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    Square 1

    I've gone and done it again. I feel like I am insane.
    My family is so sick of me, and I am sick of myself.
    I have great long stretches, and then I start all over.
    I don't want to do this anymore.
    I just want to be done. Why can't I just be done?

    This is me starting over. Again.
    Day 1 again 11/5/19
    Goal 1: 7 days :heartbeat:
    Goal 2: 14 days :happy2:
    Goal 3: 21 days :happy2:
    11/27/19: messed up but back on track
    12/14/19: bad doozy but back on track

    One day at a time.

    #2
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    Hi Nursie,

    Maybe you can write down everything you're feeling right now while it's still raw, a letter to yourself that you can review and re-read when the drinking might find itself back in. Hope this is the last day one for you friend.
    2023 - focus, getting it done, and living the way it should be and being the person I need to be.

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      #3
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      Hey Nursie :l Remember that you have done good long stretches. So, you can do this.:h Hang in there.....we are going to do this. Why don't you join us over on the Sober October thread or the One Step at a Time thread? Both of us are keeping me going. :l
      "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
      ..........
      AF - 7-27-15

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        #4
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        Hey Nursie, I am back at square one too and feel as terrible as you do. Let's make sure we get right back on that sobriety wagon for good this time! :l
        Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it! ~ Goethe

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          #5
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          The sky is darkest before the dawn. Yes you blipped. But you are human. Good humans at that. So there's nothing else to do but draw the line, redouble efforts and set sail on another long voyage of AF joy. You know you can so do we. You can't change the past but the future is yours to shape. Good luck! We're all behind you:h
          Last drink 6th September 2013

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            #6
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            They say time heals all wounds but they don't tell you that time also lets you forget why you gave up in the first place.

            I keep a very clear picture of my last night of binging. It is such a bad memory that it scares me straight every time I even think about alcohol.

            AK
            AF since 1st Sep 2012
            NF since 1st Sep 2012

            If you want to feel better visit www.hopeforpaws.org

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              #7
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              :l

              I'm new and scared. Hugs.

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                #8
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                There's nothing to be scared of though? Once you stop drinking the future gets better every day. The past is behind you. Day 37 for me and the only thing I am scared of is wasps. :H

                Come here often where you will be in good company and these fine folks will help inspire you to the bright new life you deserve for yourself:welcome:
                Last drink 6th September 2013

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                  #9
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                  Sorry nursie,its just this stupid crap were trying to beat,i was just thinking of you the other day wondering how you were,just dust off and start over,youve done it before you can do it again for the last time
                  I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

                  I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
                  Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

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                    #10
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                    I keep my last binge in my mind clearly too. It has helped me those times I wanted a drink. Like this weekend. Keep posting and reading.
                    I liked the setting sail for a voyage of af bliss. Sounds wonderful. I shall use that mental image.
                    Good to have you back with us Nursie.
                    No matter how far you go or how fast you run, you can't get away from yourself. ....said at an AA meeting. It stuck with me.

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                      #11
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                      Nursie - glad to see you back but sorry you are hurting. As allswell said, maybe a journal would help. And some serious self-care - a hot bath by candlelight, good food, a massage if you can do it. I am assuming by your screen name that you care for others all day long, so please extend that same love and kindness to yourself. I have had so many Day One's that I have lost count. But we must never stop trying. Stay close. We are here. xx
                      Everything is going to be amazing

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                        #12
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                        Thank you all for your positive words.
                        We can do this together!
                        Day 1 again 11/5/19
                        Goal 1: 7 days :heartbeat:
                        Goal 2: 14 days :happy2:
                        Goal 3: 21 days :happy2:
                        11/27/19: messed up but back on track
                        12/14/19: bad doozy but back on track

                        One day at a time.

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                          #13
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                          Stick with it Nursie.

                          I'm in your corner too.

                          G bloke.

                          'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

                          Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

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                            #14
                            Square 1

                            Thanks G.
                            Day 1 again 11/5/19
                            Goal 1: 7 days :heartbeat:
                            Goal 2: 14 days :happy2:
                            Goal 3: 21 days :happy2:
                            11/27/19: messed up but back on track
                            12/14/19: bad doozy but back on track

                            One day at a time.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Square 1

                              How are you feeling today Nursie? I hope you are lots better :l
                              Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it! ~ Goethe

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