Fresh Start!!!!!

[Starfish1]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Great job, S.S. I definitely understand your wanting to mask (not feel) the emotions with the family drama. You all know I have that going on too. We just need to realized that the drinking just makes it all worse in the long run.
You all are doing such a great job of hanging in there, and I am encouraged by you. My weekend was not what I needed it to be and the situation with my daughter still has no resolution. I will begin again with day 1.

[K9Lover]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Hi Daisies!

Sorry I got so "quiet"...I was out of town for 2 days then yesterday I had the holiday off and boy was I LAZY!!! I didn't even get out of bed until 2pm...I wasn't sleeping, but I was sure enjoying laying there with the dog and a good book! But alas, here I am back at work...darn.

SL - My trigger used to be day 40 for some reason (I still don't know why)...I made it there many times and then Bam! I guess I thought I was "cured". The last eve of day 39 I stayed in the Nest ALL DAY and Byrdie and Lav and others convinced me that I could get through the hump and keep moving on. That was 1.5 years ago (?) and I haven't looked back. Just know you CAN do this, it's hard, yes, but it's soooo worth it. And you have us to keep you on track!

Wow, being away from the boards for 3 days makes it hard to catch up...I'm not even gonna try to catch up with the Nest....I'll just start on the last page. LOL

I'll be back later...hang in there Daisies!!! :lilflower::lilflower::lilflower:

[acadiaofmaine]

Fresh Start!!!!!

So good to see so many of you back! And Scottish Lass, I will never grow tired of you! We are kindred spirits!

I wonder if it gets any easier? It seems that in the past when I hit in the 40 day range, I stopped thinking about drinking so much and it all kind of fell into place. Well, until it didn't, and some wild hare got me going again. Usually lunch or dinner with a good friend with whom I had always had lots of wine. Why not this once? I can just get back to the program tomorrow. WRONG WRONG WRONG. Why is it that hard? It makes sense to be able to say WTH for tonight, back on the program tomorrow.

For me, it doesn't work. Kind of depressing, eh?

I think I have to work on the sugar situation. How are you all doing with that? K9, Byrdie, what say you? You are our gurus!!

Ann

[K9Lover]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Ann - I went on a sugar binge when I first quit, and although it's let up a lot, I still crave sweets more than I ever have in my entire life. I just make a conscious decision to ride out that craving too....it WILL pass just like the damn AL cravings do Early in your quit, I wouldn't worry too much about it....one thing at a time!

[Kailey]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Hi, just a very quick check in from work. I can't believe how well the daisies are doing! Even those of you who are feeling a little flat or blah...that's such a better place than you were just a few weeks ago when you felt out of control and sick of your self! Pat yourselves on the back!!!

[scottish lass]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Hi all - Star, sad to say I am on day 1 as well - CRAP!
Sick of this nonsense, wish I knew why I did it to myself - so silly...
Found out that my divorce that I thought was to be final by end of year, will not be until way into next year as my ex has not followed thru (nothing new there - but damn!) - I left him three years ago and so need this to be over - had such hopes that 2013 was teh end and 2014 was new start, well 2014 looks like more of the same...
Thank You Ann - you made me smile - I almost did not sign in today, but now glad I did...
Hi Ishy, K9, SS - sorry for all the dramas we are struggling with - I am using mine as excuses and that is wrong...
See you on day 2 Star - gotta get this mess worked out....

[Kailey]

Fresh Start!!!!!

SL and Star, you are both making this a lot easier for me... I'm on Day 1 again, too. I did not want to have to post it here, but it helps to be in the company of two women I admire greatly!

I'm through beating much self up and wondering why I keep acting against my deepest convictions. I'm ready to just move forward. This was the third time I drank since I joined this site. While not perfect, it's SO much better than I was doing before (drinking every day!)

So, the new quit date is 11/12/13. That's got a nice ring to it. I think I'll keep it!

[scottish lass]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Hey Kailey - had not even thought of the date....hmmm, hopefully that is a good omen for us?
I had even decided not to use MWO as I didn't want to admit to drinking, nor did I want to lie - but glad I came back and glad Star showed the way...
Evening on Day 1 and feeling better now..
I am also doing so much better than I have, and keep moving forward - it has to count for something....:l:l

[Starfish1]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Let's get through this together, SL and Kailey :l
Ann, Ishy and SS- we are following you! Keep up the great work!
Daisy, take our hands...we are waiting for you :l

We are still working on the best resolution for my daughter. She still refuses to be seen by a doctor and blames everyone else for her problems. She thinks that if she can just get away from her family, all of her problems will be solved. She has no job, no money, no place to go, nothing. Yet she believes everything will be solved for her if she just gets away from us. I have done everything I can to try to convince her to see a doctor or a counselor and get things off her chest. She thinks nothing is wrong with her and refuses to go. So we are at the point of letting her leave (and possibly find her rock bottom) so she will realize that she does need help, or commit her to the hospital. Tough decision, but I have to keep my wits about me...no more running away...it only makes things worse.

