Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

[Eloise]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

I think this is a positive thread for u to join Ican.
And I too need a place to express myself that feels sort of relaxed & drama free.
Easy does it.
I know goal setting is hugely important, but we still need to get through these early dangerous days. At least I do.
So, I will take a slow but determined pace today.

I was just at the gym reflecting on my situation & trying to be empathetic to myself. I live in a new place where I don't know many people ( been invited to one social gathering in 14 months ) & don't speak the language. Of course I feel isolated. Of course my drinking has gotten worse.
It's okay. I am just going to focus on getting healthy.

[Queenbug]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Great thread...I've started and stopped a fair few times too...learning that coming back isn't ' failure...it's determination.
am hearing you all about schedules and routines...always look forward to a break from work...always fall apart...crazy business!!!!
Just reading a book a called Drink by Ann someone....focussing on girls and women and alcohol...some really good points in there I thought....
day 5 now for me...woke with serious panics and the blues...but we can all do it...give it up and stay sober...hang on in there : )) xx

[Queenbug]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Eloise .... You sound like you have taken on a huge challenge there...new country etc....like you say...focus on getting strong and healthy...wish I had the mojo to gym it...we'll done girl x

[Eloise]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

j-vo;1577780 wrote: Eloise,
Congrats on day 7!! And glad you got that schedule together. I know it helps me.

Speaking of flip flops, i don't know if this caused it, but I have planters faschitis. I've been getting treated for this at the chiropractor. He healed it before. But it's painful!

had to look that one up- faschitis
my trouble is that i now have a bone that isn't where is belongs and touches the ground when i walk. very painful.
got orthodics but not helping. now i have a numb toe- and as i am in a strange land i really don't know what to do? supposedly it is correctable but i am just wondering when that might happen? it's over a year now and getting worse.
anyhow. makes exercise a lot more painful and i cannot go nuts like I used to... i think this effects my thinking as well- don't get rid of all those grey thoughts.

[Eloise]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Queenbug;1577996 wrote: Eloise .... You sound like you have taken on a huge challenge there...new country etc....like you say...focus on getting strong and healthy...wish I had the mojo to gym it...we'll done girl x

if i don't go to the gym i become someone else! i guess i can be grateful for my love of exercise- i go to classes- but some are more like dance class which i find very fun. the key is finding some kind of activity that you really enjoy- i love walks too but have foot trouble these days... beach walks are my favorite (and the doggies)!

but yeah... EVERYTHING (except my dog) is different now.
hm. and no job to act as a buffer so i've started a small business out of our home. i figured it i didn't do something this fall things might get ugly.

[Icanwithoutacan]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Finishing day 5. Wow Eloise a totally different language - how fun but difficult! Thanks for the warm welcome....
Hi jvo MR and coco and QB!!!! Hope you are all tucked in safe

[Eloise]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Hiccup

Queenbug;1577994 wrote: Great thread...I've started and stopped a fair few times too...learning that coming back isn't ' failure...it's determination.

Okay, well thanks for writing this it helped me to come running directly back here after last night. I drank. Yup.
I am not beating myself up, but looking at it as part of the process of quitting for good.

I have decided I am not going back to counting from day one either:new:. I will count today as a second day 8 and move ahead. Otherwise I think it is too self defeating. If I start feeling bad about my moment of weakness then it discounts the wonderful 7.5 days I managed AF. I have also reconsidered how to look at quitting and I do need to set more long term goals. So I am going to look at living the month of November AF (except for one day, which was yesterday).
Beating myself up about last night is counter productive, I am moving forward.

[Eloise]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Not sure why that little weird "I'm new here" dude jumped in there?

[Queenbug]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

I'm glad it helped you to come back and stopped you possibly doing what I've done before and feel too rubbish about myself - "another thing I'm crap at" kinda thing. Stick with it....it's much easier to do if you can surround yourself with people that can help to keep you going...that's what makes this such a good place. Wishing you strong vibes....big love x

[Icanwithoutacan]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Interesting to count as second 8 (maybe a *8) my bank always puts that asterisk when a check is skipped! Good day to move on...

[Eloise]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Thanks for your encouragement Queenbug- you hit the nail on the head.
And an asterek by the 8 is a good idea- a reminder to yours truly. and I cannot express to you have difficult learning Dutch is- really a crazy idea at my age, but I am doing it. Kind of miraculous. If I can learn Dutch I can CERTAINLY quit the wine. It is about time!

[Queenbug]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

DUTCH! That's such a hard one.....a friend of mine has recently moved to Finland...and is really struggling with learning the language....like I said that's a great challenge :goodjob:....makes me feel a bit lazy :H x

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

HI all! Sorry I haven't replied to recent posts. Yesterday sis and I did a road trip to visit parents. Dad in a cast from hip to toe and in rehab facility. He's looking good and will have cast off hopefully in two weeks.

I've been doing some self reflection. I know everyone must find their own way out. Just a like one medicine will not cure the same illness in different people or we need different dosages of the same meds, we've got to find the things that work for us. I'd gone to AA before, and I didn't agree with its methods. That's not the only way out and I'm feeling more confident in this thought. I know what works for me and if I need to tweak it, them I will. I know that supporting you all, receiving support, reading all the valuable info at this site is important to me. I'm so glad I found wonderful people here.

I was I also thinking this morning about "labeling" oneself. I'm a teacher, and no matter how we try to pretend that the kids with the labels are no different, it still happens. People know their labels and are judgmental. I guess it's human nature but it hurts to see that. It creates a low self esteem in oneself. It creates frustrations. I decided that I will continue to not drink, but I don't want to label myself as an alcoholic. Too many negative reactions with that, even in my own mind. I'm a person that doesn't drink because its never been a healthy choice and I have bad reactions to alcohol. I like the feeling of having control of my recovery/lifestyle change. I like knowing that if I get on here as much as I can, that will be good for me. I went to meetings and was made to feel bad about myself. That's counter productive in my mind.

Icanwithoutacan, welcome!!! So glad you're joining us in our quest for better health!

Mossrose, hi! Hope you're doing well!

Eloise, I like your attitude! That's the thing. No one can take away your sober days. You are on second day 8 and I love that mentality! Keep up the good workouts. I know exercising is one of the best things for our body and minds. Sorry you're feeling lonely right now. If you ever wanna chat, let me know. And good for you for starting your business! Oh, have you tried a chiropractor? Works wonders for me.

Queen bug, I like what you said, coming back is not a failure, it's determination. So true! Again, so glad you posted your story. You're a very strong woman! Oh, drink by Ann - did you get at amazon! Congrats on day 5.

Day 13 here!

[Queenbug]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

J-vo....the book has just been released I think...I downloaded it ...think it's definitely on amazon....a lot of it helped me to understand /appreciate the different impacts/causes etc of alcohol on girls and women....the drinking culture etc....kind of written in a autobiographical style but with some good takes on research etc. it did have a chapter on AA but other stuff too. I'm sure ithe books not for everyone but I found it helpful. Makes me worry for young people though.....crazy drinking culture going on right now...

[Queenbug]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Wow..I am on day 5 aren't i! Thank you xx