Well, That Didn't Take Long

[Pinecone]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Hi friends, great to see you all here!

Mylife, welcome back! I'm sorry to hear about your family's losses. It's great to see you here and hear your commitment.

NS, I also liked the Thurman quote. Thanks for posting that!

Lifechange, I'm not one of the lucky ones in love with my work. It can be fulfilling at times but very draining. About the "checklist" I've decided that is probably the wrong term. I mean that I take a minute to see where my head is at. Am I being grateful, patient, compassionate and the other qualities I am working on in myself. I guess I try to put myself in perspective (which usually means being a bigger, better person and getting on with my day in the right frame of mind).

The mindfulness practice is helping me stay more grounded in the present and not get carried away into the future or dwell on the past. It has really been helping me.

Have a great AF day everyone!

[NoSugar]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Hi, Friends

Last evening I was thinking about this group and how we're all trying to be the best people we can be -- to be appreciative -- to live in the present -- to control what we can and let the rest go... All good goals. And how nice to have people of similar mind and interest to talk to.

A bit later we narrowly avoided a fairly high-speed traffic accident when a person perpendicular to us ran a red light. During the instant that you see the accident coming and time seems to slow down, the thought I had was that I was so glad that I had been sober for my last 8 months.

Happily, I have the chance for more sober months but it reinforced to me that we really need to live our best possible lives for as long as we have that chance - No more squandering whatever precious time we have.

I'm glad to be here! :h NS

[mylife]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

NoSugar;1567904 wrote: Hi, Friends

Happily, I have the chance for more sober months but it reinforced to me that we really need to live our best possible lives for as long as we have that chance - No more squandering whatever precious time we have.

I'm glad to be here! :h NS

NS - what a great quote. I think the deaths of our parents (I lost my Dad last year and this year my husband lost both his parents) has reminded me of that as well. How do I really want to live the rest of my life?

I'm happy to be AF again - another week under my belt now. I really want to stay this way forever this time. There is no glamour left for me in drinking. My slips in the last month had nothing to do with having a good time. I said to my husband the other day that one thing I'm grateful for is this Alcoholism happened to me at a point in my life where I really don't feel like I"m "missing out" anymore. Who wants to be a middle aged drunk? Not me! I had my 20's and 30's when it wasn't an issue and was able to go out with my friends etc. during those years. Now I'm on to another chapter in my life. And happily, it does not include Alcohol.

Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Sunday. :h

[allswell]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Hi everyone,

Several weeks ago a client of mine had a teenage daughter who died of a heroin overdose. NS and Mylife, your posts touch on exactly what I'm thinking right now. No one ever looks back on their life and remembers all the great drunks they were on, what we have is right now and it's time to make the most of it. Today I am beyond grateful for what I am and what I am not.

Hey Mylife, I would love to hear what you think of Panama. I'm planning on flying down to Panama City next spring for the same reason. I was going to spend several days there, go west and visit Costa Rica and then meet with a friend in Nicaragua who has lived there for years and loves it.

FAL, campaign going well, looking forward to it being over in three weeks. The opponent is not nearly the asshole the last one was. It's kind of refreshing running against someone who's not mentally unstable and finds their entire self worth in a title, the office is about public service after all.

Lifechange, Pinecone, NS and everyone else - I hope today is spent with things that matter. If you visit UN you're missed.

[Pinecone]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Good morning friends,

Wow, NS I'm glad you're still here with us! Events like that can put things in sharp perspective for us after we have time to calm down and contemplate them.

Mylife it sounds like you're at that point of just being tired with drinking. I was there for a while, it is just such a depressing state and such a relief to get away from it. It really holds no joy for us at all, just in twisted memories or euphoric recall as Un introduced the phrase to me.

If I were a writer, I'd feel like writing a haiku about it! But you'll have to settle for: have a great AF day!

[mylife]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

LOL - Pinecone great Haiku.

You are right I am just plain tired of drinking. At this point it's hard to remember what was ever "fun" about it! It really hasn't been fun for a long time, especially since I had to start feeling guilty about drinking it!

So, I'm on a work trip and off to have dinner at a place where they have great "sparkling lemonade" with mint. I love it when I find places that have interesting Non Alcohoic Drinks! I think there's a market out there for it!!

Have a great evening all.

[lifechange]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Hello friends! I have been jumping around reading here all morning. I have a lovely day off and will probably head in for a nap.
It sounds as if everyone is doing well. We are having some beautiful Autumn days-- and are getting ready for an Open House-market at the school this weekend. We have a huge fire pit in the school yard as well as a beautiful clay-wood burning oven where bread and cakes are baked for the festivities. I love this time of the year here-- I know I've said it before.. but it's so beautiful with the changing colours.
We're getting ready for a trip to visit family-- in 7 weeks we'll be heading off. The girls are so looking forward--

Mylife, Panama sounds wonderful!-- Do you by chance speak Spanish? I've been trying to learn for years on my own, and have come to the conclusion that I need a course... first thing next year.

:l:l to all of you, Alls, Pinecone, Nosugar, Free, 3June, Un...

[free at last]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Hi all, quick flyby as I am off for the airport (yeah, it is getting old, believe me). But this time, my travel is domestic. Will try to write a proper update/response to posts later this week.

