The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

[finallydone]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

treetops;1553276 wrote: Just remembered a relapse in the past. about 6 years ago I had 9 months AF under my belt and started drinking on a long haul flight when I was upgraded to business class. That was really an excuse for me I think. I did not do anything terrible or go on a binge but over the next few years gradually 'upgraded' my tolerance for AL to earlier levels.

during the past 11 months of my sobriety I have also travelled a lot and had many opportunities to drink. But I was on guard and made sure I ate and drank lots of AF things. And kept busy with some fun things. I also kept a supply of Antabuse on hand in case I felt I would be tempted.

I want to hear the stories. Thank you soo much treetops! This is how we get better! Learning from each other.

[Kradle123]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

Hello my sweet FD. :l I am so so glad you are back. I though of you often this Summer, a bit jealous that you were off fishing and sunning on your boat! My Summer boat adventure did not go well...next Summer for sure!

Last time you were with us you were working your ass off as I recall...:nutso: Studying, working, working, studying and I guess there was some keep in there somewhere...
Do you think your schedule contributed to the relapse? Also I remember you had an accident (car?) but I believe you recovered ok, or did you?

When we didn't hear from you as much, I assumed you were just way busy. I think not visiting here at least every day leads us back to our dark places. I know it's beating the horse, FD, but staying away from here is just ...well...a forgone conclusion for people like us.

Love you, FD and so happy you're here. It wasn't the same without you. :h

[C-Developer]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

Welcome back FD, and I commend you on being able to identify the problem and seek ways to solve it. I think what has helped me so far is being able to identify circumstances and emotions that make me drink, and it sounds like that is what you are seeking to identify as well. Once we know this, it is easier to find a way to combat them. My major flaw is loneliness and social anxiety, and once you do some soul searching I am confident you will find your triggers as well.

You are for sure in the right place, there are some great folks here that have helped me immensely

[finallydone]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

Kradle123;1553281 wrote: Hello my sweet FD. :l I am so so glad you are back. I though of you often this Summer, a bit jealous that you were off fishing and sunning on your boat! My Summer boat adventure did not go well...next Summer for sure!

Last time you were with us you were working your ass off as I recall...:nutso: Studying, working, working, studying and I guess there was some keep in there somewhere...
Do you think your schedule contributed to the relapse? Also I remember you had an accident (car?) but I believe you recovered ok, or did you?

When we didn't hear from you as much, I assumed you were just way busy. I think not visiting here at least every day leads us back to our dark places. I know it's beating the horse, FD, but staying away from here is just ...well...a forgone conclusion for people like us.

Love you, FD and so happy you're here. It wasn't the same without you. :h

Kradle my dear friend! Yes after I recovered I got a little cocky again and everything was going great. And than I was overwhelmed by life this past month. I made the cardinal sin of a alcoholic and not reaching out for help when I needed it the most. But this is a time to learn and I realize more than ever where I need to be to stay sober. Love you too!

[finallydone]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

C-Developer;1553283 wrote: Welcome back FD, and I commend you on being able to identify the problem and seek ways to solve it. I think what has helped me so far is being able to identify circumstances and emotions that make me drink, and it sounds like that is what you are seeking to identify as well. Once we know this, it is easier to find a way to combat them. My major flaw is loneliness and social anxiety, and once you do some soul searching I am confident you will find your triggers as well.

You are for sure in the right place, there are some great folks here that have helped me immensely

Hi C-Developer! Great to meet you. Sobriety is tough work. Talking about where and how we get triggered is how we stay sober. Nice to meet you.

[Lavande]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

Hi there FD,

Sorry about your relapse but glad to see you came right back!
Finding our triggers & planning ahead how to handle them without AL is big!!!!

When I first started here I was advised to ignore what was in other people's glasses. It was none of my business just as it's no one's business what's in your glass
Taking your focus off AL & placing it on your surroundings, companions, your dinner plate, etc sounds simplistic but it really works!

Stick around now, we tend to rub off on people!!!

[finallydone]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

Lavande;1553308 wrote: Hi there FD,

Sorry about your relapse but glad to see you came right back!
Finding our triggers & planning ahead how to handle them without AL is big!!!!

When I first started here I was advised to ignore what was in other people's glasses. It was none of my business just as it's no one's business what's in your glass
Taking your focus off AL & placing it on your surroundings, companions, your dinner plate, etc sounds simplistic but it really works!

Stick around now, we tend to rub off on people!!!

Lavande I learned a great lesson not to leave a place where I know where this people who understand me.

