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    New to MWO and to Chat Rooms

    :new: This is my first post. I'm new to MWO and have been in a chat room before. I'm in my mid-50's. Have dealt with alcohol problems on and off since my teen years. I've ranged from heavy usage to years of abstinence to years of true social drinking with no craving, then back to heavy usage (after life events), then to years of abstinence and for the past 3 years it's been on and off drinking, often controlled and limited, but sometimes totally out of control. Have been drinking too much the past few months. Often drink 1-3 beers a night and occasionally 5 drinks if out. I've put on about 7 extra lbs over the winter. I've vowed many mornings that I was going to quit and get healthy, but by day's end I go and pick up a 6-pack and start all over. Drank 5 drinks last night by myself (often drink by myself). Feel crappy this morning and mad at myself for my lack of control. Also feel a lot of anxiety, shame and self-loathing. I have spent years in AA in the past, but just am not willing to go back. I can't connect to the program; there are many things about it that really don't work for me. So I'm hoping MWO will truly be that... My Way Out. I've ordered the book. Not sure if I should order the CDs (they're expensive) and which supplements. Talked to my doctor's NP (doc not avail) about medications. The doc called in naltrexone (even though I had Topamax) on the list of choices. Haven't started taking it yet. Has anyone else used naltrexone. Feel very anxious and not sure where to start with the MWO program. Hope I get to connect to others in this chat room.

    #2
    New to MWO and to Chat Rooms

    P.S. I meant to write that I've NEVER been part of a chat room before, so this is new as well.

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      #3
      New to MWO and to Chat Rooms

      hi freedom,welcome to mwo its a great place to be,lots of support here read around theres tons of info on meds over in the meds thread check it out and again welcome
      I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

      I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
      Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

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        #4
        New to MWO and to Chat Rooms

        Me too

        :welcome: Hi! I am pretty much going through the same thing. Though I didn't start heavily drinking until the last 10 years. And I am the same age-mid 50's. My life is pretty much out of control. I drink 6-8 glasses a night, usually wine, with vodka mixed in. I just can't seem to stop. I don't get that "great feeling" any more, so I keep drinking, hoping to, and then I pass out, and have terrible blackouts where I don't remember who I talked to or what I said. I was going to a psychiatrist, and she won't treat me anymore unless I am willing to get "alcohol abuse tested", some psychology thing I have already done and know the answers. I was on naltrexone(sp?) and all that did was not get you that "good feeling" which I didn't know, so it didn't help me at all. But I am sure who could be very helpful for some people. I have not done AA, but have no interest. Don't mean to sound so down, am having major depression this morning, and panic attacks.
        I am just coming back to the site after being gone, and saw your post, and thought maybe we could help each other- would love to connect too.

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          #5
          New to MWO and to Chat Rooms

          Hi! all welcome freedom
          We all are going through the same thing I can relate to newdaynow thou I haven't done the abuse test (never heard of it )
          I also blackout and had no idea what I said or did the night before I was worse if over tied or upset over some thing or some one
          okay

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            #6
            New to MWO and to Chat Rooms

            What to do now?

            Had 2 major panic attacks yesterday. After the first one, thought I was done, then had another one in the evening. I start talking about all of the stuff that is building up inside of me, and then I start to panic. I can't get it all out....can't stop thinking about my out of control life, and wish there was someone I could talk to and get it all out without sounding like a whiney, spoiled brat.
            My husband just can't understand, and he is overwhelmed himself with work.
            This helps a little to at least write about it. Maybe I should try journaling, but afraid someone would read it.
            Anyway, if anyone wants to connect- let me know.

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