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    #1

    new, in need of support

    hi all, not sure if this is where i should post this, but today i've decided i need to withdraw from alcohol as this is just too much on my body. i haven't gone a day without vodka, from morning till night in a yr and a half. my tolerance is so high i go through 2 of the huge bottles each week and that's me pacing myself. i don't even attempt to mix it b/c that would do nothing at this point.

    now, i'd already wanted to stop if possible since on friday, i received a prescription for lexapro due to depression, and i really wanted to try and not drink while on it. tomorrow i'll receive a prescription for ativan due to panic attacks. so yesterday, i took my "last" drink in the afternoon, thinking i would begin my rx this morning. no such luck.

    i woke up this morning shaking uncontrollably throughout my body. only laying still would stop it. even my tongue trembled if i tried to hold liquids in. i've never had this happen so after extensive googling saw i was having withdrawal. i can't do this. i need to be able to take this medication to begin functioning in life again. so that's what led me to this site, i looked up methods to taper, since it is not an option for me to do it any other way, and since this morning i've just been having 1 sip on the hr (it's not an option to use beer). it's only helped somewhat as i'm still shaking right now, but i'm afraid to drink anymore than that. i have no appetite, but managed to eat 2 eggs in order to take a multivitamin.

    i know this was long but i have no other outlet. any support/advice would be great, or if anyone can just relate. i have no idea how i'll make it through the night if i know i'll be waking up to the same experience as this morning : (
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    #2
    new, in need of support

    Hi there - did you talk to your doctor? Did he prescribe your meds knowing about your drinking? With the amount that you consume, you need to be very careful about withdrawals. YOu need to see a doctor and fess up about the drinking and let him/her help you. Withdrawals, if severe enough, cannot be handled alone safely. My oldest sister coded TWICE in the way to the hospital years ago as she tried doing it alone. She drank vodka too. Please get help. We are not doctors and can only speak from experience, but you need a doctor, and quickly. Please seek help.
    February 27th, 2013. A New , Successful Start. :h

    When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top!!

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      #3
      new, in need of support

      no, i did not mention the drinking. i'm really sorry to hear what happened to your sis and hope she's doing better after such an experience. i know you guys aren't docs on here, and i appreciate the advice to see one, but it's just not an option for me in this moment. i have insurance and financial issues. plus this would wreak even more havoc in my family life to say the least. i'm just trying to go about things the best way i can in this moment

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        #4
        new, in need of support

        Wagoneer speaks the truth. Unlike withdrawals from other drugs such as heroin, speed, or whatever, alcohol withdrawal is the ONLY one that can be life threatening. You can actually die. Really. You say it will 'wreak havoc' but I'm sure your family aren't going to be too chuffed if they have to go to the morgue to identify your body.

        I understand financial and other issues (although I live in Australia with 'free' medical care) but at the end of the day, my life is worth more than any other shit. If nothing else, can you roll up to A and E whilst you have the shakes and demand to see a doc? They will at least provide you with some heavy-duty diazepam or something to alleviate the worst of the symptoms.

        Let me reiterate: alcohol withdrawal is not to be fucked around with. Go get some help.

        kambob
        Remember: A craving will never last as long as a hangover, and you'll never wake up wishing you'd drank the night before. (Thank you K9Lover)

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          #5
          new, in need of support

          thank you for your advice. i think i'll just leave this thread here and consider what i'll do. no more replies are necessary. thanks again.

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            #6
            new, in need of support

            Hello Ash. I know what your experiencing. I was drinking almost the whole biggest bottle of whiskey a day. I quit 8 days ago. I still have a shaky feeling. im 41 years old. Been thru many relapses. The best treatment I received was at a detox center. This time im doing it at home. Torture these withdrawls are. Alcohol withdrawls is nothing to mess with. Hopefully you will be a bit better with the benzo they are prescribing you. My doctor always tells me to check myself in if I ask for a benzo.

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              #7
              new, in need of support

              Geez, I'm sorry ash, I really didn't mean to scare you away.

              If you hang around a bit more and read some of the threads you might get some tips and advice for how to cope with detoxing without meds. It can be a bit of a chore though, because this site is one of the messiest I've ever come across! :H

              Wading through all the fora and the individual threads takes a heap of commitment and time....perhaps you could devote a day (or a week!) to doing that? I know when I'm on here it reinforces my resolve to stay AF, if for no other reason than I don't want to end up doing Day 1 and detoxing all over again.

