Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Feeling better today. I was more myself, which is normally acting sillly with my students and enjoying the day. I know it wasn't PMS, just a blah kind of a day yesterday. I know they say the novelty of being sober wears off, and I don't want it to. I want to know everyday that I'm feeling good because I'm not drinking. I'll keep reminding myself of those bad hangovers, missing out on everyday joyful activities, and now being able to engage myself in those activities with a clear head and feeling confident.

Pavati, Thanks for the great tips. I've done the deep breathing, mainly to help with my severe anxiety issues and that does help lots. I need to get back into the practice of incorporating that at least twice daily, perhaps once during my lunch break. It makes a big difference. And you're right. Life isn't perfect and we'll have our ups and downs. Our moods will change, just as the days and seasons.

Ican, sorry you had a bad night. It's just that, one night. But YOUCAN. Let us help and be there for you.

Eloise, good luck with the starter pack. I know that these supps can be extremely helpful in helping our bodies to find a natural balance. Allan Carr's book is excellent. I've got to dig up other books I've read because I read so many good and inspiring books over the years. I'm going to go into the attic and see what I have. I only hope I didn't get rid of them when I had those "modding" beliefs, got angry that I even thought I was considering I'm an alcoholic, and got rid of them. Keeping my fingers crossed they're still there. As far as feeling a difference with the supps, I'm not sure. You may find some answers in one of the threads below this one where they focus on that topic. Take a look. And take a look at the toolbox in "Monthly Abs." Lots of good stuff there as well. Congrats on your 14 days!

Willow, that's interesting - the full moon and cycle. Never really paid much attention to that, but now I will! I know when it's a full moon, my students are completely nuts. Of course they're 14 years old, so they're nuts most of the time anyhow! Gotta love 'em.

Isty - without the cylce. hmmm. That'll probably be here for me before I know it. But again, it makes sense that your drink pattern spiked at those times, now has more consistency without it. Deep thinking going on here!

Thanks for your support ALL. Have a wonderful evening. Off to the chiropractor shortly.

[Willow23]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Glad you're feeling better today J-Vo. I know, the moon cycle thing is weird, but I always know when it is without looking IYSWIM. I just feel cranky and irritable and then I go,'Oh, I bet it's full moon' - and it is! If I knew it full moon, I'd put it down to a psychological effect, but I don't (well, not consciously).

Night all, thanks so much for the support over the past week x

[Pavati]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Quick check in on day 12. I Can - jump right back on that wagon and come report here next time you feel shaky. We're here for you. I am on my way to work so don't have much time. Will try to check in tonight. Happy Sober Thursday, everyone.

[Eloise]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

okay so i have to make a point of posting at least 1x (2x is better) per day.
It seems if I don't I become overconfident, go home and say 'hey, i'm cool i can have a glass of wine...'
stom van me! stupid.
i do notice the benefit of the supplements, but continue to have the cravings.
i was thinking now that i have the supplements i don't need to be so vigilant. wrong. gonna listen to the mwo cd now before i head home.
wishing everyone a rustig evening.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Evening all,
What a long day. Left home at 6:30 this morning and didn't get back home until 6:15. Met a girlfriend at Chile's restaurant and caught up. She's a light drinker, so she had a beer and I had a diet coke. Oh, and dessert - skillet chocolate chip cookie with ice cream on top with drizzle of hot fudge. Decadent! I didn't feel any cravings as she sipped on her beer. Maybe because the alcohol is out of my system, and I just don't drink! We had a lovely dinner.

Pavati, hope your day went well. You're on day 12, dear, and that's awsome!

Ican, hope you had a better night! Thinking of you.

Eloise, I think mental cravings are harder than physical. But we have to use some of those tricks we're learning on here. Have you looked at the toolbox yet?

Gonna pop over to the nest now. Have a good night all.

