Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

[Rahulthesweet]

The tile does reminds me a of movie confessions of vampire ... Which came in 90s. And strange irony ....in the movie the man a vampire ... Immortal .... Sucking life of others ... Sick of his "life" and wanting to die ...

And here I was just 40 days back ..... A mortal ... Also sucking life of myself and others around me .... Sick of myself drinking .... Wanting to live !!

I wish I can some how confess all bad doings I have inflicted to others especially my immediate family and bring back lost time ... Time I wasted drinking.

I confess I am an alcoholic ....
I confess I am a cheat ...
I confess I am a liar ....
I confess I am weak ...
I confess I am insecure ...
I confess I am bad ...
I confess it's my fault ...
I confess I am sick ...
I confess I have been a bad son, father a husband ...
I confess I am an alcoholic ...

.... And one day ... I will gather strength and will confidently use "was" in above lines ....

For today is not that day ... But I gather strength minute after minute, hour after hour and day after day... Hoping one day I will be truly forgiven for the confessions ...

That day will come and till then I march on ... Gathering strength and with support of all and each one of you ... Just like an ants builds a house pick dust ... Or a bees with their friends fills its house from feeding on infinite flowers ... Or a bird brining small stems painstakingly building a nest where we all can can share our confessions ... And ask for forgiveness and gather strength ...

I don't know what I just wrote but just wanted to express ... :upset:

[TJAF]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

Well stated Rahul. Keep the strength and fight the good fight.

[K9Lover]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

Congratulations! Seems like you just joined our happy little family and now look at you!!!

We will be here every step of the way as you change "am" to "was"....


Amazing job :l

[Unwasted]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

Awww Rahul, your post choked me up. I know someday you will feel you deserve to say "was" and be the man you want to be.

You're doing so well. I'm very happy for you. :l

[broken halo]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

Rahul, well done on your 40 days. 40 days ago you did all these things. Regret is all very well but you are doing everything you can to change that. You should be proud of yourself, you have given yourself hope and a chance to continue on this positive path. Well done :l

[Byrdlady]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

Rahul, what a moving post....
Acceptance is sometimes the hardest piece of the puzzle to fit....but you are doing it. Time heals so many things, and the regrets you have will fade and be replaced by new and wonderful memories! I'm living proof of that! You will be, too!
Byrdie

[little beagle]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

You are inspiring.

[Sake123]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

Rahul - Thank you for sharing...it is liberating to put a voice or pen to how you really feel. And I hope that soon enough you will change all those statements to past tense. Doing all that you are doing to make your life a better one will inspire those around you. And those you love will, in time, see through your actions that you are truly are a good person.

[C-Developer]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

Rahul,

Many of your words strike a particular chord with me. I got to the point I was almost unable to look at myself in the mirror I was so ashamed at what I had become. I began to ask myself: I am really an awful human being, or is the alcohol in my life just morphing me into a conniving, deceitful, womanizing waste of space?

Since getting off the booze, I have a slightly better perspective on the matter, and I have come to the conclusion that, while I am certainly no saint, I am not a bad person. I have noticed that my natural human empathy for those around me and my general concern for others is starting to return.

Alcohol was robbing me of my humanity and turning me into the most self centered D-bag on the face of the planet. I am only just now starting to take back my life, I am confident that you will also in due time my friend.

[hadit]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

Rahul, Thank you for such a moving post:thanks:

[Fisher80]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

Thanks, Rahul. Just what I needed to start an AF day.

[3June2013]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

Congrats Rahul hasn't the time flown by? You've faced your challenges head on and you're now inspiring others, that's what I'd call a success!

[Rahulthesweet]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

3June2013;1554774 wrote: Congrats Rahul hasn't the time flown by? You've faced your challenges head on and you're now inspiring others, that's what I'd call a success!

Tanks all. I have just walked a mile .... There is a marathon ahead. ... Which is never ending ... :thanks:

[free at last]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

Rahul, you have come so far in a short time. Glad to see you gaining strength and momentum.

[Icanwithoutacan]

Confessions of an alcoholic ... After 40 days AF !

Great post