Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

[BNRS]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

Hey Lost

its now 2 weeks for you ! Congrats . I really enjoyed reading some of the other things you have been doing. Smiling alone really works at changing your mood. Regarding your anxiety I would not give it much thought. One day at a time, I was at an engagement where there was a lot of AL and I remember feeling awkward as well, but I stepped back and looked at the bigger picture and remembered what I had chosen for myself to be AF and was more comfortable at the end. Remember we are readjusting our lives and there will be times it seems strange . But to me the bigger goal is what we keep our eyes on, everything else is a minor distraction.

[witts end]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

hi lost soul the days are starting to add up for you
what are you up to now

[LostSoul33]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

DAY 13!

Hi everyone!

Just wanted to check in and post before the day is over.

Today is day 13- yippeeee! I dont think Ive been sober for this many days in my adult life. Sad but true. I have a lot more to add to this thread but have to hit the hay....it been a nutty day, in a good way of course

Hope you are all enjoying your AF weekend.

PS - no matter how hectic your schedule gets, in the beginning stages, it is CRUCIAL to SHOW UP here everyday, at least once. I think that MWO has been the underlying reason I will not derail. Cant let myself or any of you wonderful, insightful, brilliant, beautiful people down either.

We are all in this together. I truly feel the love.

:h:h:h:h:h

[decided]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

Congrats in lucky number 13!! Your positivity is infectious so thank you looking forward to your continued success :x

[LostSoul33]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

NoSugar;1525742 wrote: Hi, LostSoul

I saw your posts in the Newbies Nest - way to go!! You are really offering the support people need to hear and when you type it for others, it DOUBLES the message to yourself. What a transformation you've undergone in a short time!

Maybe this contributes to feeling a little awkward around people. You've hardly had time to get used to the New You. Plus, you are putting yourself out there in the world much more quickly than some people even consider, including me. I was barely functioning socially when I was where you are -- still too cold and tired. Really, I was in bed with MWO by 8 pm most nights.

If I were you, I'd give myself some time before worrying about social anxiety. Once you're fully comfortable with yourself, you'll probably be just fine. You're AWESOME here so there is no reason to think the real-life you is otherwise.

:l NS

Hi NS,
Youre so sweet! I think youre pretty awesome yourself
Thanks for bringing up these important points. I have taken every bit of advice from you since day 1 and you have been right every time! Yesterday was a lot easier... I didnt take myself so seriously. Sitting back a bit made such a difference. Will continue to work on myself before attempting to figure out my sober, public persona....one day at a time
Thanks again for everything.
:h:h

[LostSoul33]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

Day 14

Everyone who has offered support, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much!
Today is day 14-- made it through a weekend of AL events AF!
Its so great to have energy and feel emotion...good or bad, I feel human again.
I can now honestly say, every negative point in my life has been attributed to alcohol. Thats enough to stay away from that poison once and for all.
Hope everyone is having a great Sunday :h

[RitaNow]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

LostSoul33;1526004 wrote: Hi everyone!

Just wanted to check in and post before the day is over.

Today is day 13- yippeeee! I dont think Ive been sober for this many days in my adult life. Sad but true. I have a lot more to add to this thread but have to hit the hay....it been a nutty day, in a good way of course

Hope you are all enjoying your AF weekend.

PS - no matter how hectic your schedule gets, in the beginning stages, it is CRUCIAL to SHOW UP here everyday, at least once. I think that MWO has been the underlying reason I will not derail. Cant let myself or any of you wonderful, insightful, brilliant, beautiful people down either.

We are all in this together. I truly feel the love.

:h:h:h:h:h

Waaaaaay to Gooooooooo LS!!! You made it through another social setting! I am on day 17 and have only put myself in a "drinking" setting ONCE so far. I've been kind of hiding out at home! Hehe. I think it's strength building to get some "practice". After all - that REALLY is what forming new habits is all about ... gaining muscles in those areas!!

I love your list of "aids". I also am doing many of those things and I seriously think that they are making all the difference in the world in gaining momentum in the AF life.