[Pavati]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Hi, all:

I had a bit of a craving tonight when I was cooking (a craving for wine which is messed up being that wine is not my poison of choice). I was HUNGRY, so I am here to recommend eating now and worrying about calories when we're more steady.

I have been working a ton and driving kids to all of their things. The one benefit of the dry weather is the opportunity for great outside exercise this weekend.

Do we all have a plan for the weekend? Let's support each other here! No business as usual on Friday night. I'm going to meet a friend for a walk and then I hope to see a movie out. My usual spot for drinking on a Friday night is here in my house, so I will change it up. Stay strong, everyone.

[Eloise]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Pavati- yes let's support each other here this week-end.
I will be sure to pop in & out.
Maybe I will do a little holiday shopping? I work tomorrow which is good. Last night I stayed at work until 7, which made the evening a bit less long.
Plus, I am most tempted between 4-7 so the entire evening was a bit less stressful.
Working the plan. I do think the supplements help.

[935matthew]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Byrdlady;1572780 wrote: J-Vo....welcome back. I see by your join date that you've been at this a while. 5 and a half years it looks like. So in all that time, have you REALLY been able to moderate? If you look at the guidelines of what moderation REALLY is and what we'd like it to be there is a pretty big difference but we usually fail at both anyway....So let's not split hairs....once the Jeannie is out of the bottle, there just is no going back. I'm sure you've heard this before, but the only people who can moderate are the ones who don't realize they are doing it. If you think you've got a problem with AL, you do. So that being said, some other things can take place...and that's the process of healing and getting well. Once we accept that we cannot drink in ANY amount and for any reason, life gets considerably BETTER! It's that nagging voice that makes us think we have a choice that kills us. Make a decision to be/get sober and don't look back. You CAN live a life you are proud of....I tell you, there's no better skin cream or lotion or potion that can make you look better than being sober makes you feel. The occasional discomfort from not being able to partake from time to time is temporary, the feeling of self respect and pride lasts a lifetime. You are not giving up a dam thing that really matters....just a substance in a glass. Make the decision, stay connected with us here, read and post, and you will find success! This disease takes some work to come out of, but you can do it. Or we can be here in another 5 years wondering where the time went?!!! Come join us over in the Newbie's nest...it's very active and we have folks in all stages of quitting. Also check out the Tool Box, both links are below. Welcome aboard! We're glad you're here! Byrdie

I love everything you said here. Really helped me. I gave up AL when I started living a Christian life, and sometimes it does feel discomfortable when you aren't partaking, but then again it is true that the person who can have a good time and feel confident and good about themself without being drunk is the one who truly possesses confidence and not lacking so much they need to have a drink to feel comfortable and have an amazing time. Yet one time someone was laughing at me for not having a drink, when really I think everyone knew the reality that the ones needing to drink were lacking to be reduced to needing that to have self-confidence. When I live an AL-free life, I love it and it feels sooo great and sooo good about yourself and happier and enjoy everything more. It is truly having a good time when you have an awesome time just as you are, no need for AL to escape

[nanootwilson]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Oh, shit - I have to meet my Mom in 5 hours! I'm so drunk!! I feel like a horrible person.

I obviously need to get my shit together

[Eloise]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

hang in there nanootwilson.... hoping you are feeling better now?

[Change]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Im'm going to join you.

AF day 2 for me.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Evening all,
Kinda feeling lonely tonight. It's Friday, trigger as we've drank (me and hubby) for a long, long time together on weekends together. Well, he's not a problem drinker, so tonight he went to the casino with an old friend. I could tell he was feeling a little bad leaving me, as my son is out with his friends, but I kept telling him it was fine. He deserves to get out and have some fun and he really enjoys the casino once in a while. But I guess I had a little, woe is me crap in my head. I think I'm gonna sit here, watch some shows I tapes, read my book "Brain on Fire" which is a really great book by Susannah Cahalan who was diagnosed with a severe mental illness in her early 20's. Great read. And I was thinking I may hop in my hottub. It's a chilly night, and that would be relaxing. So, that's the plan! I texted a friend this morning, and I told her (she also had an AL problem and now goes to AA) that a sober five-day work week is much easier than an alcohol-drenched work week. That is the truth. Oh! Before hubby left, he was telling me how good I look. He's made observations such as I'm not depressed like I was beginning to be in October, and that we haven't fought at all. Yep. Good things are happening. This weekend will be busy, as my son turns 16 and we're having a party for him tomorrow. Just a familiy party, but I've got an AL free wine to sip on. I probably won't even like it, but it'll cut out any unnecessary conversation about why I wasn't drinking.

