Him Back (9780374532208): Olivier Ameisen: Books

          If you read and do some research about baclofen, you'll get an idea of what it is and how it works.

          However, Al Anon would give you some great tools, because, in the end, this is your son's problem. It is not your problem. If he wants to get well, baclofen can be a mind-blowing re-organization about the entire paradigm of addiction, and getting free from alcohol. But it's got its own set of issues and considerations. It can help your son. But he has to want to help himself.

          Hopefully, he will be as thrilled (and determined) as most of us have been, when we discovered that there is another way out. Best of luck. Take care of yourself, first, okay?
          "Wherever you are is the entry point." --Kabir

          Comment


            #6
            Parents of alcoholics / ADHD/ Aspergers

            As the wife of an addict an an alcoholic I feel for you. Watching someone destroy themselves like that is like seeing them get run over by a truck time after time and you are powerless to stop it. Very devastating to the mind, body, and soul. I have been in your place for years. I agree about getting him some med. An excellent idea. If he will take them and want to get out of the mess his life is.
            Keep up your head. My heart goes out to you.
            No matter how far you go or how fast you run, you can't get away from yourself. ....said at an AA meeting. It stuck with me.

            Comment


              #7
              Parents of alcoholics / ADHD/ Aspergers

              He may no have to hit rock bottom, but he does have to get to a place where he really, truly wants to get well. Also different people have different levels of rock bottom, doesn't have to be that bad.
              I used the Sinclair Method to beat my alcoholic drinking.

              Drank within safe limits for almost 2 years

              AF date 22/07/13

              Comment

              Working...
              X