              Whatever you decide, good luck with your journey. Keep reading, keep posting, and mostly keep yourself SAFE, okay?

              kambob
              Remember: A craving will never last as long as a hangover, and you'll never wake up wishing you'd drank the night before. (Thank you K9Lover)

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                #8
                new, in need of support

                will do; thank u

                Comment

                  #9
                  new, in need of support

                  Ash the important thing is to not give up. Whichever road you decide to take. Drinks lots of water. Flush out your system as best you can. I feel for you. :l
                  No matter how far you go or how fast you run, you can't get away from yourself. ....said at an AA meeting. It stuck with me.

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                    #10
                    new, in need of support

                    I'm sorry Ash - you sounded very desperate and we don't want anything to happen to you. Please stay on the site and let us know how you are. Sending healing thoughts your way.

                    Waggy
                    February 27th, 2013. A New , Successful Start. :h

                    When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top!!

                    Comment

                      #11
                      new, in need of support

                      just an update, today is day 3 of tapering using vodka. the first day i allowed a measured sip each hr, then 2nd day moved to every two hrs since it was around then i noticed the shaking return, and the instructions i read said to only use it to keep them at bay. the worst out of the world, full body tremors were that first day, yesterday i only had my hands tremble for them most part. until last night i ate something and decided to wait an additional half hr after eating before taking a sip, and my body didn't like for some reason. maybe b/c i threw the schedule off? so i took the sip, but for the rest of the night i kept having muscle tremors in my legs, not full body this time. i took an additional sip 2 hrs later to see if they would go away, and they subsided but it was still an uncomfortable night, coupled with the sweating, restlessness, headache, and anxiety.

                      i've been taking calcium, magnesium, a pill maketed as liver antioxidants, multi vitamin, b vitamin complex, several times a day and i threw in CoQ10 since it was on hand for good measure. drinking lots of water w/lemon and eating mainly proteins and vegetables.

                      my main concern right now is my heart rate, i use one of those digital bp machines that also gives u your rate, and mine is entirely too high. i'm watching it closely b/c the rate tends to go down a little when i have the sip, but then the bp increases. then when it's time for the next round of alcohol, hr is sky high again.
                      i think several things could be contributing to that, first, the tapering naturally causes anxiety from what i've read around here, but i also read that could be a sign i'm tapering too quickly, which might well be true. the other factor is, i naturally experience panic/anxiety anyway, which is what the ativan rx is for, which i did pick up.

                      so, i think i'm going to slow down the taper, b/c i went from every 1hr to 2 hrs, and really i wanted to push it to 3 hrs or try to not drink until i saw symptoms today. but i might need to keep on yesterday's schedule and watch my heart rate for today. if i try to take it slow for a few days and don't see my vitals getting better, i'll have to stop and use the ativan.

                      Comment

                        #12
                        new, in need of support

                        Hi ash,
                        Congratulations on making it to day 3! BUT, PLEASE be careful. Do you have someone with you? What happens if you begin to have hallucinations, convulsions, seizures? You're in dangerous territory right now. If you'r not going to do this under a doctor's care, AT LEAST have someone with you all the time for the next few days.

                        I don't mean to nag or sound harsh, but you're very vulnerable right now.

                        Comment

                          #13
                          new, in need of support

                          glad your still trying
                          I don't know anything about the drugs they suggest
                          nor do I know anything about the tapering
                          I did have the shakes and my doctor put me on an anti depression and I also did a liver detox
                          and they went after a couple of weeks when the anti depression tablets took hold .....I was aloud to take 2 @ day if they were to bad ... but check with doctor .........also if I'm over anxious I take st johns wart in liquid form as it gets into your system quicker
                          just keep hanging in here
                          the first 2 weeks are the worse

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                            #14
                            new, in need of support

                            Hey ash, please post as often as you can so we know you're ok. I'm not going to pretend to know what you're going through but like the others have said, you are in a dangerous place right now. Be careful and think about who you trust enough to help you by being close by.
                            Newbies Nest
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                            My accountability thread

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                              #15
                              new, in need of support

                              thank you all for the concern! i'm still taking it slow, i've kept at the same level for a few days so as to not taper too quickly and keep my vitals as steady as possible. after a week of being at this now, i plan to begin taking ativan in the next few days to wean myself off even more.
                              best of luck to everyone in their journeys as well.

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