This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

[mnorgard]

Hi all,

Last week was THE week - the week to give it my all and I had a pretty good week - upped my dose of Topamax, started working out with a personal trainer who basically kicked my ass. All was looking good. I was hopeful. But how do you handle these weekends??? I had some things planned but as I've posted before, I live alone, and no matter what I've planned, I still end up at some point, home and alone. Friday night I made it home without stopping anywhere but then went through the maddening cycle of getting up, putting my shoes on, picking up my keys, walking outside, arguing with myself, turning around, going back inside, taking my shoes off, putting down my keys only to start the cycle again. This lasted about 20 minutes until I ended up on the couch, in tears, because this is just too hard. I didn't drink but only barely. Does this get easier?? Does anyone else feel like they're going crazy sometimes? I've always felt that I was a rather sane, stable, mentally-tough individual. But the voice that tries to convince me to drink - that's a LOUD and obnoxious voice. Why can't it just go away? How do you ignore it?? Any thoughts??

Marcia

[gabby]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Marcia, it will get easier. My first weekend was by far the hardest. And that was 10 months ago. Now not that the second weekend is much easier but since you are taking the topamax I assure you that you'll have an easier time of it. Keep working out and drink lots of water. Take the supps and read read read the posts. People here will talk to you and help you out a lot. pm me anytime or anyone for that matter. I still take the topa and swear by it. Just keep on goin and dont look back.

[julie001]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Marcia,

Log on here when that little voice keeps niggling at you to drink. It's the best therapy! Before I started logging on regularly, I was drinking up to five nights a week. Now I drink once or twice a week . My goal is moderation, no more than two glasses of wine at a time. I'm not there yet, but with the help of this program and all of the wonderful people here, I'm getting there. You will too! MYO works. Have faith, follow the program as much as you can, and hang in there. It gets easier. Good luck. Look forward to hearing from you again!

Julie

[morrison]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Hello Marcia

You wrote "you live alone." Did you mean you are/feel alone? Don't you have people you can spend some time with that don't drink? I imagine it is very hard if you are lonely. My best advice is to find time to do other things. I havn't used Topa. I'm on Campral, and that kills the craving for me. So, even when I get bored and or lonely (which I still do regardless of how many hobbies I picked up), I've been able to manage without little effort. Hang in there a bit. If you find the Topa isn't working, maybe you'll have to try something els.e

[stollies1]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Hi Marcia,
You seem to be missing one important point here my dear...YOU DIDNT DRINK!!!!
Good on ya :goodjob:
You should be proud you ignored that pesky little beast.
It is hard at first and I think it gets better some times and at others those same old feelings come washing back over you..you just have to be as strong as you can.
It's a good idea to come on here when your feeling a little wobbly on the wagon.You'll be amazed how quickly someone will come to give you a hand.
Come here when you need a leg up and come here when your doing great.'Cos we're all here for you and each other.
Keep us posted.
Victoria xxooxx

[Determinator]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Marcia you brave soul, to echo Stollies....a big congrads to you! You may already be doing this but you must take your vitamins/supplements very serisously to help regrow the NEW mental patterns that you need. Your brain is starving for GABA which alcohol normally produces. GABA, A powerful B complex, lots of C (often overlooked but SO important), L-Glutamine, Aminos...throw the book at this thing! Kudos also on the exercise. There will be LOTS of ups and downs as you start especially. You will have moments of giddyness where you start to giggle and don't know why, then sadness, but it WILL mellow out. Hang in there!

[goingsobermum]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Marcia,
Ditto the others YOU DIDN'T DRINK. That is a great achievement. It is bloody hard, but it gets easier. Remember that its the big bad alcohol talking to you, trying really hard to get you to stay in its grip. Its NOT a weakness in you, you've shown you are tough by getting through Friday night and you'll get through more and more. Next time will be a week later and on top of that you'll be better prepared. Maybe get out for a walk and get some oxygen into your system or cook yourself your favorite food and watch a good movie. Do you know anyone else who doesn't drink? You could invite them round.
Welldone

[AMELIA]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Well done Marcia,
I've been in that position before (I even went to the off license and bought a bottle of wine, only to return home, cry and then take the bottle back to the store for a refund -very embarassing!) but the great thing is that you didn't drink.
I am on an 8 week relapse management course at the moment and on week 2 we did 'Cravings' which is essentially what you were having. We have been assured that the cravings last between 15 to 20 minutes and that they are completely normal. So it is in that first minute or so when you feel a craving coming on - be it a thought about drinking, or a thirst which takes your thoughts to drinking etc. At those moments you need to find a way of occupying yourself - doing something good for yourself, until the feeling is gone.
It is hard sometimes and easier at others. It also gets easier with time.
Keep up the good work.

Amelia

[Popeye]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Hello Marcia,
I had to smile when I read the bit about standing at the door arguing with yourself.
I do that , though not as often as I used to. Sometimes I give in. It's bloody hard on those occasions not to. All my best intentions fade into the background and fhe promises I've made mean nothing. It's a struggle sometimes that lasts until the last shop has closed and it's impossible for me to buy drink. Sometimes it'll take a while until the riot in my head quietens enough for me to relax, but in the end, I'm always glad if I didn't drink, and always sad if I did.
I'm glad you didn't.

[irishlady]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Hi Marcia,
Congtratulations on your success in not giving in to that voice.. I know how loud and persuasive that voice can be in the beginning and it is hard to ignore...

You must ignore it though, because by giving in you are feeding it and it will get stronger.... Ignore it, and it will slowly starve and fade away, and yes this does really happen.. From time to time it comes back, but by then you will be so strong in your determination not to drink that you will be able to deal with it more easily..

The next time the voice is shouting in your head, don't get into an argument with it, that is like arguing with a child, it just escalates, instead, put a face to that voice, preferably a horrible one, then in your loudest and firmest voice say, NO, I'M NOT DRINKING, NOW GO AWAY.. Once you have said that don't sit there waiting for it to come back, do something to distract yourself, come on here, even if you don't post just read, or you could post about your experience, ask for help, you'll get so involved that you will forget about that voice..


You may have to do this several times, but don't waver, don't think to yourself, well, maybe just one drink, if you do that then the voice will get stronger and stronger....

You will find after a time, provided you are firm that you are the stronger, and as I said, the voice will go away...

I wish you luck,

Louise xx

[betty boop]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Hi Marcia,

Yes it is hard, like the others here, I'm not perfect but Well Done!!! When i'm battling it I always tell myself that I will feel better in the morning if I don't drink. Keep busy, signing on here is always good.

Take care xx

[skootiemom]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Marcia,

All great advice... can't really top it... WELCOME!!!!

Skoots

[norma lynne]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

I am brand new, I can already see that I am going to find lots of comfort in this site. What you said Popeye, hit home with me. Why is it when you are in bed to sleep, your innocense comes back and every things seems so much more clear? Thanks Everyone, hope to be talking with you on a regular basis.

[Popeye]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Hi norma lynne,
Good to have you with us.

[Quiescent]

This is SO hard...how do you ignore the voice?

Lots of great advice here for me too.

I never knew the voice would go away after 15-20 minutes. That is some great information.

I don't have the hypno CD's but I've heard those are good for getting rid of the voice.

I can't invest in them right now but look forward to getting them in the near future.

Good Luck Mnorgard!

Welcome Norma Lynne!