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    Just joined after lurking for a couple weeks

    Hello all. So far I've liked what I've read and the process. I woke up this morning feeling under the weather (yeah, right) and checked out the level left in last nights bottle of wine. Almost finished a whole bottle (hm - I'm not a big person) ... can't say my life is out of control, but I do know that I want to feel good again and just quittin' doesn't last for long, and neither has moderation. I'm eager to change, I feel ashamed of myself, and I see that the recycling bin is FULL of my empty red wine bottles. My drinking is the major obstacle in making more of my life and my friendships ... husband isn't too concerned unless I say or do something to embarrass him ... he's not a drinker at all and seems strangely neutral with whether I quit, cut down, or continue - he's been with me through all three. Anyway, that's me. Not about to crash my car or lose my job over my drinking, not yet anyway, and I stopped giving myself drunken haircuts in college. I come from a long line of responsible, hardworking, reliable alcoholics, but I am not enjoying feeling lousy and I am tired of waking up at 3 am after too many glasses of zin and I want to put my energy into doing great things with my life. When I skip the booze I sleep like a baby. I tried AA a few years back and was put off by it's culty-ness and sense that I wasn't a bad enough drunk to join. Anyway, I am looking forward to getting to know everyone and getting control of my drinking. Thanks!
    :new:
    "There are two types of education... One should teach us how to make a living, And the other how to live.? ― John Adams

    #2
    Just joined after lurking for a couple weeks

    :welcome: Welcome ZZ Your story is very similar to many here and I had the same experience as well with AA. The supps work very well as do the CDs. Hope to see you around.
    Sometimes I wonder...."Why is that frisbee getting bigger?"...and then it hits me.

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      #3
      Just joined after lurking for a couple weeks

      Welcome. I could relate to a lot of what you said. My husband is very neutral about my drinking as well, I think because he does not drink himself so does not understand the internal struggle we go through. Try the supplements, the CDs have really helped me, and keep reading and posting here. This is a great place.
      I'm really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me

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        #4
        Just joined after lurking for a couple weeks

        Hi Zin &

        Read as many of the posts as you can, I'ts not easy but with the help of everyone here it is acheivable ...

        All the best ........ Attached files [img]/converted_files/236795=959-attachment.jpg[/img]
        sigpicXXX

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          #5
          Just joined after lurking for a couple weeks

          :welcome: Zin -

          Your story is certainly familiar! - now 60 AF days later I'm wondering why I waited so long to take my problem seriously enough to make the change. Life is just so unbelievably different from this side of the bottle! I hope you find what you're looking for - we're here to help you along the way so keep posting, sharing - we're listening!
          :rays: Arial

          Last first day - 15th April 2012
          Goals:
          Days 1-7 DONE
          Days 8-14 DONE
          Days 15-21 DONE
          30 days DONE
          60 days
          100 days

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            #6
            Just joined after lurking for a couple weeks

            Thanks for writing! I've been reading the posts for a week or so, and this evening I've started to fill in some of the blanks so that I can have a presence here. I look forward to a journey to a new life with all of you! Thanks so much.
            :thanks:

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              #7
              Just joined after lurking for a couple weeks

              Welcome to you too Heloise!!!
              I'm really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me

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                #8
                Just joined after lurking for a couple weeks

                hi there, i know how you feel. Just found this sight myself and ordered the book. I have the same problems re sleeping. When I've had a drink, I automatically wake up about 2-3am and can't get back to sleep. I'm full of guilt and panic attacks and convince myself that I am doing so much harm to my body and that I'll change tomorrow. You're not alone. Janice
                AF since 9 May 2012
                Quit trying to control something that is uncontrollable (Bear February 08)

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                  #9
                  Just joined after lurking for a couple weeks

                  Thanks so much for your warm welcomes. In Chinese medicine 1 am - 3 am is the time of the Liver, which they see related to anger, life changes, life purpose, among other things. I am happy that there doesn't seem to be ONE RIGHT WAY in this community for those of us who want to drink less, or be totally AF. I once stopped drinking for 3-1/2 years, started again after my dad died, was moderate for a long time ... then heavier. Quit again 6 years ago for about 4 months after too many evil hangovers in too short a time. I want to lose some weight and one or two glasses of wine always make me decide that I look okay, what's an extra 10 pounds, and isn't being skinny really overrated? But I'm hating that low grade dull feeling after having a few too many the night before, purplish lips, puffy face - ick. I refuse to HIDE my habits, hence the shame in the recycling bin FULL of bottles, all mine, except for a few of hubby's lonely Sam Adams. Once I even saw my greyhound trotting across the lawn with a not-quite-empty bottle of Shiraz in her mouth that she must've gotten from the bin and she had spread more wine bottles around the lawn. My first thought was hoping the neighbors didn't see. In fact, I do think about that on recycling day! Thankfully that was a one-time trick of hers. It's a beautiful day today, my day off, and I'm feeling crummy.
                  "There are two types of education... One should teach us how to make a living, And the other how to live.? ― John Adams

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                    #10
                    Just joined after lurking for a couple weeks

                    Welcome! I'm new also and loving it so far.

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                      #11
                      Just joined after lurking for a couple weeks

                      I don't know what I can add to all the beautiful things all of you have written above. All of the posts sound like the story of my life. I am so glad you have found us and that we have found you - a new friend.
                      Your dog running around your yard with a wine bottle - that is so funny! We can all relate to the shame. And to how stupid and funny our lives have become because of the bottle. Tragic and funny at times.
                      Remember that tragedy can always be replaced by happiness. That's what we are all here for and why we will always be here for you.
                      You're on your way!!!
                      :welcome:
                      Rest in Peace, Bear. We miss you.

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                        #12
                        Just joined after lurking for a couple weeks

                        In the same boat

                        Your story has my name all over it, thanks for sharing. I too am always second guessing my problem but every morning I know the answer. The waking up at 3:00 is getting old. I am also new, have not started the supplements or CD's, everything is on order.
                        Give it a try, I am!!!

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