[finallydone]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

Thank you MWO crew! You kept me sober today. I was so happy how I rebuilt my life from a near fatal car accident and being sober and loving life again. I forgot the most important thing. Life. I lost my way because I off dumb stubborn pride. I thought I could just bring it all back together without real help. I am soo grateful that my boss at work is behind me 100 percent. And my family is as well. I realize more than ever I need a family who I can just vent to who will understand me. No questions asked. It's here. I like AA meetings Celebrate Recovery etc. There always like this hidden agenda in my mind regarding them. Maybe that's my alcoholic mind not willing to surrender. I do however know I have great friends here. I am going to hold on to it. One day and time with you my friends here. Thank you all so much.

[little beagle]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

Finally glad to meet you. I'm glad you are back. How generous of you to help us through your experience. I personally have many triggers. So therefore have to remain vigilant. I am going to keep that poor diet in mind. Maybe losing discipline in one important area of your life can lead to a break down in other areas?

[lifechange]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

Welcome back Finally done!! I've followed your posts and progress the past year and was wondering if you were still around. Happy that you are again and interested to hear about what you have learned/ are learning. This is a great idea for a thread. thank you! During the past 10 years, I have only had short stints of sobriety, 2 months being the longest, and I'm determined to get it this time. I have been a perpetual liar--to myself and others-- convincing myself, usually that I could moderate. After a week or two or 3 (usually this amount of time is doable for me) feeling great and thinking, hey maybe I'm not as bad as I thought.... I can keep it under control for a week or so and then I'm in the middle of a horror binge, struggling to get that first day under my belt again. I've been so easily led astray-- and I think it has partially to do with not accepting that this is a life times work, i know it gets easier, but we must not become complacent -- also not truly being grateful that I have the chance to live a full life and not being in contact enough with others recovering. I read a lot here, but I didn't make the commitment to participate-- probably 'cause I knew I didn't want to "really" stop. Proper nutrition, helps me immensely as well. SO, ramble ramble, I' am so glad you are here and will look forward to reading your posts.

[Byrdlady]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

Hey Finally!!!! Gosh, I have thought about you 1000 times over the past few months!
I'm so sorry that you are here....but I'm not sorry that we are on this journey together. There is strength in numbers! Climb right back up and let's get this show on the road! So good to see you back!! Much love and admiration, Byrdie

[mama bear]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

I just saw this sweet friend. I am so proud of you for being here.
I get complacent, and think one or two drinks will be fine.......wrong!!
AA is dead on...keep going to the meetings......
Please stay on touch or K9 and I will be hunting you down.

[finallydone]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

lifechange, byrdie, and mamabear so glad to be back amongst my friends here:h

Mollyka- Isn't it so insane how AL creeps and lurks around. I basically was drinking in my mind 2 weeks before I took the drink. It's so true when they say ALers problem isn't the first drink but it's the last drink and one is never enough and neither is 2000.

[Unwasted]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

FD, I remember you well. Big welcome back!:welcome:

I'm not sure we posted on the same threads, but I think our falls parallel. I made a very thought-out decision to drink after 7 months sober (I've been back here now a little while trying to make it work again).

A lifetime of drinking and having that giddy, fun feeling with friends - the aspect of celebrating is what undermines me. The sort of flatlining feeling that can come with being sober, then the recollection of the easiness, the warmth and loving everyone and everything when I drink.....the nice contrast to the tediousness of life. I have no problem not drinking when alone - so it's the social aspect for me.....and the desire for a contrast to daily life.

Of course, at least for me, those warm, fuzzy feelings turn out to be phony, and the next day is a walk down the dark road of exhaustion and hangover even if I don't drink much at all. .

I am now committed to getting my jollies through hiking and other outdoor activities and am in fact moving to Colorado in part to have access to healthy, invigorating pursuits that I hope will replace my old bad habits with a different kind of exhilaration!

Best to you,
UN :lilheart:

[finallydone]

The Great Relapse and ready to go again!

Unwasted;1553502 wrote: FD, I remember you well. Big welcome back!:welcome:

I'm not sure we posted on the same threads, but I think our falls parallel. I made a very thought-out decision to drink after 7 months sober (I've been back here now a little while trying to make it work again).

A lifetime of drinking and having that giddy, fun feeling with friends - the aspect of celebrating is what undermines me. The sort of flatlining feeling that can come with being sober, then the recollection of the easiness, the warmth and loving everyone and everything when I drink.....the nice contrast to the tediousness of life. I have no problem not drinking when alone - so it's the social aspect for me.....and the desire for a contrast to daily life.

Of course, at least for me, those warm, fuzzy feelings turn out to be phony, and the next day is a walk down the dark road of exhaustion and hangover even if I don't drink much at all. .

I am now committed to getting my jollies through hiking and other outdoor activities and am in fact moving to Colorado in part to have access to healthy, invigorating pursuits that I hope will replace my old bad habits with a different kind of exhilaration!

Best to you,
UN :lilheart:

Hi unwasted! I remember you as well too! You put it so well with the warm and fuzzy feeling and than the next day feeling of death it's insane.