Re-entry into the USA is taking longer and longer each time I return. I'm tired, tend to avoid computers, and only motivated to go for walks in the woods and eat out at any ethnic restaurant. Am now, finally, back to getting online.

Happy to report 90 AF days for me. Has been the hardest thing I've ever done (except marriage of 30+ years) and still very much plodding along, with temptations every other day. But, happy to be on this journey with you all.

[mylife]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Hello Friends!

Free - CONGRATULATIONS!!! That is a huge achievement! And I agree - this AF thing is up there with sticking out a long term marriage! :H Really, that is SUCH a huge achievement you should be very proud. I can remember when you were struggling to make 30 days!!

Life - I do speak Spanish in a limited way. It's kind of necessary here in Florida. One of my goals is to get really good (fluent) next year. I do hear that Rosetta Stone works if you use it.

Hope everyone is having a great AF day!

[allswell]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Hi everyone,

Congratulations FAL on 90 days! Does it continue to be hard? Hopefully it's become easier as the time passes but I know for me travel is a trigger big time.

Been on pins and needles about this marathon in DC I've spent months training for that might be cancelled because of all the dysfunction in Washington. Weird how the federal government can impact us in ways we never imagined, never thought when I booked the plane, hotel, and paid the race fees politics would have a possibility of nixing what I thought was such an unrelated event and good fundraiser. Unsettling to say the least.

Have a great day everyone.

[NoSugar]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

The news today sounds hopeful for your race, Allswell. I hope it is a go and that you have fun and are pleased with your performance.

MyLife and Lifechange, maybe it is good that the fun is gone from drinking - there is less to give up. I was never much of a celebratory drinker in the first place. I guess it was an escape/numbing agent. I'm going to be at a boozy celebration this weekend and if I were still drinking, I would have only a couple glasses of wine while there. I suppose it would be "nice" if I could do that as it would be less socially awkward but don't worry -- I know full well where that would lead and I'm not going. I'm also coming around to the school of thought that it really is weird that people consume something that is a know hepatotoxin, is associated with e.g. breast cancer risk at fairly low doses, greatly increases the risk of accident and death, etc. etc. If it were a new drug, I'm fairly certain it would not get onto the market. I'm not sure I would drink again even if I could somehow be sure I would not sink back into the abyss. Drinking is inconsistent with everything else about how I live my life; I guess the strength of the addiction enabled me to rationalize what I was doing. We talk about 'normal drinkers' but I'm not really sure there is anything normal about it; it is merely socially acceptable.

Congratulations, Free! You're getting this done under some of the most adverse circumstances I've known about. Keeping your marriage healthy with all of your travel also is very impressive !

Pinecone, our voice of experience in this thread -- I'm so glad you're here! Is it cold enough for you yet? It is starting to get chilly here in the midwest so I'm getting worried...

Hope everyone is doing well, NS

[lifechange]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Dear Free, Very well done on those 90 days! I'm proud of you and looking forward to hear more about how you are when you're back from your travels!

I'm running off to work! Warm hello to everyone. Ughh!! Just heard the rain outside, and it's cold to boot! I desperately need to buy an umbrella or two!!

[Pinecone]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Good evening friends,

I've had some really poor and interrupted sleep this week and it is making me a miserable wreck! Wow, I really got spoiled by all the wondrous AF sleep, when that gets interrupted it is a big blow to the system. But I'm muddling on.

I had some troubling thoughts about drinking. Not a desire to, but a fear that I would. Instead of dismissing it, I think I allowed some fear to creep in and it the more I thought about it, the more unsettled I felt. I think this is a very subtle tactic of my addicted mind to undermine my AF life. I'm really sorry I'm not my usual chipper self. I really debated posting this here, but I want to be very open. I'm not worried about actually drinking, but I didn't handle the thoughts well and I feel a little off center because of it. I should have pulled out the mind weeds as soon as I recognized them, but I think I let the fear get to me. Sorry to dump that on you, but it feels good to let it out. Note to self: always just say "NO HELL NO" to any thought involving drinking, even if it comes from an unexpected angle.

NS, yes the weather is lovely, grey, cool and windy! I'll be in a better mood to enjoy it soon.

FAL, congratulations on your 90 days and hang in there with me! It's ok to have ups and downs.

Alls, good luck with your races, physical and political!

Lifechange your open house sounds lovely.

My life, 3june, Un, and anyone else checking in here, have a great AF night.

[NoSugar]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Hi, Pinecone

If you remember, I went through that fear a while ago and also didn't know where to post about it - now I think that this thread or the 100 day thread are good. I got so worked up, at one point it seemed like I might as well drink and get the trauma over with. It would be nice if those thoughts never came but at least if we stay alert, they won't take us where we don't want to go. I'm glad you checked in and please don't feel required to be cheery. Acting like I was fine even when I wasn't was a big part of my problem!

Take care, NS :h

[allswell]

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Hi everyone,

Hey Pine, I appreciate you letting us know what's going on because it's a thought process we all have. This is a tough mental fight we have from time to time. I think it can be difficult because, in my case, fighting through those drinking thoughts requires the very discipline I never mentally had when I allowed myself to get into this problem in the first place. Habitual drinking never required any discipline, it was really the complete opposite of discipline. Now to fight the temptations requires an exercise of discipline I never had to use before. I appreciate your honesty and openness regarding something we all probably have in common in our heads, I know for sure I do.

Have a great day/evening everyone!