I can relate to "social anxiety" creeping back in. I believe all of us who become addicted to AL are at risk for this - and probably had social anxieties whether or not we realized it before we started abusing AL. I have a suspicion that we built our social life on AL because it muffled those social fears - to the point that just the simple act of being CLEAR when with a group can be intimidating! I've been thinking about this a lot this week - because I have some social events coming up that I need to HAVE A MENTAL PLAN. Here are my thoughts on that:

1. If I am making all of the other HEALTH changes at the same time I've quit drinking - that will help me to build self confidence that I can continue to remind myself of when in social environments. It has be be a dialogue in my HEAD while I'm at these events or I will find my ever people pleasing personality "melding" into what I think would make THEM happy .... which causes me a TON of anxiety. Trying to second guess how to make others smile is a burden. DON'T GO THERE! I can only be responsible for what is going on in my head .... not others!!!

2. I'm going to go into the social event like I am on "assignment". A "REPORTER" so to speak. And my job is to observe, stay sharply tuned in, and be able to report back everything that happened at the party. I've read it helps you not to over talk, or under talk or feel anxious, because your busy "observing". Hummm .... I'll report back if this works.

3. Go to the event FULL. Eat a meal ahead of time, even if your going to be eating. This settles most peoples anxieties down and puts you in a bit of a "sluggish" state - which can be a good thing when you are testing your will power to not drink.

4. Look at peoples lips (mouth) when they are talking. It forces you to become a better listener, and takes a little anxiety away from looking them directly in the eye. You can glace up that the eyes - but they will never know you are looking at their mouth. Try it.

5. Lastly - this isn't about anxiety but just going to a party .... Drink a beverage that you normally don't .... say tomato juice, or club soda or regular coke. That way you feel you partook in festivities, rather than the routine of sipping your normal beverage.


LS - I really find your thread helpful. Keep up the journey! I'm right here with you!

[LostSoul33]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

RitaNow, GREAT tips! I love them all! Being on "assignment" and observing is brilliant. I never thought of #3 but will definitely exercise the habit, makes perfect sense.Thanks for the support and your words of encouragement, it means a lot :heart:
Learning to live a sober life and facing issues, although challenging, is empowering to say the least.
Thanks so much

[LostSoul33]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

Hi all,
On Day 15. Feeling tired, emotionally spent and nursing a headache. I am learning that no day is the same in recovery or hour for that matter; however, I am embracing each thought and emotion because they are real-- quite a novelty for me to endure raw feelings without an escape. Will check back in later today.
Hope everyone has a great Monday :heart:

[NoSugar]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

LostSoul and RitaNow -

You guys are the Dynamic Duo! What good ideas you have - and doing this together is so powerful. It helps keep you on the path when you don't want to be separated from or let down your friend.

I'm so happy for both of you! Keep on doing what you're doing!

:h NS

[witts end]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

good for you lost soul wow day 15 thats great

[LostSoul33]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

witts end;1526965 wrote: good for you lost soul wow day 15 thats great

Congrats to you as well! :h

[LostSoul33]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

Today is day 16! Made it through my first long weekend AF. Yay!
I went to a few AL events on Sat & Sun and decided I didnt have the willpower to continue yesterday so I stayed home. What a great decision. I woke up in a good mood, feeling refreshed with a lot of energy. Went to the farmers market, did yoga, tried a sauna, went for a walk, ate fresh veggies and fish, stocked up on coconut water and fruit for the evening and now Im reading a new book, taking breaks, of course, to check into MWO. How are some of you feeling today? Would love to hear :heart:

[RitaNow]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

Sounds like an AWESOME day LS!!! Isn't it great finishing a day with a book in hand. Something that CAN'T be done when you've been drinking! I love it. Smart of you to skip the continued parties. It's one thing to test your strength ... quite another to tempt fate. Ease into the social scene where drinking is the entertainment. I honestly believe many people in those settings are envious when they see someone NOT drinking. So many people KNOW they need to stop ... for good. Eventually it catches up with everyone. It just depends on what degree of abuse. IMHO

I had a great day today too .... I know July will fly by .. Summer always goes by to fast - so I am trying not to wish the days away (even though I will be happy to reach that 30 day AF mark). Trying to smell the roses --- one day at a time. Summer is my favorite season. I like my AF birth date. I want to keep it forever!!! :h

[3June2013]

Day 2 - Pls help me be accountable - New thread

Lost Soul I think you're going to need a new handle soon because you sound very much in tune with yourself these days! Self -reflection is so important in life and it's especially helpful when we can do it without judgement and in kindness. You are well on your way, and you've found new friends to share your thoughts and revelations with. That's what MWO is all about for me! Soldier on, the weeks will turn into months before we know it!