My binge drinking story.

[33female]

Hi I have joined this website to get help with my binge drinking, I am drinking more regularly now. I don't drink every day but when I do drink I drink alot and often get through a whole bottle of wine to myself, I also keep my drinking to my self so sometimes have a sneaky drink on my own. I don't feel addicted to alcohol as I can go days or even a week without drinking but I really want help with the binging. I liked the idea of this forum as I feel I need advice and feedback, I don't like to talk to those close to me about it as I am ashamed of myself but also because I hide some of the drinking from them. I don't have any children but I do work full time and when I am at work I feel happy with my my sober self which makes me wonder why I binge in the first place. I would like to give up the bingeing as I am fed up with feel ashamed of myself the next morning. Advice and comments would be great thanks.

[NoSugar]

My binge drinking story.

Good morning and :welcome: !

There are people here with the pattern you describe - in fact, there seem to be drinkers of every stripe !

A good place to be at the beginning is the Newbies Nest ( link below ). There are people at all stages of this battle there to give you support.

There also is a link to the Toolbox where you can find assorted ideas for getting this done.

I also was sneaky about drinking - living an honest life now is one of the greatest gifts of getting sober.

I'm glad you found MWO -hope to see you posting in the Nest!

:h NS

[JackDanielsGirl]

My binge drinking story.

Welcome

33female,

first of all welcome:welcome: you have found a great place with people of all sorts, bingers, all day and night drinkers, moderators, etc. I too hid not some but all of my drinking. It turned me into a lying, stealing, manipulating mess.

With the determination and help found on this site I have been sober for 19 days today, after years of drinking all day, and 6 months in rehab, to which I came home and immediately relapsed.

When the urge to drink hits, get on here and read and post, then read and post, and finally read and post some more til the urge is gone. There is always someone on here so post your intentions to drink and then read until someone answers and gives you many reasons why not to. Sounds crazy to some, but it has helped me get through tough times without a drink.

Look forward to seeing you in the nest.
JDG:l

[Cinders]

My binge drinking story.

33female,

:welcome:

If anyone could answer the "why" questions, they would be very rich, indeed.

Binge drinking is as difficult to deal with as the every day drinker. Both lead down destructive paths.

Do you have a plan in place? Are you planning to go completely alcohol free, AF, or are you going to try to moderate?

Most find moderation too difficult to achieve but it is your choice.

Cindi

[Unwasted]

My binge drinking story.

Welcome 33,

I went from daily drinking to binge drinking, and it was awful. I posted on Chook's page, which is somewhat similar to your situation. I think any time alcohol causes problems for us and we can't control our intake we're in trouble. And, it's a progressive situation that usually won't get better. If you read around these boards you will see the same story over and over.

If you're not ready to stop drinking you might want to try posting on the Moderation thread. I haven't checked it out lately but there could be some people having success? If you can't do it, I would suggest posting in the Newbies' Nest and at least trying some sober stints to see how it makes you feel.

I drank "normally" for my entire adult life (although now I question the whole premise of drinking because it's truly a poison -- we're just conditioned to think it's ok because everyone does it). Then, my drinking escalated and began causing problems in the way of sleep deprivation and terrible hangovers. I didn't end up on the park bench, but I sure was suffering from the effects of drinking.

After 7 months of being sober and loving it I decided I didn't have a problem, began drinking again and found I was binging. It brought me back here. I've been in both places and think being sober is light years better even than controlled drinking.

We all have to find our own way, and I hope yours is easier than the struggle I've had - always on the roller coaster of drinking, feeling horrible the next day, swearing off, only to start again -- a terrible way to live.

As I mentioned to Chook, once you get a good amount of sobriety you can start to imagine a better life that's even better than being able to moderate. You can't see that now, and it may take you some time to get there.............at least that was my experience and the experience of most people here who have "made it to the other side."

Anyway, 33, I've rambled but hope some of this makes sense to you. This is a tough journey but any time you can get some sober time it helps you sort it all out. We want to really hang on to the ability to drink because our society revolves around it and we've been brainwashed to think it's normal. Really, though, it's not..........it's just been around forever and like cigarettes it's here to stay but that doesn't mean it's a good thing.

No one will judge you here if you try to moderate because we understand it's often part of the process. I would just suggest posting on the Mods threads for a while if you want to try that, and then trying to get some chunks of alcohol free time, and going from there.

Best of luck - lots of great people here to help you - be sure to check out the Newbie's Nest and the Tool Box. Read, read, read..........and post. It's a process, to be sure.

Oh, and I'd like to address your statement about not understanding why you would ever go back to binging when you like your sober time as much as you do. I've been reading books about how our brains are wired and why this phenomenon exists. An oversimplification is to say that the part of your brain that makes you want to drink is the same primitive part that makes you want to eat - we're hardwired to crave in order to survive. If we didn't crave (think food) we'd starve to death and die out as a species. The higher level thinking part of your brain that's smart and doesn't want to you destroy yourself is in a different location. That's why we have these diametrically opposed feelings. Our pleasure pathways have been "hijacked" by drinking. Our brains want us to be able to feel pleasure but when we've created pathways with alcohol the things we're supposed to do to feel pleasure don't work for us anymore, and our brain tells us the only thing that will bring this pleasure is alcohol (or whatever drug we've worn that pathway with)......... We have to rewire our brains so to speak.

OK, now I've really written a novel - sorry to have babbled so much - hope some of it helps!

:l UN