Have a great day everyone. We can do this!

[Cocoflo]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Kailey, Star & Scottish Lass,

What an upbeat thread! Do you mind if I jump in? Yesterday was my day one (again!!) too. I hope the date is a good omen for me as well.

I'm trying to not beat myself up over this, instead, just pick up the pieces and try again.

Star, is your daughter struggling with mental illness?

Best,
Cocoflo

[Kailey]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Star, I am so sorry about the struggles you are having with your daughter. I can't imagine. I hope things resolve soon.

I'm learning something on this thread. I need to be honest, no matter what. I was afraid to post that I had slipped again. Partly because I was embarrassed, but mostly because I didn't want to negatively affect anyone else. I was feeling unworthy among a bunch of winners. I thank you, Star, so much for posting about your slip. It broke the ice for both SL and me.

The fact that we slipped has no correlation with how much we want this. That's why Daisy started this thread in the first place. Those of us who have tried and tried but won't quit gravitated to her message.

All that being said, I'm not opening the door for myself to say it's okay to keep having problems with this. I know that what I want is sobriety with no breaks. I know that life will be easier and make more sense when I can finally get there. I feel compelled to put my quit date in my signature to solidify any way I can that I'm done with day ones!

For those of you who are racking up the days, keep it up! It is so gratifying to watch your successes.

And Daisy, I hope some day you log on and see you have a troop of Daisies who are working so hard to achieve the goal that you yourself want so much! We are all cut from the same bolt of cloth. Come back!

[Kailey]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Cocoflo;1584528 wrote: Kailey, Star & Scottish Lass,

What an upbeat thread! Do you mind if I jump in? Yesterday was my day one (again!!) too. I hope the date is a good omen for me as well.

I'm trying to not beat myself up over this, instead, just pick up the pieces and try again.

Star, is your daughter struggling with mental illness?

Best,
Cocoflo

Crosspost, Coco! Yes of course you are welcome! That puts four of us on Day 2 today. That should give us a lot of momentum!

[Starfish1]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Welcome, Coco :l, please join us here. The more the merrier.

Kailey, your post brought tears to my eyes. I think this group of daisies is so much alike in our thoughts and hopes. We are truly kindred spirits.
I am going to add my quit date to my signature line again, because I agree with you that it makes me more accountable.

I also agree with you that we all need to be honest with one another on this thread. We are all struggling and we all understand how difficult this battle is. We also understand how much we all want to overcome this horrible disease. The worse thing we can do is lie to each other or avoid each other because of our weaknesses.

I (myself) also would like to make a commitment (this is scary) to follow something that NoSugar has suggested before, and that is to post my intentions to drink before I do so again. I think I can be talked out of it, if I just post first.

Coco, thanks for saying that this is an uplifting thread. I agree and hope to keep it that way. I am sorry to discuss problems with my daughter here, but, I have been using her illness as an excuse to drink lately, so her illness is relevant to my recovery.

You ask if she is mentally ill. Well, that remains to be seen, since she refuses to be diagnosed by a doctor or even seek counseling. She is 26 years old and lives at home. As I said in my earlier post, she hasn't got a penny to her name and refuses to do anything to help herself. She suffers from OCD, extreme paranoia and self-neglect. Everyone who knows her and the three counselors that I have spoken with about her all agree that she needs medicine and counseling. I have tried everything I know to get her to go willingly, but she refuses. It is so hard to take that step to force her to get treatment, but time is running out.

Thank you all for being here and for your support. I will try to do better at checking in and supporting you.
We can do this!


:h Star

[scottish lass]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Well now - day 2 is so much nicer than day 1 isn't it!!
I will add the date to my signature as well and look forward to celebrating as we go along - so great to have a team of 4 now, and such a good group to be following along with. Welcome Coco!!
I agree with posting as we start to waiver - looking back, I think I was starting to do that Sunday/Monday - just hadn't got to stage of saying it out loud (or actually realising what I was thinking to do)
So Daisies, lets do this!

[acadiaofmaine]

Fresh Start!!!!!

Hi Coco,

Welcome welcome! This is a great thread and we are kind of in the same place! Just came back from therapy, or "shrinkage" as I like to call it. She really wants me to go to AA. She even told me she was in recovery (which I had guessed but not mentioned) and we talked a little about that. I guess I'll give it a shot. There are meetings very near by. SIgh. I have never wanted this, but I am still feeling very fragile and uncertain. way too much shame around this stuff.... Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

SL, how goes it? Kailey, Star? Anyone heard from Daisy?

Ann