Failed Again

[Darkest Diamond]

Utterly sick of myself, failed again, last night while finishing off work at home drank a lot very quickly. Now I will get the bus in..... just sick of it all. Will post in about a month when I have sorted out the mess, feel utterly disappointed in myself DD xx

[lifechange]

Failed Again

Oh, DD-- I am sorry as I know exactly how you feel.:l I don't think it's the best idea to stay away for a month. What about starting again today- One day at a time beginning NOW. Come over to the Nest and continue to share with us. It's easier with support, really it is, and we are all here to help you. We all understand. It's so easy, when you're feeling down and angry at yourself to get caught up in the mess again. We all f*** up, but we have the ability to change that.--You CAN get out of this and don't ever have to feel this way again. big hugs to you..

[available]

Failed Again

DD sorry to hear but dont as LC said stay away a month, keep on here, you are not disappointing us, we are here to support you and we all understand what you are going through. You have done Day1 so keep doing it and if you do lots of day 1's then you have also had AF days in between. I never had AF days when I was not on here. Keep positive.

Hey LC how are you going girl? Been so busy lately that i have not had time to write but i have been on here reading everyones posts and still trying to figure how to post damn pics from the hens night. May have to ask those tech savvy boys like CD and Gambler.

[DreamThinkDo]

Failed Again

DD, you can still sort out any messes while being here. You know how much support and unconditional acceptance the people have here - use it to get better!

[broken halo]

Failed Again

DD, it sounds as though you have been under loads of pressure lately with work. Can you maybe speak to someone in HR about that? Your workload is shocking! Do you think you drank because of that?

Don't you dare stay away for a month, you get right back on here after work. How on earth can we support you if you aren't here? I hope you feel okay today, please post later and let us know how you are. :l

[mlisa]

Failed Again

Chin up DD. We've all been there, time & time again, so we know the disappointment & anger you're feeling at yourself. There's so much support here, just make it a blip & get straight back into it. As we all know, the longer we leave it, the more out of control it gets & the harder it is to get back on the right path again. You can do it. x

[paulywogg]

Failed Again

DD,going away will not do you any good! do you know how many times ive chose to drink and think i should just stay away from here?too damn many! its better just to stick with us,you never know if youll read something,or meet somebody here who gives you strength to finally get this shit out of your life,i know exactly how you feel right now,please stay with us

[Kailey]

Failed Again

Darkest Diamond, I'm so sorry. I've been there a million times. Each time we fail it takes another chunk out of our self-esteem. Another blow to our confidence. That defeated voice is the one that's telling you to leave for a month. Tell it to go f$&@ itself and stick around!

[K9Lover]

Failed Again

DD :l

To echo what the others have said, PLEASE do not leave! Even if you're not doing as well as you think you should be doing, we are here for you. We can support you through this. Whether you quit today, tomorrow, next week or next month, we can help you. We really do understand how HARD this is. If I had a dollar...no, a penny...for every day I woke up hating myself for drinking the night before, I'd be retired sitting on a beach somewhere right now. You are NOT ALONE in this. Together we can get you through this...but you have to stick around. We need you as much as you need us :h

[Darkest Diamond]

Failed Again

Delegating... the way forward?

A huge thank you to everyone, I want to get and stay sober, so thanks

I also know people who do the same job who work less hours. Will go on work related forums and pick up tips, no point talking to colleagues as nearly all of them at my level do similar hours.

Also there are so many moments of every working day that I treasure. There are moments of intense satisfaction and great happiness. I love everyone I work with, not quite so keen on the boss, but the rest of us are like a family. Most of us have worked together for several years and the three new recent people are a delight. They have brought a lot to the firm. We are all very happy together.

This year I have some very challenging clients, but I am still doing everything I am supposed to do and building up good work related relationships. Today I had praise from boss at performance management meeting.

I have a mini team who I lead at work............... only four people but they are wonderful, I am going to start delegating more ....today I got in an hour and a half later than normal and it was superb to see that one of my mini team had got all the basic things in place............... WOW!!! (lots of initiative used as I had not phoned or emailed)

Work wise this has been the most challenging year ever, I am not using that as an excuse, but it has not helped.... re drinking.
DD (love and thanks to all xxx)

[broken halo]

Failed Again

Good to see you back! Delegation is the way forward, I couldn't get through my workload without it! It's all very well loving your job, I do too but it shouldn't interfere with your home life to such an extent. I bet you don't get paid for all the extra hours you are putting in!

Anyway, back on the horse Mrs, you know you can do it

[MossRose]

Failed Again

DD - just want you to know that I am thinking of you. Please don't disappear. We need you. And we want to be there for you. I know that things seem bleak right now, so lean on us. Wish I could give you a big hug in person. xxxxxx

And yes - delegation is the answer. People always amaze me with how well they can, and will do, if given the chance. Hang in there.