You seem nice.

[Smith]

Hello everyone,

I want to say that the support I've seen on this site is very uplifting.

I've been feeling for a few years that my drinking has become unhealthy. My goal right now is to not drink this week. I hope it is alright to say that my ultimate goal is to get a handle on this and be able to have an occasional drink when out to dinner or with friends.

My anxiety and desire to feel calm generally leads me to drinking a few too many at night and feeling like I need to hide it from my wonderful partner because of the shame I feel. I'd really love to be in control of my anxiety and I hope the step of joining this community will help me to achieve that goal.

I've been reading the "tools" and "just starting out" threads and finally decided to throw my hat in.

[K9Lover]

You seem nice.

Welcome Smith!

We are here to help. I doubt you've done/said/experienced anything that someone here hasn't as well...so please express yourself freely!

You should concentrate on getting some serious sober time in before even contemplating moderate drinking. That's a path that few can go down (successfully). Focus on the here and now and see how you feel.

Keep posting! We look forward to getting to know you!

K9

[Smith]

You seem nice.

Thanks K9. I feel like a bit of a fraud just posting here since I know everyone here has had more difficulty with alcohol than I have, but I do feel like I've been trying to self medicate my anxiety by drinking and I know I need to stop that behavior before it becomes worse.

I'm very happy with my life right now so I'm doing my best to be healthy and mindful of the way I'm treating myself and since I'm not happy with this one aspect of my life I want to take control of it and change it.

[kuya]

You seem nice.

It is good to see someone here BEFORE it got out of control.

You mention anxiety. That may be the root of your drinking or CAUSED by your drinking. You will only know when you stop for a period.

Whether you abstain or moderate life will get better.

:welcome: jump on in and read loads and post A LOT.....it really helps to put your thoughts and feelings into words.....brain retraining

[treetops]

You seem nice.

we all seemed to think we were in your boat "everyone here has had more difficulty with alcohol than I have" - thats what I thought when i went to AA a few times
but if thats the case why are we on MWO?
Degree of difficulty is not the point - and comparison with others can lead to self-justification and complacency
you are doing the right thing by recognising your problem.
Get some sober time and look carefully at your drinking.

Good luck and we are here to help

[Smith]

You seem nice.

Thank Kuya. I've had anxiety problems since I was young, I went through some things that are still difficult for me to talk about.

When I first discovered drinking I took it too far and was blacking out more than I care to admit. I decided to stop drinking hard alcohol and just drink beer or wine which seemed to work for me. Now it's been a few years of that and I'm in a much better place in my life and I feel less anxiety but it does still prevent me from living life the way I want to at times. Now I think my issue is I have a pattern of drinking every night and some nights when I feel anxious I do drink too much and feel ashamed the next day so I'd really like to get that under control.

[Tess-2]

You seem nice.

Smith;1511903 wrote: Thanks K9. I feel like a bit of a fraud just posting here since I know everyone here has had more difficulty with alcohol than I have, but I do feel like I've been trying to self medicate my anxiety by drinking and I know I need to stop that behavior before it becomes worse.

I'm very happy with my life right now so I'm doing my best to be healthy and mindful of the way I'm treating myself and since I'm not happy with this one aspect of my life I want to take control of it and change it.

Dear Smith,

You are not a fraud. My hunch is that you are a bit sensitive. So am I. I see you as someone who recognizes that they have a problem with alcohol before it destroys their life. Good for you!! Many of us wait far too long to seek help.

Feel free to join us in Newbies Nest. That's where I found a lot of information and support when I first discovered the MWO website. Everyone in The Nest is at a different stage in the process of living a life free from the compulsion to drink alcohol.

You CAN take control of your drinking and change the one aspect of your life that you are not happy with. Let us know how we can help.

Welcome!! :hithere:

[Smith]

You seem nice.

Thanks treetops, you are correct, I need to be better about comparing myself to others, good insight.

Tess-2, yep you are also right about me, I am a sensitive person, glad to know I'm not alone. I think I do feel like a fraud in a lot of ways because I feel like I can't share my whole self with people out of fear of judgement or fear of losing them. Thanks for offering to help, it's amazing to get this kind of feedback so quickly.

[Tess-2]

You seem nice.

Smith;1511968 wrote: ... I think I do feel like a fraud in a lot of ways because I feel like I can't share my whole self with people out of fear of judgement or fear of losing them...

Well, Smith, I'm certainly not an expert in "normal" human behavior, but what you feel and experience seems like good-old-common-sense to me. Most of us are only willing to share our WHOLE selves with people deserving of our trust. Goodnight!!.. We're not going to put it all on the line unless we have a solid reason to believe that our most tender self is going to be handled with love and care.

Baby steps, Smith, baby steps. I believe that you will find tenderness in The Nest. Yes, once in a while Nesters are misunderstood or else receive a well-deserved kick in the pants. Bust mostly, people sincerely care and want to help. We ALL know the pain of drinking alcohol when we would really rather not drink. We "get" the shame and embarrassment and, Oh - I don't know, just the wish that things could be different.

So feel free to hang out with us for a bit. ~

p.s. You are not a fraud. :byebye: