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I just don't think I can do this

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    I just don't think I can do this

    Okay, I know that is a bad attitude....since getting the book and the cd's I have only had one night that I did not drink. (It has been a week). It's like the more I think about NOT drinking, the more I want it. Drank two bottles of wine last night. I don't even remember going to bed. I know my husband is upset with me, and this morning I had suicidal thoughts. But am moving around now, and will get on with my day. Saw where SeaBreeze had 100 days. That is just amazing.

    I called my Dr. for Topa but he has not called me back. I take an antidepressant so I bet he won't give it to me. I ordered supps but they have not come yet.

    What am I going to do. I hate my life because of me. I watch the soaps sometimes and they sip champagne, or in the movies they sip wine while tossing a salad. I look at the glass and think I would down it like iced tea.

    Oh well, I am rambling. Guess it is just frustration.:upset:

    #2
    I just don't think I can do this

    It's hard Piddypat.
    Keep trying though.
    It's worth it.

    Comment


      #3
      I just don't think I can do this

      Piddy .. you can do this. You just have to find out what works for you and take it from there ...

      I'm finding the Kudzu is really helping me this time around to be able to mod. Far from where I want to be, but I'm making really great strides for days ...

      I'm a "sipper" in training ... wanna join?

      WTE

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        #4
        I just don't think I can do this

        piddy -

        Like they say, you can do it! Dont think about not drinking for the rest of your life or even for 30 days, it is to overwhelming. Take it day by day..just keep telling yourself I am not drinking today, dont know what tomorrow holds...and so on...YOU ARE WORTH IT!
        We live our lives in chains and dont even know we have the key!

        Comment


          #5
          I just don't think I can do this

          Thank you all. I have been sitting here staring at the screen hoping someone would write back. You are right, I am obsessed with thinking about not drinking forever. I just wish I could quit thinking about it all together.

          Comment


            #6
            I just don't think I can do this

            AWWW Piddypat, I send you lots of hugs :l

            I'm sure you can do it! We have all had those same feelings! I does get better. Hang in there. There are wonderful people here to help you. Me included!

            Take care and be good to yourself!

            Best
            "It wasn't all I wanted, but all I could stand!":bigwink: Alcohol free since April 8, 2008

            Comment


              #7
              I just don't think I can do this

              Hey Piddy pat....chin up sweetie....at the start, there are bound to be all sorts of wacky thoughts running around your head...this is a new way of living that you have to get used to, it may take time.
              Have you tried the Allen Carr book? I haven't read it myself, but Have read MUCH about it from the guys here, and it apparently helps you to switch the way you think about booze to make the idea of abstaining seem more like a fantastic idea, than something to be mourned for the rest of your life....this sort of thinking seems to be the key to succesful and happy AF days I have found.
              I struggled a LOT for the first few weeks AF, until I read a lot of the long term abbers posts, that described thoughts from the book, as well as many of their own on approaches to this that had made the transition from drunk to sober that much easier...

              Give yourself a bit of a break dear...ease yourself in, and let your head get used to this without having to freak out....you say that you obsess about alcohol now? In a way, that is a bit of a good thing, as it makes you aware of your drinking patterns, and will alert you to the times when you feel the NEED...Use these obsessive thoughts for good, and see if they can help you with your journey rather than making you just 'stay at home' if you see what I mean......You are moving forwards, even if it doesn't feel much like it....these are just the first tentative baby steps....

              Stay healthy
              Weemelon xx

              Comment


                #8
                I just don't think I can do this

                Piddy, I promise you that you can do this! In the beginning I thought about drinking all the time and was constantly keeping myself busy for a distraction. As the time goes on you will think about it less and less .....

                Love & Hugs :h :l :h










                sigpicXXX

                Comment


                  #9
                  I just don't think I can do this

                  I am finding that the kudzu is really beneficial in large doses. I'm taking 3,000 mgs a day and it definately helps me from drinking myself into oblivion every night. I'm still drinking.......too much by many standards but I'm doing so much better than before.

