Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

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Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

j-vo;1622746 wrote: There's this guy I work with who is so on my nerves. For years, he's been divorced. He refuses to quit the at least 2 cig. pack a day smoking, has gained lots and lots of weight. But he does nothing about it. He has not changed his habits, nor even tried. I guess what pisses me off is that he doesn't even try, but he wants all this pity. From time to time I give him pity. Most of the time, I wanna knock him the fuck out. I want to scream in his face, if you don't fix yourself and care for yourself, how can you expect someone else to? Stop the fucking pity party and do something about yourself.

Oh! What's that she said? Oh no she didn't. Oh, yes she did. Stop the fucking pity party, j-vo. Stop expecting change when you keep doing the same stupid shit. Stop acting like it's so hard when all you have to do is not pick up one fucking drink. Boo-fucking-hoo. Get on with your life.

Lol! Can you please start your own comedy show? You'd be hilarious

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Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

j-vo;1623112 wrote: First, that I really like myself.

I think that's they key. Lol @ the sympathetic NS surgery idea (but, i can understand feeling desperate to try anything), i think you would have blown your money. The things people do to try to extort money out of other people :eeks:

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Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

available;1623250 wrote: What a heartfelt post JVO, addiction is a horrible controlling part of life that hits only some people, thats what makes us special really. I too took the speed, coke, weed to make life easier when in reality it never did. If we know now what we didnt know then maybe our lives would be different but if we didnt have that past life we would not be who we are today.

You are a strong beautiful woman who has been through hell and back and now it is time to live life the way you deserve.

Its funny when we are in the depths of despair that we dont realise what we have and cherish in our life. A lot of people have that realisation when it is too late so for us we are lucky. Now is the time to be as happy as we can and to live life the way we have always deserved but didnt know or realise.

The switch has switched for you my lovely friend and you know now that life is so worth living and everyday may be different but that is the fun of living.

I was quite ill a few weeks ago and honestly thought i might have had a serious illness. If i knew i only had 3-6 months to live and realised that i have lived my life as miserably as i have, i would be devastated. So, yeah, you're right about appreciating, and even cherishing things in our lives. Thank you for the sobering reminder. I would never want to realise these things when it is too late, and i absolutely empathise with anyone who has. We need to act and live NOW, you're right!

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Change, Your welcome. Let's not waste any more of our precious lives to Al.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...ect-78410.html

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

This is from "Relapse in Retrospect Thread" and it would be a good idea to keep these things in check .

Change in Attitude - For some reason you decide that participating in your recovery program is just not as important as it was. You may begin to return to what some call "stinking thinking" or unhealthy or addictive thinking. Basically, you are not working your program as you did previously. You feel something is wrong, but can't identify exactly what it is.

Elevated Stress - An increase in stress in your life can be due to a major change in circumstances or just little things building up. Returning to the "real world" after a stint in residential treatment can present many stressful situations. The danger is if you begin over-reacting to those situations. Be careful if you begin to have mood swings and exaggerated positive or negative feelings.

Reactivation of Denial - This is not denial that you have a drug or alcohol problem, it's denial that the stress is getting to you. You try to convince yourself that everything is OK, but it's not. You may be scared or worried, but you dismiss those feelings and you stop sharing those feelings with others. This is dangerous because this denial is very similar to denial of drug addiction or abuse.

Recurrence of Postacute Withdrawal Symptoms - Anxiety, depression, sleeplessness and memory loss can continue long after you quit drinking or doing drugs. Known as postacute withdrawal symptoms these symptoms can return during times of stress. They are dangerous because you may be tempted to self-medicate them with alcohol or drugs.

Behavior Change - You may begin to change the daily routine that you developed in early sobriety that helped you replace your compulsive behaviors with healthy alternatives. You might begin to practice avoidance or become defensive in situations that call for an honest evaluation of your behavior. You could begin using poor judgment and causing yourself problems due to impulsive behavior without thinking things through.

Social Breakdown - You may begin feeling uncomfortable around others and making excuses not to socialize. You stop hanging around sober friends or you withdraw from family members. You stop going to your support group meetings or you cut way back on the number of meetings you attend. You begin to isolate yourself.

Loss of Structure - You begin to completely abandon the daily routine or schedule that you developed in early sobriety. You may begin sleeping late, or ignoring personal hygiene or skipping meals. You stop making constructive plans and when the plans you do make don't work out, you overreact. You begin focusing on one small part of life to the exclusion of everything else.

Loss of Judgment - You begin to have trouble making decisions or you make unhealthy decisions. You may experience difficulty in managing your feelings and emotions. It may be hard to think clearly and you become confused easily. You may feel overwhelmed for no apparent reason or not being able to relax. You may become annoyed or angry easily.

Loss of Control - You make irrational choices and are unable to interrupt or alter those choices. You begin to actively cut off people who can help you. You begin to think that you can return to social drinking and recreational drug use and you can control it. You may begin to believe there is no hope. You lose confidence in your ability to manage your life.

