Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

[SpiritGirl]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

I believe He brought me to MWO too... And based on our join dates, it looks like He brought us here almost the same time .... Now I just need to stick to it and stay here... I am so much better when I am plugged in to the boards and the people here... At one time I had several PM friends and that really helped... I am hoping to get back to that point......Thanks again... I am looking forward to watching for your posts...

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Sprit, let's stick with it one day at a time! Post daily. I'm also better when I post at least twice a dayl.

NS posted this in loamers:

1. I lay down the heavy weight of doubt, shame, guilt and embarrassment.

2. I release the past so I can step into the future with pure intentions.

3. I am capable of moving beyond my mistakes.

4. I am able to heal from the hurt and pain of what I have caused.

5. I am worthy of all the compassion and kindness life offers me.

6. I forgive myself one day at a time until it’s complete.

7. I gently release the grip of anger and rage from my body.

8. I set my past free and forgive my participation in it.

9. I give up the hope of a different past by accepting my true past.

10. I trust my present and future decisions based on love and good intentions.

11. I trade my anger and rage for understanding and compassion.

12. I accept that I did the best I could at the time with what I knew.

13. I have the courage to heal and become whole again.

14. I will treat myself with respect and kindness from today forward.

15. I forgive others as I forgive myself: with ease, sincerity and loving compassion.

16. I take this small step toward greater growth.

17. I am willing to live with all of who I am.

18. I am capable of loving all of who I am.

19. I go with the flow that life brings me.

20. I grow more patient and understanding of others by forgiving myself.

21. I let go of all self-judgement and self-sabotage.

22. I melt into an ocean of love and forgiveness.

23. I grow stronger and better as I forgive myself to move on.

24. I forgive myself so that I can have inner peace again.

25. I can only share my gift with the world if I first forgive myself.

25 Affirmations to Forgive Yourself

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

From an article by Don Blackwell; a prayer

I wish . . .

I wish you victory against the cruel inner voice,

To see self-acceptance truly is a choice.

I wish you victory against the worries that fill your mind,

To seek contentment that you shall surely find.

I wish you victory against a tunnel vision that blinds your view,

From the exquisite beauty that radiates from you.

I wish you victory against the dark thoughts that invade your sleep,

To instead be filled with peace that you shall forever keep.

And through each victory that comes with each passing day,

A melody to fill your heart, for you my friend, I pray.

Loving messages becoming more and more clear,

Drowning out the haunting voice of inner doubt and fear.

And finally you will hear it, and life will truly begin,

The victory song of self-acceptance that only comes from within.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Pav posted about Sarah Allan Benton, author of Understanding the High Functioning Alcoholic. I bought the kindle edition of the book. Here are highlights from the book:

BTW, thiis soooooo me:

Perfectionist • Overachiever • Good student • People pleaser • Need for other's approval • Fear of other's opinions • Motivated by praise • Belief that doing well will lead to positive feelings of self • Ability to hide true feelings • High standards of personal achievement • An innate ability to manipulate other's perceptions

Wow, hit the nail right on the head! All except for the last one, I think...

And this...

Often, through failed attempts at controlling drinking, HFAs are led to their bottom, which can be defined as "the place an alcoholic must reach before he or she finally is ready to admit that he or she has a problem and reaches out for help."1 It often takes repeated defeat in controlling drinking for an individual to chip away at his or her denial enough to see that he or she is alcoholic.

and...

To high-functioning alcoholics (HFAs), controlled drinking appears to be a solution to the problems they experience when they drink too much. If they could drink moderately, then they could have alcohol in their lives without suffering the consequences of excessive drinking. Control is the glimmer of hope that enables their infatuation with alcohol to continue.

Just some food for thought... After building up our AF days, we tend to think that we've got control over this beast. We have that glimmer of hope that we can drink moderately. That is an alcoholic brain.

[Dila]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

j-vo love the poem...very inspirational!

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Glad you liked it too, Dila!

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

It's day 34 for me. I feel that I'm in a great place, better than I ever have in my life. The peace, happiness, but also the other emotions that aren't so fun are doable for me. It's quite an amazing feeling.

I joined the Newbie's Nest, as I thought I could help out there. I've had so many "restarts" and I thought being connected to others in the same boat as me would be helpful in my journey. Giving back is such a gift, and as NS has said, typing out these thoughts to others is helpful to us. She's right again! It makes us reflect on ourselves, and at the same time, helps others. MWO has, imo, is saving my life, giving me a new life, one that I never experienced, one that I never knew was possible.

In my daily life, I've been happy, contented, yet able to deal with those curveballs. My relationships are getting stronger as I'm able to see past my own selfish self and care for others.

So, thanks MWO, for being here. Thanks Roberta Jewell. Thanks MWO members.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Posted by Nar:

Quote:
God often uses our deepest pain as the launching pad of our greatest calling.

[NoraC]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

j-vo;1656625 wrote: Pav posted about Sarah Allan Benton, author of Understanding the High Functioning Alcoholic. I bought the kindle edition of the book. Here are highlights from the book:

BTW, thiis soooooo me:

Perfectionist ? Overachiever ? Good student ? People pleaser ? Need for other's approval ? Fear of other's opinions ? Motivated by praise ? Belief that doing well will lead to positive feelings of self ? Ability to hide true feelings ? High standards of personal achievement ? An innate ability to manipulate other's perceptions

Wow, hit the nail right on the head! All except for the last one, I think...

And this...

Often, through failed attempts at controlling drinking, HFAs are led to their bottom, which can be defined as "the place an alcoholic must reach before he or she finally is ready to admit that he or she has a problem and reaches out for help."1 It often takes repeated defeat in controlling drinking for an individual to chip away at his or her denial enough to see that he or she is alcoholic.

and...

To high-functioning alcoholics (HFAs), controlled drinking appears to be a solution to the problems they experience when they drink too much. If they could drink moderately, then they could have alcohol in their lives without suffering the consequences of excessive drinking. Control is the glimmer of hope that enables their infatuation with alcohol to continue.

Just some food for thought... After building up our AF days, we tend to think that we've got control over this beast. We have that glimmer of hope that we can drink moderately. That is an alcoholic brain.

Thank you for that.
? People pleaser ? Need for other's approval ? Fear of other's opinions ?
That certainly hits home for me.

PS - Love your avatar and your Abe Lincoln quote.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Thanks Nora! I did start reading it and it's a good one.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Got back from a trip with our 8th grade class last night. It was amazing. I've been on this trip several times, but this year, I felt a difference that I want to share.

When you have to tour and walk for three straight days, you need energy. Not that I'm fit right now, but I had such a great mental energy to do this that I've never had in the past. I was interested in the sites so much more, had a bounce in my steps, and tiredness didn't hit at unwanted times.

Not only did the sites thrill me, but being with the people was such a blessing. From our 14 year olds to the adult chaperones, the ability to appreciate them was like never before. My tolerance, love, and appreciation for others is growing, and, WOW, what a great feeling that is. I'm able to see the beauty in those around me, laugh a true and real laugh with others, empathize with those that need it, and encourage when needed. This trip has made me appreciate those in my life so much more.

It seems as though alcohol numbed my senses when I wasn't even under the influence, and now, every sense seems to be heightened and stronger. Colors are prettier. Sound, touch, and smells are more acute. Tastebuds are sensitive and just eating pizza tastes great to me.

So, the longer I am away from alcohol, the better I'm feeling with myself, with others, and with my surroundings. It's really worth it, so much more than I've ever dreamed possible.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Great blog that I'll return to!

Stick a fork in me ... I'm done | My life without alcohol

[little beagle]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Good blog. I like it.

[j-vo]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

She's really down to earth and funny!

[frances]

Just Starting Out...for the thousandth time

Hi guys - hope you don't mind my stopping in. Just wanted to say I saw this post about the blog and have been sitting here reading it for awhile here now. Love it. I started back at the beginning and got to her 90 day post...since I'm not to 90 days yet I'm thinking I'll wait and return to reading this after I get there (which I will!) so I can see her thoughts when she was at about the same place that I am. I might not be able to do that though. I'd like to just keep reading! Anyway thanks for the link J-Vo!