                  You can do this Piddypat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                  :thumbsup :thumbsup :thumbsup :thumbsup
                  :h :h :h :h

                  Comment


                    #10
                    I just don't think I can do this

                    Hang in there Piddy! Just like my kitty! (ha). We start out with one step forward and two steps back. Then, sometimes its a couple of steps forward. Eventually, we're gonna be miles away from all this. Just keep trying - we all are. Sending warm thoughts your way.

                    Journey

                    Comment


                      #11
                      I just don't think I can do this

                      i really know how you feel piddypat. Its not easy but it is worth it. Try. I am feeling particuarly morose tonight so probably not much help to you, but you are amongst good peoplle here who will always be there if you reach out. Take care, Bella xx

                      Comment


                        #12
                        I just don't think I can do this

                        Hi Piddy

                        Like betty i preferred to keep the distractions going for a few weeks...and still do to a point..or ad i have saif before FORWARD PLANNING for the "bewitching hour"

                        Well here we are on F riday ..the start of the weekend and the start of the "shall I shant I" talk fro so many of us!!

                        So for me I plan the evening...Tonight its some time on this site...shower and ..light the fire, candles on ...chinese take away...Well I have walked and done keep fit so needed an Alcohol free reward... relax with Alcohol free hubby...i think we are on day 40 or 41..started before LENT( got a few days in before Ash Wednesday).doing this partly for charity,,,and of course to give myself 40 days alcohol free(That was the original Goal.. hubby , nyself and a friend set up)...........yipee we all three got here!!

                        I will carry on for a while as feel well, fit and mentally positive. Still hope to moderate but not sure when I will test the water. This is my first serious attempt at moderating and my longest time AF in 2 years...managed 30 days 2 years back.

                        All that I can really say is i wont drink tonight..as evening all planned out!!Its Also comforting to know that if I slip up or cant cope with moderating then i get come her for the support .Without this site i doubt i would have achieved my 40 day goal....

                        SO A BIG THANKYOU TO SO MANY WHO BARE THEIR SOULS ON HERE..IT IS AN ENORMOUS HELP TO KNOW I AM NOT ALONE..

                        Goof Luck to you all Regards Cassy

                        Comment


                          #13
                          I just don't think I can do this

                          Piddy:
                          When I asked my doctor for Topa I took the book in with me, and a copy of the initial medical tests/reports, some news articles from the Internet, etc. I went armed with info. I did not trust myself to be able to explain the program so I let the experts do the talking. I gave it all to my doctor so she could read it and get back to me later. If you doctor says no, go to another one and go armed with info.
                          I should tell you that the Topa has helped me but I have not been able to stop drinking completey. Maybe I'm just too scared to, I don't know. It's hard to imagine giving it up completely. However, I am comfortable knowing that I have slowed WAY down in my drinking patterns. That is a positive step for me. If I thought that would have had to stop completely, I may never have even started trying to slow down. Sounds horrible, but that's the truth.
                          Best of luck to you this weekend.
                          Learning to live life on the outside of a bottle. :flower:

                          Comment


                            #14
                            I just don't think I can do this

                            Piddy,

                            Whenever I think of never drinking again I get really overwhelmed. So what I've been trying to do is just think about today. One day at a time...I drank a bottle of wine last night after four days AF. I'm disappointed in myself, but I don't want to get myself all worked up and upset about it because that's self-defeating. It will put me in an even worse spot, and I'll be more likely to give into my cravings. So I'm focusing on tonight.

                            You can do this! One day AF is a step in the right direction. Two days AF even better. If you weaken and drink, then just pick yourself up the next day and start over with a hopeful attitude. Any change that you can make in your drinking habit is a very very positive thing.

                            Keep logging on. Reading posts is the best therapy in the world. Great people here!!!

                            Julie

                            Comment


                              #15
                              I just don't think I can do this

                              Hi Piddy~

                              Just hang in there! It's not easy.

                              You need to change your mindset. Take babysteps. In Monthly Abs we talked about saying "I choose not to drink today" rather than "I can never drink again". Setting little goals & rewarding yourself. It's the little things that will make the bigger changes. You can do it one step at a time. But you need to want it bad enough. And no one gets it right the first time. Trust me.
                              :flower: Change a life; make someone feel important. ................. ........................ ..................... ........................ ................. ....... sigpic

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