Loss of Options - You begin to limit your options. You stop attending all meetings with counselors and your support groups and discontinue any pharmacotherapy treatments. You may feel loneliness, frustration, anger, resentment and tension. You might feel helpless and desperate. You come to believe that there are only three ways out: insanity, suicide, or self-medication with alcohol or drugs.

Relapse - You attempt controlled, "social" or short-term alcohol or drug use, but you are disappointed at the results and immediately experience shame and guilt. You quickly lose control and your alcohol and drug use spirals further out of control. This causes you increasing problems with relationships, jobs, money, mental and physical health. You need help getting sober again.

There's also an interesting page of reader's responses to the question "What are you biggest relapse triggers and how do you deal with them?"

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

It's Friday Night...

No matter what happens, I WILL NOT DRINK.
No matter how I feel, I Will NOT DRINK.
I don't drink,

[available]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

If you drink, i will have to KILL you ha ha. I dont drink either Jvo and i never will now.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

:hAva, dear

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

It's Sunday, and Friday and Saturday for me were quite nice, A basketball Friday night, home, tired bed. Saturday night, I had the choice of going out to work a baseball fundraiser or stay home for a quiet night. I chose the latter, not because I was afraid to face the night out. I know that those kinds of nights for me were dangerous, and I would actually get myself worked up and try to talk myself into being careful with my drinking. Well, that failed most of the time, and most of the time in those situations I managed to say something stupid to someone, slur, or just look a bit out of it, and maybe a little more than a bit. So I could have gone knowing that i wouldn't have to worry about looking so stupid. And i wasn't giving up my quit. Not this time, not ever. So, then I thought it would be nice to relax at home since I was tired. I had been out Friday night and all day Saturday. That's what I chose, and I'm glad I made that choice. I enjoyed sitting with some nice candles (can't use my damn fireplace because all the stink bugs live there) my Ipad, and just some light music. Yeah, that was a nice evening. I also spent time watching alcohol documentaries. One, Cherry Healy "Old Before My Time" was a really good documentary. I think I'll post that for the young-ins on the forum.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Good Monday. Busy teaching day. Really peaceful feeling. Productive! Kids good. Son had good day. Hubby good also. Allsgood.

[lead366]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Right on J-VO!!

All you have to do now is keep thinking the good thoughts. For me?......there is never again the 'Hmmm I wonder what that may be like?) Piss on it! pardon the pun....Its AF from here on in!

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Good attitude Lead!!!!

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

What, exactly, is Pinterest?

You know when you're browsing online and see something you love and don't want to forget? What do you do -- email it to yourself? Print it out and put it in a binder? Bookmark it on your computer? Now there's a simple way to compile all of the great things you find online -- from clothes to DIY home ideas to inspiration for your bathroom remodel -- on Pinterest!
What am I suppose to pin?

Here's the great thing about Pinterest -- you can pin anything you want! Everyone uses it for different things -- from saving recipes that you want to make to saving articles that you want to reference later (we can, ahem, certainly suggest some you should pin!) to all of the shoes you'd love to add to your closet for spring -- so Pinterest can easily be whatever you want it to be.
As you start pinning, create "Boards" that categorize your pins, making them easy for you to find later. Pinterest suggests some to get you started, but usually you'll want to create your own to fit what you love to pin. It takes a while to get the hang of creating boards -- they need to be the perfect combination of general and specific -- but we promise that the more you pin, the better your boards will become.

How do I get started pinning?

You can go to the Pinterest website and create an account. (You also have the option of creating the account through your Facebook profile or Twitter account if you care to.)

Once you're on, the next thing you'll need is the "Pin It" button installed in your browser toolbar. This magic little button is what allows you to pin things online. Installing the button is very easy -- when you're in your Pinterest account, look to the upper right-hand corner and hover above "About," then click on "Pin It Button" and follow the directions to drag the button into your toolbar.
Or instead of using the "Pin It" button, you can also copy and paste links from sites you like, and it will search for photos from that page, which you can then pin. You can also upload photos from your computer.

Once you've added friends to your Pinterest account -- you follow them as you follow Facebook or Twitter friends -- you will have a customized feed where you can see all of the fantastic things that they're pinning too. See an idea you love? Just hover over that pin in the feed and click on the "Repin" button to add it to one of your boards.
For more info:

Content of this post came from: Pinterest: What it is, how to use it and why you'll be addicted

Another good article: How to Use Pinterest: Step-by-Step Guide

Note: Initially Pinterest was by Invite Only. This is no longer the case. Pinterest is free and there are no pop up adds.

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Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

I dont know if i should post this here, but relapsed a few days age and can definately see why i can't go back to this thing. I feel negative, drained and what happened to my confidence?!

Here we go again, but feel better for having the 2 weeks under my belt before last night

Hope everyone's going well.