Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Feeling frustrated

Collapse
X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 2
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous 1 2 template Next
    #1

    Feeling frustrated

    I want to drink!
    I'm not drinking, but I can't stop thinking about it.
    I don't want to be an alcoholic, I just want to drink!
    Where's my freaking antabuse, I better take 2!!

    I feel sort of angry that I can't drink. I know I should be happy that I don't HAVE to drink anymore, but that's how I feel.

    Scary time for me. I want these feelings to stop!
    Day 1 again 11/5/19
    Goal 1: 7 days :heartbeat:
    Goal 2: 14 days :happy2:
    Goal 3: 21 days :happy2:
    11/27/19: messed up but back on track
    12/14/19: bad doozy but back on track

    One day at a time.
    Tags: None
    #2
    Feeling frustrated

    you are like a toddler taking your baby steps Nursey,its difficult,your feeling awkward and unbalanced but stick at it you will get stronger and soon it will become second nature.Under a year AF I reckon we are still only finding our feet.You can do it .
    AF since october 8th 2012:new

    How to get Alcohol free in 6 minutes :H
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ow0lr63y4Mw

    Comment

      #3
      Feeling frustrated

      Nursie;1500828 wrote: I want to drink!
      I'm not drinking, but I can't stop thinking about it.
      I don't want to be an alcoholic, I just want to drink!
      Where's my freaking antabuse, I better take 2!!

      I feel sort of angry that I can't drink. I know I should be happy that I don't HAVE to drink anymore, but that's how I feel.

      Scary time for me. I want these feelings to stop!
      I felt the same way the day of my dad's funeral. It was beyond oppressive to go back to his empty house afterwards. It was the first time since I've started Campral that I was truly craving a drink. I went to a drugstore to buy a pack of cigarettes (trading one bad habit for another), but I stopped at the DVD rental kiosk instead and just rented a pile of movies to distract me and get me through the evening/night.
      In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

      Comment

        #4
        Feeling frustrated

        I totally understand, Nursie. Some days this just sucks, but getting thru it now means you won't have to do it more down the road. It's hard to work our way thru this but it is so worth it. Hang in there no matter what and no matter who. You will be so glad you did. Getting buzzed up is not the answer to anything ( I found that out the hard way). You are with friends who know how you are feeling...you are not alone. Take care...Byrdie
        All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
        Tool Box
        Newbie's Nest

        Comment

          #5
          Feeling frustrated

          Hi Nursie and :l

          Is there something behind the desire to escape ? Usually there is a background story running that is the trigger.

          If not then treat it as healing feelings.

          Between one and four months sober I had roller coaster emotions, for days at a time. Byrdie knows because I bored her rigid with them !

          Suddenly, at four months, they stopped, and have stayed even since. Now I am having another unsettled patch......but I look at it as A GOOD THING. Soon I will be feeling even better!

          PM me if you want to chat

          Comment

            #6
            Feeling frustrated

            Nursie,

            I felt something like you are feeling a couple of days ago --- just wanted to drink and get it over with. I was tired of the "work" of not drinking. But I did what you just did -- came here and posted -- and it really helped.

            You aren't alone, what you are experiencing isn't weird, it is ok to feel like you do, everyone here and in your family cares about you and is behind you, and these feelings will pass.

            Maybe you could go back and read some of your own posts. You have been so happy and upbeat several times recently. You are glad you don't drink and like you said above, you aren't drinking now.
            And you won't. We are DONE WITH THAT!!!

            Maybe you could tell us more about you. What are your hobbies and interests? I would be interested in knowing more about what makes Nursie tick .

            Hang in there, friend. This won't last long. Love, NS :h

            Comment

              #7
              Feeling frustrated

              I guess what we are all waiting for is when it becomes second nature. That takes a lot of time or so i've heard. I guess if you've been doing something for years on end, it only makes sense that it would take years to 'undo' the habitual thinking. This gives me hope that it just works it's way through us and eventually dies off. Hope so.
              Tipplerette

              I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

              "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
              ? Lao-Tzu

              Comment

                #8
                Feeling frustrated

                Ahhhh, thanks guys.
                My stepmother passed away last night after a horrible battle with stage 4 melanoma. She went downhill so fast and now it's all over.

                I don't know how to deal with these emotions and fatigue.

                What makes me tick.... I am a mother to a beautiful 5 year old boy and stepmother to an exhausting 14 year old girl. I am happily married. I have been a nurse for 15 years. I LOVE to cook, seriously, LOVE everything about food. Total foodie. Wine used to go with that.

