Disgusted

[13sept]

so disgusted with myself
No idea how last night finished
Why do I self distruct
Why can't I get a handle on it
I have no interest or motivation to do anything.and am so tired
How can I stop this self distruct I need help but what and where

I am starting again on day 1 hopefully I will be able to
Lick it this time

[Byrdlady]

Disgusted

More sympathetic I could not be. I wish I could say I got it right on the first try but I certainly DID NOT. I was 11 days short of a solid year with Day 1's. It only takes a couple of AF days to make you feel good again! Come join us in the newbie's nest, you'll have great company and someone's always around! You came back, so that's a win already! Dust yourself off....we can help! Hugs, Byrdie

[broken halo]

Disgusted

welcome 13! We have all had our disgusted moments. I remember mine only too well. You can do this. As Byrdie says, even a few days of sobriety can make a world of a difference.

You deserve better. We all do. Stay with us and give it a go. What do you have to lose?

[available]

Disgusted

Hey 13 welcome back. Disgust can be a good thing to get you back on board and to keep going again. I think if we could donate a dollar for all our Day 1's, we could save the world from hunger. It took me this time to get my head around that I did not want to drink anymore, I didn't want to feel the anger, shame, disgust. I wanted the happiness being AF could bring, the feeling I was worth something to myself and to others. I found the "others" to be on MWO, they know and been there done that. Keep this site open and post and read. You can do it this time or give it your best shot trying.

[Sake123]

Disgusted

Welcome! I too, totally understand where you're coming from and where you've been and where you're at. I wish you all the luck and strength you need to get off the alcohol. This is a great forum with some wonderful (and wise) people. Lean on them for support. We can all do this together.

[Kailey]

Disgusted

Byrdlady;1562825 wrote: More sympathetic I could not be. I wish I could say I got it right on the first try but I certainly DID NOT. I was 11 days short of a solid year with Day 1's. It only takes a couple of AF days to make you feel good again! Come join us in the newbie's nest, you'll have great company and someone's always around! You came back, so that's a win already! Dust yourself off....we can help! Hugs, Byrdie

Thank you for this post. I, too, am so tired of trying and trying and landing flat on my face. I keep telling myself not to give up, that this might be the time it sticks and if I don't give it one more try I'll never know. I'll head back to the Newbies Nest, too. I was feeling too embarrassed to post... it just seemed as soon as I posted about a good day I would slip that night. Argh!

[gettingthere]

Disgusted

I could have written your post...word for word. I am still drunk from last night's binge and I dread the hours that lie ahead. Hang in there. If you will....I will. So much good advice from wise people here. Stay close.

[NoSugar]

Disgusted

13sept wrote:
I am starting again on day 1 hopefully I will be able to
Lick it this time
You can, 13Sept! This can be your last day 1! Make this your top priority (after meeting your personal responsibilities). If you haven't been there already, the Newbies Nest is a great place to hang out.

gettingthere;1563199 wrote: I could have written your post...word for word. I am still drunk from last night's binge and I dread the hours that lie ahead. Hang in there. If you will....I will. So much good advice from wise people here. Stay close.

Hi, Gettingthere

Even though you're not technically a Newbie, you certainly would be welcome in the Nest! There are many people there giving this another try. There definitely is strength in numbers!

[free at last]

Disgusted

Dear Sept 13 and Getting There,

I first joined MWO in April 2010. I think I made 8 or 9 serious efforts to become AF. Finally, this time I broke a two month barrier and am now on day 75. I don't think that I am out of the woods -- several times each week I think about a glass of wine. But I think back to what my life was like before this point and I know I don't want that.

This is a journey -- sometime you truly are getting through it a few moments at a time, but step by step you can overcome this addiction.

[MossRose]

Disgusted

Hi 13 and welcome. I completely understand how you feel right now. Been there way too many times. But I've read these responses, and you have some of the wisest and kindest people from MWO standing right by your side. When you feel weak, re-read their posts, k? These folks get it - and their advice is golden. Glad you are here. Hope to get to know you much better.

[corgipups]

Disgusted

(wittsend)

Hello 13
glad your here just keep close we have all had the same experience but hang in it will click with you the main thing is to keep trying