Pavati, you're right. Eat now, worry about calories later. LIKE! and good advice. Like your weekend plan. We're so good at planning, being educators! Enjoy your evening walk and movie with your friend.

Hi Eloise, Holiday shopping! Oh no! I've gotta get a list together. So glad the supps are helping you. Keep us updated on that and any changes you feel.

Matthew, how nice to see you're feeling great! It's so good to hear from people like you who've had such success away from the bottle. I feel more confident every day. And I like how you said, "having an awesome time just as you are!"

Nanootwilson, stop back and tell us how you're doing. This is a great place to be to get help. We can be here for you.

Change, glad to have you here and congrats on Day 2. That's a really hard time, and we can help you through this. Hopefully you're drinking lots of water with lemon or other fruit juices. I see from your start date you've known MWO for some time. Me too. I joined in '08. And that damn AL voice got me everytime. I'm determined to kick his ass to the curb when he starts toying with me again. Stay close!

Have a good evening all.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

I pulled some books out of my attic. I've read so many, and I'm glad I saved them because I'm ready to re-read most of them. I'm going to share my list. Look up on Amazon to see the reviews, but most of these that I read were really good.

Blackout Girl, Jennifer Storm
In My Skin, Kate Holden
Drunkard, Neil Steinberg
Broken, William Cope Moyers
What Did I Do Last Night, A Drunkard's Tale, Tom Sykes
A Drinking Life, Pete Hamill
Parched, Heather King
Rolling Away, My Agony with Ecstasy, Lynn Marie Smith
Whiskey's Children, Jack Erdmann with Larry Kearney
Comeback, Claire Fontaine and Mia Fontaine
Smashed, Koren Zailckas
Dry, Augusten Burroughs
The End of the World as We Know It, Robert Goolrick
Drinking, a Love Story, Caroline Knapp

and a few celebrities books which I didn't bring back down but enjoyed by Maureen McCormick (Brady Bunch girl, Marlee Matlin (deaf actress), and Melissa Gilbert (Little House on the Prairie).

Other good reads:
Alan Carr
Jason Vale
Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey

Happy Reading!!!

[Pavati]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Happy Friday, Everyone:

Thanks for the book list, J-Vo. I've only read a few of them, but I also would add Lit by Mary Carr. I'm sorry you're a little lonely. My life is so busy that I actually would welcome a night alone to watch my taped shows and take a hot tub. Sigh. The grass is always greener...

I'm not a big fan of shopping - trying to figure out how to do it all online or at local shops. The mall makes me crazy - go boldly, Eloise.

Welcome Nanoot and Change. Nanoot - what happened with your mom? Are you here to quit drinking?

Change, day 2 on a Friday is hard. Eat and read, eat and read. Have you been to the Newbies Nest?

I can? Are you still around? Check in, will you?

I went on a nice walk to the beach during the witching hour and am about to eat pizza. Right now I am feeling good and strong and grateful to love my job and where I live (that allows me to walk to the beach on Nov. 15 after work).

Happy Friday, everyone. I'll try to check in later tonight.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Pavati, how did I miss that one? I read that more recently - Lit by Mary Carr. What a great memoir. She's an excellent writer! Thoroughly enjoyed that one. She has another book also, can't remember the title.