Fresh Start!!!!!

[j-vo]

That would have been a tough moment for me, too, Daisy. You handled that gracefully. And I'm glad you got to see the end result. It's like playing the tape to the end except you got a real, live version. And imagine what they'll feel like tomorrow morning!!!!!

[abcowboy]

I agree with j-vo Daisy, and I wonder who is going to be jealous of who tomorrow morning lol. You had a fleeting moment of feeling jealous, they are going to have most of the day tomorrow being jealous of how you're feeling!

[daisy45]

It is good to see the end result live....reaffirms how I don't want to be.
And yep, feeling good today. No big plans. Going for a swim soon and intend to get my Calligraphy gear out when I get home. Haven't touched it in a year so I will need practice.
Having an easy day as we are all heading out tomorrow to the Christmas markets and a restaurant to celebrate my daughter's 21st.....I wil be driving.

[j-vo]

Happy Birthday to your daughter! And today you get to enjoy the day feeling good and unhung!

[daisy45]

My second youngest J-vo. The yougest will be 20 in 3 weeks and that is me done with the teenage years. Now for the next stage! My eldest daughter is 4 months pregnant and since she found out Mr Boyfriend is being a bit of a twat....caan't see that lasting but we will see.

Pleased with myself today...got my first swimming mile done since I started drinking again....64 lengths. I normally do 50 but like to challenge myself with a wee bit extra.
Another little sober gift!

[lifechange]

Super, Daisy!!!
64 lengths is quite a nice gift to give to yourself..
Isn't it nice to have your body and mind in sync? I don't know if you felt similarly, but when I was drinking I had such guilt about what I was doing to my poor body.. here were my legs carrying me around, my heart beating on like always, my liver managing to survive, my stomach and intestines keeping it together through all of the abuse..etc., etc! Now I'm trying to make up for it a bit.. being gentle, listening, exercising, taking in better nutrition..

I'm glad to follow your journey here, Daisy.. you're doing so well keeping accountable, talking it out.

[daisy45]

Thanks Lifechange. A big congratulations on your first 30 days of this sober life!
I actually felt my body breaking down in different ways....got very worried about muscle twitches, pins and needles, panic attacks. Was taking medication to help with the anxiety but then found that it also helped with other symptoms above. I could probably get away with more drinking as long as I kept telling the doctor about my anxiety and therefore keep recieving medication. Without the medication my body can no longer deal with drinking. Maybe the odd night, yes, but as we all know that would never happen.
I have never taken medication and thought 'What the feck are you playing at?'
I stopped the drinking and haven't had a pill from the same date. It just became too much. I have a funny feeling this is my time......so glad to have you here with me.

[j-vo]

out of teenage years, but always our babies.

[daisy45]

Day 29 and feeling fine!!
Having a wee much-needed quiet day. No real motivation but that is ok. Wanted time to read more on here. Especially interested in the discussion and information being shared on the 3Ps thresd.
Our day out on Sunday for my daughters birthday did not go so well. Belfast was packed so going to the markets was overcrowded and uncomfortable. Then went to 4 different restaurants and were turned away as they wete over booked. Ended up going to a lovely place . The manager recognised my son as he had done some work nearby......sent down a bottle of Prosecco and 6 glasses.
Very nice of him.....but, another situation where I was thinking 'it would have been nice to join in'.......the thought did not need to be dealt with as I knew I would not drink.

[lifechange]

Well done, Daisy!
I find it difficult at times, too, in such situations. But it's just for a few moments.. I'm finally learning to really play it forward and throwing away my AF time (which I would be doing-- 'cause I know my mind would be f***** again) just isn't worth the 30 minutes-hour that "normal" drinkers enjoy ONE! glass. And it most definitely isn't worth what I would 100% put myself through. I've done it enough times to know it's 100%. Tried and tested (and tired to death of it!!):happy2: So looking forward to celebrating your 30 days tomorrow with some sort of sparkling fruit seltzer.. what's your favourite juice? Or I make a delicious Mexican hot chocolate/coffee..

[daisy45]

Diet coke and coffee Lifechange! (Probably why I am up half the night)
In a hormonal funk today....can hear myself snapping....best left alone on days like this. This is a day when drinking would have been a must for me....just to get away from how I feel.
Will ride it out and know tomorrow morning will be brighter.

[lifechange]

Morning, Daisy!
I'm up with the birds (literally!) with a huge pot of coffee, waiting for you to get out of bed so I can congratulate you on 30 DAYS!!!!
I'm really happy for you and really proud of you, Daisy.. I hope the hormones let up a bit so you can enjoy this day.. I always think I need a place to escape to during my PMS time, to just disappear and not have to deal with anyone..:hug: great accomplishment and on to the next goal, one day at a time..

[daisy45]

Thanks so much Lifechange......I really appreciate your support.
In a much better mood today.....reaching 30 days feels sooo good. I was getting desperate ove the 9 months that I was drinking. I just could not stop completely.
I could feel thoughts creeping in last night which I know are typical of me when nearing a goal.....now I know to be aware of that self-sabotage. I cut short my last AF time at 89 days.....not this time!

[abcowboy]

Great job Daisy, and a great attitude! Keep it up my friend!

[daisy45]

Thanks Cowboy....you have helped so much!