The Folly of MS

[Mein Sonnenschein]

The Folly of MS

Hello All. Lately I've been curious about addiction. What drives addiction and are only certain people per-determined to struggle with this? I'm usually around plenty of people that can moderate or abstain from AL with no issues, so what makes me different in thinking that I NEED to take that drink? I just ordered a book off Amazon titled "In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction" by Gabor Mate M.D. Has anyone heard of this book, or recommend any other reading sources? Or does anyone have an opinion on addiction? Being and IT geek I of course am curious to figure out the root cause of my problems.

Much love and strength to you all.

[jenniech]

The Folly of MS

Hi MS!! It has been awhile since I have seen your posts!! To be honest, I have a hard time keeping up with everyone these days because I am CRAZY busy at work. So busy, that I woke up at 4am today (again) unable to fall back asleep because my mind just starts racing.....very bad, I know...anyway, I digress.....

I gave up trying to figure out why I have addictions while others do not. I think genetics has a lot to do with it. That combined with environment and your own unique personality create what I think of as a perfect storm enabling addiction to manifest itself. I don't think there is one root cause. I think addiction is caused by multiple factors weaving their way into your life over time. That and the substance itself becomes physically addictive.

I think that for people like us, the trick is to find an addiction that is HEALTHY and good for us, like exercising. Not all addictions are created equal!

(i have slowly but surely become addicted to the adrenalin rush I get from exercising!!)

[NoSugar]

The Folly of MS

Welcome back, MS

There has been a conversation (with links) about the biological basis of addiction in this thread:https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...own-77115.html. The book you ordered is very interesting and concerns psychological aspects, childhood experiences, etc. He has several lectures on YouTube and other media sources, also.

NS

[free at last]

The Folly of MS

Dear MS,
I've been out of internet connection for over a week and just now catching up on threads. Glad to see you back and posting. Hang in there--you know you want the freedom that comes from AF life.

[Mein Sonnenschein]

The Folly of MS

It's so great to hear from you all. I hate to ask for this, but please send me some strength today. I'm struggling with something awful and I need support. I have no friends or family around me so I feel totally alone. More than anything I want to run away home but that will not solve anything.

[jenniech]

The Folly of MS

Done. Strength coming your way......and you don't have to ask!!!!!

[Live_Love_Learn]

The Folly of MS

Thoughts are with you MS, I hope your day got better xo

[NoSugar]

The Folly of MS

Stay strong, MS! You are a strong woman - many of us would not have had the courage to move to a new country and live in a very different kind of city than we were used to. And you have the guts to tackle this addiction. Use that toughness that you already have and know that your MWO friends are behind you!

:l NS

[Unwasted]

The Folly of MS

MS, thinking of you. We are here if you need to talk! You are stronger than you know!!

xx,
UN :lilheart:

[Mein Sonnenschein]

The Folly of MS

Thank you all. Love you all. It will get better, right?!

[Unwasted]

The Folly of MS

MS, yes it gets better. But, only after lots of AF time (in my humble opinion). Wishing you well.

xx,
UN :lilheart:

[mylife]

The Folly of MS

MS - something I always tell myself is the old saying "This too shall pass..." Sending you peace and strength. Hang in there things will get better! :l

[Mein Sonnenschein]

The Folly of MS

"This too shall pass..." Love it. My father used to say this to me when I was younger.

I need to make this my new Day 1. I've gotta do it. Have to. I feel like I'm killing my spirit with this drinking. I have to learn to live in this world... not the world of my dreams or the world of my past, but in this world. My life isn't so bad. I have a good family in the USA, we own our house and have a vacation home, I have a good job and I make enough money to be comfortable... so what is my problem??? It could be so much worse... so much worse. My book on addiction arrived today so I'm going to start reading it tonight. I just want to understand WHY. I know that I might not get the answer I'm looking for or even an answer at all, but I have to try to understand. I also bought a book on Buddhist Psychology hoping that I can awaken some sort of joy and love inside myself.

I'm very sorry for starting again... and again. I've received so much support from all of you and I want you to know that I appreciate it all and I have listened to everything you all have said, I just have to be strong and figure it out.

[NoSugar]

The Folly of MS

Hi, MS

Please don't worry about disappointing us - we know that this is not easy. Just keep trying. As long as you are alive and trying, there is hope :l.

Do you have a plan for this day 1 that will help you circumvent what derailed you previously?

Don't drift away, MS. If MWO is your primary tool, you need to use it -and that means regular reading and posting.

Love, NS

[Mein Sonnenschein]

The Folly of MS

It's sooo difficult. When I first started on here I really had no idea. And thinking about it all the time makes it so much more difficult. It's kind of like being on a diet; if you think about being on a diet all you think about is eating what you can't have.

I hate the feelings I have the day after a binge. Just horrible self deprecating feelings. I'm sure it's because of the depressing nature of the AL.

Plan for the evening... I have to go to my German lesson for a hour this evening, then a work meeting afterwards. I'm debating on taking my dog for a long hike or going to the driving range at the golf course. Not sure which one yet. Just gotta stay out of the house. That is where the bad feelings come from. Sitting here alone.