                I love dreams, and write all of mine down.
                I have worked all my life since a very young age. Parents divorced and alcoholics. Typical bad childhood aside from being molested for several years.
                I have a whole story almost written for the "my story" section but haven't posted it yet.
                My dear brother died 11 months ago in a horrific and graphic car accident. He was drunk. He was my best friend and I have never recovered.
                I'm sarcastic and use humor to deal with stress often times.
                I'm rambling, lol. Being productive and valued makes me Tick I guess.

                Thanks guys. I'm about to pig out now on comfort food!
                Day 1 again 11/5/19
                Goal 1: 7 days :heartbeat:
                Goal 2: 14 days :happy2:
                Goal 3: 21 days :happy2:
                11/27/19: messed up but back on track
                12/14/19: bad doozy but back on track

                One day at a time.

                Comment

                  #9
                  Feeling frustrated

                  Hey Nursie,

                  Hang in there friend.

                  G bloke.

                  'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

                  Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Feeling frustrated

                    Nursie;1500954 wrote: Ahhhh, thanks guys.
                    My stepmother passed away last night after a horrible battle with stage 4 melanoma. She went downhill so fast and now it's all over.
                    I'm sorry to hear about your stepmother. I just lost my father and we laid him to rest on Wednesday. His lymphoma had been in remission since the fall of 2011, but his bone marrow was fried from all the chemo and radiation. Which was fine as long as he was getting blood transfusions, but then he had an adverse reaction to a transfusion. He only lasted about two weeks after that last transfusion, the last week of which he was in hospice unconscious. Like I said above, it was the first time since I've been on meds that I craved alcohol.
                    In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Feeling frustrated

                      I'm so sorry about your Dad Alky. Such a difficult time.
                      Day 1 again 11/5/19
                      Goal 1: 7 days :heartbeat:
                      Goal 2: 14 days :happy2:
                      Goal 3: 21 days :happy2:
                      11/27/19: messed up but back on track
                      12/14/19: bad doozy but back on track

                      One day at a time.

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Feeling frustrated

                        Nursie, I was remiss in not mentioning earlier, after seeing the care my dad received (especially from the hospice nurses), you are all saints. Bless all of you.
                        In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Feeling frustrated

                          Nursie;1500954 wrote: Ahhhh, thanks guys.
                          My stepmother passed away last night after a horrible battle with stage 4 melanoma. She went downhill so fast and now it's all over.

                          I don't know how to deal with these emotions and fatigue.

                          What makes me tick.... I am a mother to a beautiful 5 year old boy and stepmother to an exhausting 14 year old girl. I am happily married. I have been a nurse for 15 years. I LOVE to cook, seriously, LOVE everything about food. Total foodie. Wine used to go with that.

                          I love dreams, and write all of mine down.
                          I have worked all my life since a very young age. Parents divorced and alcoholics. Typical bad childhood aside from being molested for several years.
                          I have a whole story almost written for the "my story" section but haven't posted it yet.
                          My dear brother died 11 months ago in a horrific and graphic car accident. He was drunk. He was my best friend and I have never recovered.
                          I'm sarcastic and use humor to deal with stress often times.
                          I'm rambling, lol. Being productive and valued makes me Tick I guess.

                          Thanks guys. I'm about to pig out now on comfort food!
                          This is reason enough Nursie.

                          Nurses commonly suffer alcohol abuse, all that death you have to deal with.

                          Comfort food, cry ...... You WILL get through this :l

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Feeling frustrated

                            kuya;1500982 wrote: This is reason enough Nursie.

                            Nurses commonly suffer alcohol abuse, all that death you have to deal with.

                            Comfort food, cry ...... You WILL get through this :l
                            You will learn how to deal with it, scary at first but it's a lot better than how you'd feel if you used alcohol to get through it. Life is tough and loads of professionals suffer with alcoholism although you'd only every think it was unemployed layabouts if you let the media influence you.
                            I used the Sinclair Method to beat my alcoholic drinking.

                            Drank within safe limits for almost 2 years

                            AF date 22/07/13

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Feeling frustrated

                              I just posted on another thread about how I am very cranky because I can't seem to get rid of AL thoughts swimming in my brain.
                              These posts have helped me so much! You all make me realize that I am not alone, that these feelings are NORMAL for alcoholics such as myself.
                              It has been so bad, that I am now smoking alcoholically....and I am disgusted about it!
                              Actually, I feel very disappointed in myself for not being stronger about it.
                              So, here I am feeling frustrated.
                              Thanks for letting me dump that here.
                              I just won't anymore

                              Comment

                              Previous 1 2 template Next
                              Working...
                              X