Well last night I was at the bottom of my second bottle and after bringing the steaks in from the bbq my kind, loving, tolerant gentle wife of nearly 40 years had the nerve to complain that her steak was a bit too rare for her liking. I lost it and erupted into a tyrate of abuse that was really scary, even to me. There were alot of other things (not concerning her) that probably led up to it, but she became the focus of all of my frustation. (not physical but very loud and verbal) Totally out of line.
In all the years i've been drinking, I have never woken up with such a sense of shame and self loathing. It was so out of character for me that it really scared me. I love this woman with all of my heart and tell her every day.
I've seen a lot of chat on here about hitting a bottom that will make the quit stick. Hopefully this is the one for me. I don't think I've ever been this shaken by something I've done. It's day one. Wish me luck.
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